Medical Questions > Mental Health > Anxiety and Stress Forum

unreasonable fear of death (Page 1)

Must Read
Learn how doctors clinically diagnose one of twelve kinds of anxiety disorders...and which doctors you should see for an anxiety diagnosis....
Anxiety disorders can affect anyone. But do you know the common signs and symptoms of anxiety disorders? Learn more now....
Anxiety is a normal, healthy emotion when experienced during specific moments. But do you know the signs that anxiety has gotten out of control? Read more here...
hey everyone,
I just now joined, but i have a problem and it scares me. okay, i'm young(ill be 20 in like 2 weeks). For the last 8 or 9 months i have been having nightmares and daydreams EVERYDAY about either me, my boyfriend or my dad dying. the 3 most important people in my life! i cry 1-2 times a day over it. i stay stressed, uptight and overprotective about it. i have been with my boyfriend for going on two years and we live together, i can talk to him about anything. but not this. i dont know what is wrong with me but it is uncontrollable and every single time it comes into mind i get paranoid and then i think that im supposed to know something and then i think no, something will happen and i was supposed to do something about it because i had warnings and so on. i just can't handle it anymore; i dont think i have anymore tears left. i try to keep myself busy but that doesn't even work my mind has forced me to imagine every death possible. i have a happy life, i just dont understand. i am now considering counseling but i need advice first. but, coverears as you can tell once again it has kept me up because it is 4:11a.m. and everytime i have these "dreams" i always find myself hoping that i will be the one to die before either of them because i couldn't handle another death in my life. so, ANYBODY please please give me advice, anything. thank you for listening it's appreciated :]
Did you find this post helpful?
First Helper furrytail
|

replied January 4th, 2009
you should deffinatly see a oouncler if you dont want to tell your boyfrined your dream just tell him you want to see a councler and mabey after time you will be able to tell him..its so important to talk to someone
|
Did you find this post helpful?

This post has been removed because it did not meet our Community Guidelines.

replied January 4th, 2009
i should probably mention that this was not a suicide note or anything i definitely don't think about suicide. i just want these dreams/imaginations stopped. and it is not from drugs, i do not do ANY drugs nor do i drink. (i smoke cigarettes) but that's it. same with my boyfriend he has never done drugs either and does not drink. i think it may have something to do with the amount of people that i have lost in my life that i was close to. sometimes i feel that i need to leave my boyfriend just because i dont want anything bad to happen to him..
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied January 4th, 2009
Especially eHealthy
I do think you should seek counciling, but not because you might have a suicide risk. Not at all. It's normal to feel anxiety when thinking about the death of self or a loved one, but not at this degree. Perhaps a professional can help you discover why you're fixating on this and a healthy way to deal with these issues as they arise. I wish you luck.
|
Did you find this post helpful?
Users who thank AyaMiyaki for this post: furrytail  user154304 

replied January 4th, 2009
Experienced User
I agree with AyaMiyaki,
Seek some councilling. This is not to say that we worry about you pondering suicide or the like, but the fact that you are 'obsessed' with worry about the deaths of loved ones to the point where it is taking over your life and taking up much of you time is something that needs to be addressed. Councillers can help you to come to terms with what the deep rooted issue or concern is within you that is manifesting itself in the form of these fears and hopefully such discussions will help you handle these thoughts and put them in the right perspective.
Seek some professional assistance and good luck,

Wendy
|
Did you find this post helpful?
Users who thank furrytail for this post: user154304 

replied January 4th, 2009
thank you guys:)
and no i dont think any of you are trying to tell me i am suicidal.
no offenses taken, i appreciate the advice.(:
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 4th, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
hey hun yeh i agree with the others you should talk to someone about these dreams, i had a brief spell of the same bad dream happening and it sort of destroyed my life for a little while anyway until i talked about it and they eventually stopped hope you sort it out Jenny
|
Did you find this post helpful?
Users who thank J3nnyuk for this post: user154304 

replied January 5th, 2009
Hello
Hey, i have given allot of thought to what you have said. And i am sure this will help. My girl had the same problem when she turned 20, she had bad dreams, crying and feeling that something bad will happen - also feeling terrible and that she will die. So we went to seek help - and she talked to a doctor about this - and i think you should do the same. Thing is, that it's common - the doctor said ! When you change the prefix of your age from 19 to 20 or 29 to 30 - you realize that you grow older and especially when you turn 20 it's the first time when you realize that.(it could have not happened from age 9 to 10 - too young Smile ) So it's nothing to worry about and to be stressed about. It relates to anyone you care about and that you love - in your subconscious you understand that everyone will go older, and older as we get we will die at some point. I would be sad too - thinking of it - but LIFE it's so much more than thinking about bad things that could happen. I think LIVING is: coming to terms with the fact that we will all die, I will die, my family - friends - people writing stuff on internet, presidents - you name it - will die. No one can know for sure when or how - could it be today or by natural causes in 50+ years. I know we are not here for nothing - but if you have the chance to have a beautiful, normal life with your friends - loved ones - family - even for a short while - then it's WORTH living and sharing with them! Think that there are people that have no one - or that are badly sick and they have to accept it, people that could tell you how happy you are. I am not telling you what to do - i don't have that right, but my girl is not having the nightmares anymore,she's now 24, and she's happy. It's just life... why be afraid when you can live it! Cheer up, and prepare for your BIRTHDAY! Bless you! Mihai.
|
Did you find this post helpful?
Users who thank HelpYou for this post: furrytail  user154304  saz19 

replied January 5th, 2009
Experienced User
I wanted to thank HelpYou for this very insightful and kind reply.

Wendy
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 5th, 2009
HELPYOU-
HELPYOU--thank you so much for taking the time to write all of that:) you have helped me realize some stuff that i am was not thinking about. i appreciate it a lot! im glad your daughter is living a happy life now! bless you[:
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 6th, 2009
:)
Thank you as well - i am just happy to help if i can. I am glad you chose to write about this - instead of not saying anything at all. Smile Wishing you all the best!

Mihai.


Thank you Furrytail.Smile
|
Did you find this post helpful?
Users who thank HelpYou for this post: user154304 

User Profile
replied January 8th, 2009
HelpYou iWuvYou
im soooooooooooooooooooo enlightened right now... just got the case same as yours ripcity... i am 22 and ill be a dad on Feb... stuff like this i often think of my future... it just so happen i have sleeping disorders... i suddenly woke up after a 2 hour sleep... intervals between 1am 3am to 5am... it seems like i did not have enough sleep... but when i stumble to this forum... as i saw what u wrote HelpYou... i wanna thank you... i realize that my fear is reality...w/c is normal to people... and suddenly i imagine the face and the hands of my daughter to be in a month... and it feels soooo goood that im back on track... thanks to you... my advice to you ripcity... i know for us now the hard part is acceptance... but theres nothing to worry about... God will help us... just pray dearly everyday...ok? Good luck to you! sori for the wrong grammar..^_^ peace
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 8th, 2009
I have the same feeling
I called my doctor and I spoke to the nurse she told me to go back on medication and if I feel like hurting my self to go to the ER,I told her the reason why Im calling was because I dont want to die ,Im afraid of any of my family get hurt or die.
I dont want to kill my self. why do I have this feeling ,I know eventually we all get older and we have to die but I have this keeps bothering me and I afraid all the time ,sometimes Im not even hungry and I try to puhs my self but I want to be and not the medicine acting for me is this worted?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 10th, 2009
I don't mean to be funny when I say this, but I think you need a hug. A virtual hug, so here it is>

virtual hug away..

Fear of dying, of the unknown, of tomorrow, of the sky falling down on you...these are kinda unescapable things, I think it's probably how you're identifing something thats got the squeeze on you, you're projecting your unknown fear into a fear you can recognise, without really understanding it. Everyone is afraid, possibly even terrified of dying. Of the unknown, but it's gonna happen. It's one of the most important things in life you absolutely have to accept. Theres more important things to worry about, like is the car clean, do the leaves on that tree look okay to you to? Really, theres a few things, that worry all of us on a daily basis. You need to find a way to understand and accept them. Other things, like what is really making you feel like this.. thats the real puzzle. You need to find yourself a safe place, somewhere you can think and work stuff out. It could be you did something wrong, are afraid someone might find out and this is build up anxiety, making you all stressed. It could be you've forgotten to do something, or you've mislaid something you thought was important, it could be the new year or something someone said. It'll come to you. Don't fear it. And definately don't fear the reaper. There's no escaping that, I actually think it might be fun, an adventure..Not exactly one I'm packing for or wanting to go on soon right enough.. but I don't think it's really anything more to worry over, than when my next bill is coming or will have enough money to put petrol in the car to get to work to pay yet more bills. Here..
Have another hug. Smile
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 11th, 2009
Experienced User
Wendy sends all of you a great big virutal HUG
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 25th, 2009
THANKKS:]
Thanks everybody for all of you're good advice and [[virtual hugs]] lol it's appreciated. after i read what helpyou had to say about her daughter going through the same thing, i stopped having the dreams..and i was so relieved it never crossed my mind again [that's why i stopped getting on here, i thought if i kept reading this over & over that they would never go away] well, they did go away...until last night. i had another dream and it has been eating at me all day and a part of me think that i had this dream again because i just put it aside in the first place. like i never really dealt with it. but another part of me thinks that i had it because i am horribly sick right now and i haven't been out of bed in 3 days & i have been asleep most of that time so i think i have given my mind to much time to wonder. well, i just wanted to say sorry for up and leaving you lovely people who were still responding to this post:/ godbless Cool
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 26th, 2009
Experienced User
We are always here to help...
You certainly do not have to apologize for "leaving us in the post". What is most important is that all of us, combining our various backgrounds, experiences and feeling are here to help one another and please always feel free to come to us anytime and use us as a sounding board for your issues and concerns.

Wendy
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied February 2nd, 2009
:)
thank you Wendy!:]
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied February 20th, 2009
Hello
I have the same feelings I'm always scared, I cant even life my life I don't know what to do, it is worse since my grandma just died a week ago what is the purpose of life, and why do we have to die.
|
Did you find this post helpful?
12