Medical Questions > Mental Health > Addiction, Recovery Forum

Trying to kick heroin myself, should I try rehab?

My boyfriend and I have been together many years, but started using opiates recreationally about 2 years ago. Long story short, we immediately were hooked and have been ever since. First it was opanas, roxis, oxys, now its heroin (almost a bundle a day each). We've attempted to kick many times but never made it more than 1 day. Now we're facing drug charges and our families have found out (we had managed to keep it from them) and we need to be done. We've wanted to be clean for awhile now, the fun ended a LONG time ago, but we just didn't have the willpower.

After trying to get on a few suboxone clinics with no luck ( they want to put us on methadone, which is NOT happening. i've heard that's harder to kick than heroin itself), we found a friend who has subutex and started using that. We're now on day 4 and while the physical symptoms are fading, my mental state is far from okay. I wake up early in the morning before the alarm and all I can think about it using (that was my reason to get out of bed, to do my morning bag) . I can't sleep without heavy medication, I think about using ALL day, everywhere I go. i'm horribly depressed, I cry all day long and sometimes think about suicide. My boyfriend really has been great, he's pushed me this far (if it wasn't for him i'd have given up on day 1)and says he'll push me the whole way if he needs to but I need professional help.

I want to go to rehab and get myself straight. But there are a few problems. #1 - We have a full time job (at the same place) that will fire us as soon as we mention needed AT LEAST 30 days off. Going to rehab would mean losing a great paying job I've been at for almost 3 years and being jobless in a horrible job market.
#2 He won't go. He says he really needs the money for his lawyers and other things he's behind on. But I just can't go off and worry constantly about whether he's okay, if he's still clean or if he's using. We haven't slept apart a night in 2 years. And God Forbid he does relapse, when I get out I'd have to stay away. He's the man I'm going to marry and I can't have that. I want him to do this with me, but I feel there is no convincing him.

I just need some advice. He suggested going to see a psychiatrist but I don't believe my insurance covers any, and I heard they won't medicate you if you are on Subutex/Suboxone that's not prescribed by a doctor.
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replied February 24th, 2012
Going into treatment may be the best thing for you at this moment. Quiting opiates is extremely difficult. Not only are the physical withdrawl issues very tough but the mental ones are just as bad. As you're realizing.

Working with some professionals who are knowledgeable about how to help those in your current condition will not guarantee that you stay clean forever but will certainly raise your chances.

Do you have insurance with your current employer? I believe all state laws require employers to give you medical leave if a doctor prescribes it. And the reason does not need to be revealed.

Stepping into treatment may also help you with your legal troubles as it is a clear signal that you're attempting to get your life back in order.

Stick with it and good luck.
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replied March 21st, 2012
Listen, methadone and suboxone can save lives. Nothing wrong with being on a 90 day or six month program to get you're feet under you. I myself was told I couldn't do it on my own without methadone or suboxone, I didn't have health insurance at the time so I couldn't get on it. Therapy along side a 12 step program can work wonders
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replied March 21st, 2012
Listen, methadone and suboxone can save lives. Nothing wrong with being on a 90 day or six month program to get you're feet under you. I myself was told I couldn't do it on my own without methadone or suboxone, I didn't have health insurance at the time so I couldn't get on it. Therapy along side a 12 step program can work wonders
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replied March 21st, 2012
Oh yeah, treatment would probably be vital if you aren't going the maintainance medication route
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replied March 21st, 2012
A lot of the symptoms that you described are post acute withdrawals. You'll probably have them worse from methedone. You're job cannot fire you for going to treatment, addiction is a considered a disease. If they fired you for it, they would be in a lot of legal trouble. Plus if you go back to heroine, you will lose your job eventually
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