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Want a baby after forced abortion

Hey all, I'm knew to this but I thought it would be wise to come on here and express how I'm feeling and hopefully get some sense from it all...

About 2 months ago I was forced into an abortion by my Dad, everyone else was happy and supportive, my boyfriend was so happy about the pregnancy, as was I.. I don't want to go into detail about my ''Dad'' but he made all sorts of threats towards me (He had been abusive to me in the past) and about my boyfriend so I aborted...
Everyday I regret it, I hate myself for it, all I want is my baby back.. I had the implant put in but I am considering taking it out now, and possibly trying again, my boyfriend has been more than supportive despite not knowing about my dad pushing me into an abortion.. He would love a child, he loves children as do I. Thankfully my dad isn't around any-more, I feel as though I can't justify the abortion though.. I'm nearly 17 you might want to say I'm not ready for a baby, but surely if that was the truth I wouldn't be living with this heart ache now, I wouldn't have such a massive problem and want to have a baby.. I'm not dumb or planning to live off benefits, I could defiantly manage, even knowing noone can prepare you for having a child properly, you have to work out what works for you and your baby. I was so delighted when I found out I was pregnant.. I don't really know where I stand.. Would it be a good idea to get pregnant again?
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replied October 19th, 2010
If you really really want a baby the go for it. Im only 14, but my sister is 17 and she has a baby girl who is 1 and she is sooooo happy with her. Ifd you can definatly definatly definatly afford to look after your baby then just do it. Maybe you could even get your own house if your dad gets in the way - hes a totall jerk by the sounds of it. You are wayyy better that him. You sound soooo nice. i bet you'll make an awesome mom/mum. And i really hope you get a baby sooon.xx p.s. if any1 says you are stupid for wanting a baby so young then they are stupid because 17 is not that young and you sound mature 4 ur age. and they are probably about 80 or whatever. GOOD LUUUUCCCKKKKK!! XX
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replied October 23rd, 2010
Hello,
I know how the pain of abortion feels. I had one when I was younger, around your age. After I had it, I was so sad. I wasn't forced into it, but the guy I was with didn't want it, and so I found it hard to keep a child whose father didn't want it.
Roll on 10 years, and hey presto, I was pregnant again. I had only been going out with my now husband for 9 months at the time. It was a shock for both of us. I was 28, had been to college, had been working and so had he. So it was easier for us, and we decided to keep it. He is now a beautiful 2 year old and is the most amazing person I have ever met, the light of my life.
After having that abortion I always wanted kids. I was constantly broody. I was 18 then and really just wanted kids. But I also wanted to travel, go to college, start a career. It was a conflict.
I'm glad I waited. Everyone is different, and for some it is right to have a baby at a very young age. There are lots of advantages to this, such as, when your child is 20 you'll be about 40, which from my perceptive now, is not that old at all. Kids are full of energy and so are you, as 17 is also very young, so this could be a winning combination. Also, Doctor's say that it's easier on your body if you have them young. Also,when you get to your mid 40's, your free, and your kids are grown up and you can live the rest of your days doing whatever you please. Lots of young parents make amazing parents. You just need to dig deep and ask yourself if that's what you really need right now.
Think about what it is you want to achieve from your life. Do you want to go to college, does your boyfriend? Do you want to do some partying or travelling before you settle down?
I found that I did a whole pile of having fun/partying in my early-mid 20's, now I'm relieved not to have to go out as much and happy to have a quiet life.
This also depends hugely on the support you have around you. If you have a family who are happy to babysit a lot, or if you can afford pricey babysitter's, then you can have a baby and still go out partying.
A baby is an amazing thing. I don't think that there is ever really a right time for anyone. You have to ask yourself and your partner what it is you both really want from life. It may mean that you put it off for 3 years or maybe 10. You are the only person who can make this decision. The reason that your Dad is unsupportive is because he is worried about you and thinks that he is doing the right thing for you and your future. It wasn't his decision and I don't think he handled it well, but he probably still see's you as his little girl. My parents were shocked when they learnt I was pregnant, they didn't speak to me for about 3 months and gave me a really hard time... I was 28! I know it's not easy but try and understand his point of view, as it will help your relations in the future.

I hope that this is helpful.

Good luck to you and your partner in the future. I'm so sorry about your abortion, it is such a painful and awful thing to have to deal with.
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replied December 18th, 2011
i was forced into having an abortion by my mother about 6 months ago and it is still hard for me to deal with...i will be 18 in two months and i still want to have another baby. i loved being a mom for the short period of time that i was. i was 2 months pregnant when she forced me to do that. worst day of my life. it is your decision i cant say yes or no because i want a baby again too.
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replied April 1st, 2012
I'm 15 and had an abortion in August. I was forced into it by my mother. My boyfriend, who I've been with for almost a year now, was thrilled at the idea of having a son/daughter. I've been going through the same exact emotions as you are. I wish I could have my daughter/son back. I want you to know that you aren't alone and that you have to chose what is right. My boyfriend wants to have another one as soon as possible. May I add that he is almost 18 as well. He's joining the marines this summer.
You have to decide for yourself and those who truly care about your happiness will support you through it. I believe God throws you curve balls just to test your strength. Just decide what you want and go for it. No one can decide but you.
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replied April 2nd, 2012
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i cant beleive any parent would force their child to have a abortion, i have a daughter, an if she got preg at a young age, ild sit her down an tell her how it is. an let her make the choice but tell her i wont be raising it so she can go parties an stuff, im sorry for all that have had to have one an didnt get a say or felt it was right but was sad after, no one should have to go through that, i never have.
if you feel ready to have one then go for it, they are the most wonderfulest gifts in the world, i have a boy an girl an mab another i dont no yet to early (im 24) my parents dont approve of my boyfriend but its not up to them. so if u feel like ur ready then do it.
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