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17 years old and depressed

I am pretty sure it's not normal to be this depressed and unhappy in life at my age. It's my senior year and I should be happy and hopeful about my future and I just feel like I don't stand a chance. I have overcome an abusive relationship and kept it a secret from everyone. I didnt think that the abuse had much of an effect on me until recently. However, its not a reason for me to be depressed, not sleeping, irritable, and difficult to be around all the time. I was always the sweetheart that would go out of her way for everyone. Now, I find it hard to get what I need done for myself, let alone others. I cant discuss my problems with my parents because they think my life is easy and perfect. I dont know what to do in order to get better. Please help, I just want to be happy again.
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First Helper HayTay11
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replied April 6th, 2012
The same thing happened to me my junior and senior year. I wanted something to change in my life so bad... The littlest things drove me nuts and everyone just poked at my buttons anyway. I got myself into all kinds of trouble with boys and I don't know how I avoided the drinking and drugs and porn has been the worst thing. I know I feel so embarrassed. I thought only boys had that problem and I have had it since I was 11. (I have finally gone a year completely clean!) Then when I was finally trying to get over all of it I found out about my dad's secret affairs and drug and drinking problems and it had been going on for 20 years! and now my mom is divorcing him. HOW did I miss all of this. so literally within one week toward the end of my senior year I decided to join the Military. Didn't even research I just went to the first one I stumbled upon the Army Reserve. and then I went through the training and it's been a year now and since I got home from that and the first thing on my mind was to move out just by myself, I had all these army hoo-rah dreams of being airborne and traveling! of course the boy problem was still prevalent... Sometimes I'd wish I could just start my life over and I know exactly what I would change.. Now I'm actually married and we moved to a different state! and I have someone who treats me like a princess(but he still makes sure I'm don't get spoiled rotten:) I have no idea what I want to be when I grow up, I just want to travel with my honey and have babies (LATER)and make sure that they have a mom that understands or at least tries and asks and wants to be apart of their life. you know? Oh, yes doesn't senior year drag..? Seriously, what do you want to do? get a notebook and plan your dream life every detail; wedding, house, husband, places you're going, etc. and then realistically what would you have to do to make it? It's just fun:) I even draw what I want my future house to look like. I have always wanted to be a SANE nurse(CSI rape victim nurse) I'm starting school and only 4 more years... ya that changed how about someone take me to the Maldives!:)Wow this is getting too long. I hope I helped a little bit.. You seem like a sweet girl that deserves a lot more than you're getting. It gets better when you break free of all the drama and get to breathe for a minute.
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