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Why would a pro-choice teen ever choose to continue a pregnancy? (Page 1)

I specifically mean young teens who are still in school, live at home and are dependent on others, etc.
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replied March 25th, 2009
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I chose to continue my pregnancy because I was 4 months along when I found out due to birth control already messing up my cycle (never knew when my next period would come, took antibiotics for a UTI, and they interfered with the pill), had a good job, had a very stable relationship (to this day, I still do), had my own place, and could not stand the thought of either adopting out or abortion, especially because I found out I was pregnant and automatically had an ultrasound. I could not hear that heartbeat and see my son, whom I loved and knew I was able to support, and then abort him. Plus, I was too far along for an elective abortion, so it never crossed my mind. I still dislike the idea of abortion but I AM prochoice. I may not like the idea, but it should still be a choice. And I should never try and make the decision for someone else. And I understand how much we still need abortions, especially since birth control is still unreliable and some women who never want children cannot get the tubals they so desperately want. Plus so many children, older children, black or latino or mixed race children, children with special needs, etc are STILL waiting for a loving adoptive family. Abortion will always be necessary until we fix this birth control failure/denial and overpopulation crisis. And until prospective adoptive parents realize that a six year old with cerebal palsy or a two year old black child deserves the same amount of love and is capable of giving the same amount of love as a perfectly healthy white newborn baby. And I have the right to speak like this, I am adopted and I know the system quite well. Took 4 years before someone was willing to adopt me. I wasn't unhealty, I was just considered "damaged" because of severe physical, sexual, verbal and emotional abuse.
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replied March 25th, 2009
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Not all pro-choicers would choose abortion for themselves.
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replied March 25th, 2009
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I don't know Chriss....

what I write is probably irrlevant but I still classify under teenager lol.

I got pregnant at 19, I was married, stable, had a car, appt and a permanent job, I think it was because of this sitiuation I kept my pregancy.

I sometimes wonder how you can keep a kid when you are not financially, emotionally or even physically ready for it. Now that I said that Im going to contradict myself. currently I am a single mother, was laid off, nowhere to live and I'm once again dependant. I refused social assistance and work odd jobs just to make ends meet on top of my baby bonus.

Me and the kids father have an off/on friendship, somedays are fantastic and other days I wish I never had kids.

Somedays it would be that much easier for me to go social assistance but I feel its wrong, it doesn't solve the issues at hand. I'm stressed out of my mind alot, somedays I want to give up and just walk out on my kids and other I could never believe that I would think such a thought. I want to go back to school (college) but it costs money for daycare, god it costs money for everything.

The kids act out(behavioral problems) because dad isn't always in the picture and they love their dad.

Im probably forking out a good (500-1000$) a month just on the kids diapers,food, resp, food, vitamins, clothes, etc....

I sometimes wonder why some of these girls would put themselves through this, its beyond hard and I really wish they would think it over. Somedays I genuinely wish I could have a break, that I could just clear my mind without having lil ones nearby.

You loose yourself, your sanity and I joke around about it sometimes but its not a joke, kids aren't a joke.

I wish 11+yrs olds would enjoy their life, why do they have the need to play doll or fill a void?
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replied March 25th, 2009
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Thanks for the answers so far, but none of you were really in the situation outlined in the op.
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replied March 25th, 2009
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But I was a teen and I was pro-choice. I was also still in school and still somewhat dependant on my parents. Yes, I did not live with them but that was due to my mother at odds with me over my own life. If you want answers to your question, its best to get answers from a VARIETY of people in the scenerio you outlined PLUS those of us who were in a very similar scenario, such as myself. I think you will be hard pressed to find any teenager admittedly pro-choice and pregnant or already parenting to answer your question. From a close perspective, if you look at all the responses to girls in the teen pregnancy forum when someone mentions abortion, they are very narrow minded and start the "omg, that is a BABY you are killing". A lot of teenagers, not all, cannot see past the baby part (even though that comes nine months later, normally)and could not expand their minds to include any other scenario other than social reasons for an abortion. I've noticed that a lot of adults here also lack that perspective. I, too, like you, aochriss, do not fully understand why some of these teens don't consider abortion, but I do see how some factors regarding their situations might prevent one from occuring, such as parental or babydaddy interference, the "shame" factor of abortion (which there should be none of), that they are trying to prove that they can be all grown up, or that they had no clue they were pregnant, there are just so many factors at play.
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replied March 26th, 2009
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Re: Why would a pro-choice teen ever choose to continue a pregna
aochriss wrote:
I specifically mean young teens who are still in school, live at home and are dependent on others, etc.


The response would be maybe for other people but no for myself.

I got pregnant at 17 as well, while going to school, work and living at home, it would be physically impossible for me to carry a pregnancy to term. There is no way in hell I could have supported that kid, I was immature, I was into partying, I needed and education and I was still dependant on my parents. So after a long conversation I had an abortion, personally for myself I do not think it is possible for a kid to be having kid and I mean the ones who are dependant, not people in mothersofhighspirits sitiuation.
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replied March 26th, 2009
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Re: Why would a pro-choice teen ever choose to continue a pregna
diamondsz wrote:
aochriss wrote:
I specifically mean young teens who are still in school, live at home and are dependent on others, etc.


The response would be maybe for other people but no for myself.

I got pregnant at 17 as well, while going to school, work and living at home, it would be physically impossible for me to carry a pregnancy to term. There is no way in hell I could have supported that kid, I was immature, I was into partying, I needed and education and I was still dependant on my parents. So after a long conversation I had an abortion, personally for myself I do not think it is possible for a kid to be having kid and I mean the ones who are dependant, not people in mothersofhighspirits sitiuation.


Why was it impossible to carry the pregnancy to term? I worked during whole pregnancy and carried my baby to term with no problem. I would have been physically easier if I was at school for sure. And if you were inmature with the baby you would have matured. There is no excuses.
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replied March 27th, 2009
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i chose to continue with my pregnancy, because my baby was healthy, i was[and still am] in a good relationship with a supportive boyfriend, could afford to raise my child, and had a good support team, was in my last year of high school, am not dependant on others to raise myself or my child, graduated, can go to college later on in life.

if we found out our son was going to have health issues or we could not financially afford to have a child at the time, we would not have continued with the pregnancy.
the only way i would ever abort is if the baby is not healthy, because i do not feel it is fair to let a child grow up suffering, and if we could not afford to raise that child, because he or she would miss out on alot.

because we can meet all our son's goals and because we have a healthy son, we continued with the pregnancy.
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replied March 27th, 2009
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I'd imagine a prochoice teen might elect to keep a pregnancy for the same reason a prolife teen might elect to abort: Her situation isn't what she expected it to be and she'd either more or less capable than she thought.

For the record, "Prochoice" doesn't mean "instant abortion". Supporting a female's choice to incubate or abort a pregnancy has little to do with personal circumstances and what each individual feels they should/must do in a crisis situation.
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replied March 27th, 2009
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Re: Why would a pro-choice teen ever choose to continue a pregna
nightangel73 wrote:
diamondsz wrote:
aochriss wrote:
I specifically mean young teens who are still in school, live at home and are dependent on others, etc.


The response would be maybe for other people but no for myself.

I got pregnant at 17 as well, while going to school, work and living at home, it would be physically impossible for me to carry a pregnancy to term. There is no way in hell I could have supported that kid, I was immature, I was into partying, I needed and education and I was still dependant on my parents. So after a long conversation I had an abortion, personally for myself I do not think it is possible for a kid to be having kid and I mean the ones who are dependant, not people in mothersofhighspirits sitiuation.


Why was it impossible to carry the pregnancy to term? I worked during whole pregnancy and carried my baby to term with no problem. I would have been physically easier if I was at school for sure. And if you were inmature with the baby you would have matured. There is no excuses.
I'm not getting into this. Okay, maybe just a little. There are certian women out there, myself included, that CANNOT physically carry a baby to term. You seem to have this "if I can do it, everyone else can too" complex. This is not the case. Is it that hard for you to understand that EVERYBODY and EVERY BODY is different?
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replied March 28th, 2009
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motherofhighspiritedones wrote:
But I was a teen and I was pro-choice. I was also still in school and still somewhat dependant on my parents. Yes, I did not live with them but that was due to my mother at odds with me over my own life. If you want answers to your question, its best to get answers from a VARIETY of people in the scenerio you outlined PLUS those of us who were in a very similar scenario, such as myself.


I do want answers from a variety of people, and I appreciate your contributions.
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replied March 29th, 2009
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Re: Why would a pro-choice teen ever choose to continue a pregna
nightangel73 wrote:
diamondsz wrote:
aochriss wrote:
I specifically mean young teens who are still in school, live at home and are dependent on others, etc.


The response would be maybe for other people but no for myself.

I got pregnant at 17 as well, while going to school, work and living at home, it would be physically impossible for me to carry a pregnancy to term. There is no way in hell I could have supported that kid, I was immature, I was into partying, I needed and education and I was still dependant on my parents. So after a long conversation I had an abortion, personally for myself I do not think it is possible for a kid to be having kid and I mean the ones who are dependant, not people in mothersofhighspirits sitiuation.


Why was it impossible to carry the pregnancy to term? I worked during whole pregnancy and carried my baby to term with no problem. I would have been physically easier if I was at school for sure. And if you were inmature with the baby you would have matured. There is no excuses.


I don't need an excuse, I had an abortion and I do not regret, what bothers you the fact that some of us do it because we know we cannot do it...

If you want I can go back in time "GET RID OF MY TWO BORN CHILDREN" and then carry that pregnancy at a loss of two other lives, see the problem.

Maturity you crack me up, I still haven't grown up, I guess you could call me a kid at heart if you want, even with the kids now I barely have the patience to do it.
Your" I can do it so you can too, is absolute BS I could use another statements to indicate how these words only apply to the individual. Example I can lift 300 lbs so I think you should do it too NA...
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replied March 29th, 2009
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Re: Why would a pro-choice teen ever choose to continue a pregna
nightangel73 wrote:


And if you were inmature with the baby you would have matured. There is no excuses.


On another note I don't think its mature to live off social assistance, I believe in working for the money I want to obtain but being under 18 I only qualify for minimum wage (that doesn't even pay daycare.)
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replied March 30th, 2009
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I guess it boils down to the fact that somewhere, deep down inside, the women who got pregnant while still in school and dependent upon others who had their children must have wanted to have a baby at the time.
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replied March 31st, 2009
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Why do fully adult women have children they can't/won't support without taxpayer dollars? The question doesn't just apply to one age group.

I can only speculate. I've never felt overwhelmed by a desire to reproduce. I feel fortunate, because I certainly don't have the financial, physical or emotional status to birth and raise a kid.
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replied March 31st, 2009
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I would have thought it's the same as anyone who is pro-choice going ahead with an unplanned pregnancy: being pro-choice has no bearing on what YOU would do in the situation, only that you believe that everyone woman has the right to make her own choice.
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replied March 31st, 2009
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oopoopoop wrote:
I would have thought it's the same as anyone who is pro-choice going ahead with an unplanned pregnancy: being pro-choice has no bearing on what YOU would do in the situation, only that you believe that everyone woman has the right to make her own choice.


Well, I guess I just can't wrap my head around someone doing everything in their power to avoid getting pregnant by using birth control, etc., still being in school, living with mom and dad, suddenly deciding to have a baby.
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replied March 31st, 2009
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Darkmoon wrote:
Why do fully adult women have children they can't/won't support without taxpayer dollars? The question doesn't just apply to one age group.



Because they really want a baby.
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replied April 1st, 2009
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aochriss wrote:
oopoopoop wrote:
I would have thought it's the same as anyone who is pro-choice going ahead with an unplanned pregnancy: being pro-choice has no bearing on what YOU would do in the situation, only that you believe that everyone woman has the right to make her own choice.


Well, I guess I just can't wrap my head around someone doing everything in their power to avoid getting pregnant by using birth control, etc., still being in school, living with mom and dad, suddenly deciding to have a baby.


Well, I do agree with you completely. And yes, a lot of teenagers who are using BC conscientiously get pregnant. But I suspect that there are more teenagers who get pregnant because they have only a dim grasp of the facts of life, are not using BC conscientiously or at all, and (if you ever read some of the train wrecks on teen pregnancy sites) don't actually know how pregnancy happens.
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