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Letting Your Teenager Drink (Page 1)

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How do you feel about giving your underage child an alcoholic beverage? Obviously not your 12 year old, but what about your 16-17 year old?






Fyi, here in the us the legal drinking age is 21.

I believe the legal drinking age in the uk is 18.
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replied June 29th, 2007
Supporter
Yep the legal drinking age here in the uk is 18. i already posted my opinion in the other post but anyhow here it is again. My parents let me and my sister try their drinks, only a sip or two though when we were younger and then when they knew that we were capeable of getting alcohol outside of the house one way or another they let us drink at home, not giving us a bottle of vodka and saying 'enjoy', they let us have a glass of wine with diner or a beer or cider in the garden when we had a bbq. My parents always said that they would much prefer us to drink at home so then they can stop us when they see appropiate and monitor what we were drinking, we were never ever given enough to get drunk just to clarify
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replied June 29th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
i said in the other one.. im a bit conflicted about this.

first off there is no way in hell id let my 16 year old drink and i cannot stand parents who will let kids that age over to their house to have drinking parties (which happens all the time around where i live)

if someone provided my 16 year old daughter alcohol without my knowledge (or even with)
i would get the law involved

now as far as the us goes, the majority of 18 year olds should not be allowed to drink. most are immature and cant handle the responsibility (lets be hones thats most people in their early 20's as well)

But at the same time, when i was 18 i was married, working, and with my own apartment. i was very mature and responsible and knew what was too much and never allowed myself to get to that point.

i think this could turn into a lower the legal drinking age debate.
my parents when i was over the age of 18 didn't mid if i drank at their house (for social functions)
like i said i was also married and with my own place and in the us you are considered a legal adult at the age of 18.
so like i said im torn.
never before they are 18 but after that i dont think parents have much control over their children if they are independent.
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replied June 29th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
allowing your children to drink is allowing them to break the law. you're telling them that rules don't matter and that they don't apply to them.

my uncle used to buy alcohol for all his kids when they were teenagers and it really bothered me. what made it worse was that he was/is a cop!
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replied June 29th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
It's illegal and it's wrong.
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replied June 29th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
I got drunk for the first time at a cousin's wedding when I was 13. My parents were there and they let me. I got trashed and threw up all night b/c I didn't know how to drink and I drank too much, too fast. I believe that I was too young and I don't know what the heck my parent's were thinking.
My husband has been drinking since he was about 13 also. It was at their house with his twin brother and cousins and their parents allowed it. Pretty much from that wedding I've been drinking. When Jesse and I got together I started drinking with him and his cousin and his brother. It was pretty much every weekend or every other weekend. As we got older we invited friends and we'd have our weekly parties in the pool room. We were drunk often. I thought it was okay at the time b/c we were at his mom's house and we didn't drive.

Our parents are/were very relaxed parents and his mother didn't set any rules. Jesse's whole family drinks regularly, so it was okay to them.

I think we were too young and I wouldn't let my children drink that young. I would let them have a drink if they were 16 or so and I thought they were responsible enough.
I will raise my children to be responsible and know right from wrong. I will trust that I did my best and they will make the right decisions when the time comes. Whether I give it to them in the privacy of my own home on *rare* occasions or they go out and drink it, they're still drinking. If you restrict it, they'll drink behind your back and that could be dangerous.
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replied June 29th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
I am very against it. I had friends parents who did buy alcohol and I honestly didn't have respect for them. I had one parent who would give us cigarettes. I thought it was "cool" at the time because I didn't have to beg for cigarettes (I don't smoke now) but I honestly felt that these parents were trying to be friends and be "cool" instead of being responsible parents.
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replied June 29th, 2007
Experienced User
Most parents have the thought in there head that if they let there child drink at home their there to supervise and at least they no where there child is ....i however do not agree with this and would never allow my daughter to do this ....i try too instill good morals in my daughter and breaking the law isnt one of them....is it ok too let your child do a line of cocaine in the home as well just cause your there too take care of them ....i know cocaine and alchohol are different substances but techniquely its the same thing regardless you are letting your child do something wrong
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replied June 29th, 2007
Experienced User
I don't think that teens should be drinking, but I would also rather them drink under my supervision rather than at a friends or out in the woods some where. I am sure that if some thing serious happened the other teens that would be around would be too afraid to call for help. Its one of those double sided subjects.
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replied June 29th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
I myself am torn as well.

When I was 16 almost 17, my parents let me have 1 beer while we were at home because my sisters and brother who were older were allowed to have drinks at the house. So they said I could have just one. My older siblings held me to that and when i wanted another, they wouldn't let me.
I had a lot of friends who's parents would let them have parties and go and get them alcohol...well usually it was an older sibling, but the parents still allowed it. My mom never really knew about that, but the few times she did find out about it she was pissed.
But....when I went to college and was in my sophmore year so...19/20 or so, my mom used to regularly take me to the grocery store and stock me up with wine and beer for my apartment. I could easily have gotten the neighbor to do it, but hey mom was willing to pay for it. I don't have any idea why she was ok with this... I still can't figure that out.
As far as I am concerned, I will not be planning on providing my child with alcohol. I think that if they are 20 going on 21 that is a different story, but anything younger than 20 I think it is sending the wrong message.
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replied June 29th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
What about the health risks? Alcohol is a drug that effects the body negatively... I would be more worried about the health risks than the legal ones.
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replied June 29th, 2007
Experienced User
i've been aloud to drink since i moved in with my dad when i was 12... not outside of the home but inside if there was available alcohol in the house. i do not drink and have never enjoyed it, i also can't seem to get drunk no matter how much i have so i see no point in dealing with the nasty taste with no outcome.
my fiance' was aloud to drink at about the same age with the same circumstances in mind, he also can't seem to get drunk but he does enjoy an alcoholic beverage occasionally... so i think we'll do the same thing with our children. hopefully our children will end up like us not being able to get drunk and not enjoying it because of that.
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replied June 29th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Almost everything can be done in moderation and not cause harm. Wine can reduce some heart risks.

Personally, I know that in Germany it used to be true that a person of any age can drink. Same thing in France.

I know alcohol was a mysterious thing, but I think I just didn't have a huge urge to disobey and try out mysterious things like many teens do, mostly out of fear from my parents. I did smoke a cigarette once, but felt so guilty that I confessed three days later. Turns out my dad knew, and he was just watching me stew in my own guilt lol.

My parents let me try some alcohol when I was about 16. I don't have a like for the harder stuff, it tastes horrible to me. To this day I don't drink much.
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replied June 29th, 2007
Active User, very eHealthy
I dont see it as a big deal to be honest. Its only a drink with a calming relaxing happy effect isnt it?
As long as its in moderation like with most things, it isnt going to harm you health wise?

I'll let jay drink from the time he becomes a teenager at 13.
Just a beer or something any evening he wants.
I'll have a limit to how much he's allowed daily. 1 beer or glass of wine a day or....im not sure.
Once hes 16 it will be the same limit rule for weekdays, but on the weekends he can drink as much as he wants indoors or out with friends.

Once they reach 16, they are going to do it anyway, whether you know about it or not. Seems ok to me. But no one else on here has the same opinion so maybe it isnt Confused
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replied June 29th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
I think teaching respect for alcohol is the key. If your kid just hits a part one day and has no experience, they may die from alcohol poisoning 3 hours later.
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replied June 29th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
I was allowed to drink at quite a young age. I had already shown my maturity. However, I have mixed emotions on weather I will allow my children to drink before 21. I am seriously considering not. While I was responsible enough to handle this (or so I thought) I wasn't pressured to 'experiment' while I was out with friends, because I had already experienced alcohol. However, that didn't stop me from drinking, instead I drank because I liked it. I have only recently (due to ttc) restricted my drinking. And I didn't realize how much I was drinking, until I tried to stop all together.
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replied June 29th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
i also think that europeans and canadians have a much more liberal view of alcohol. that being said, with the younger drinking ages and it not being such an issue, isnt alcoholism and alcohol related death worse in the states?
i wasnt sure about this im just curious?
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replied June 30th, 2007
Active User, very eHealthy
I started drinking when I was around 19 and my mother permitted it. At our house, it was pretty much okay to drink at 18 and I think that was because she thought the drinking age was stupid. But if we were younger than that, she would have flipped.

I don't know about my brothers, but I didn't even try to drink until I was 19. I never drank in high school really or at a young age. It wasn't exciting to me or adventurous. I guess because my parents didn't make a big thing of drinking, either by doing it themselves or by acting like we couldn't get near it.
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replied June 30th, 2007
Active User, very eHealthy
I am absolutely against letting them drink underage. Its illegal! I have had way to many friends whos parents feel its ok to let them drink. Some say, as long as you drink in the house its ok but having acess to the liquor cabinet at any time of the day is just not the way to teach your child responsible drinking. And what actually stops them from going out to parties and drinking, nothing does. They will drink where ever and they just use the time at home as time for extra drinks. I think you could teach much better 'responsible' drinking habits by simply talking to your child.

I know a family where the parents and kids always drink together. They even allow the kids to invite friends over and they all get drunk. The one daughter had a kid at 15 and still gets drunk with her parents while the kid is off doing god knows what. I think that is one heck of a messed up family and I for one would *never* let me kid do that. I think those parents should be turned into the cops.
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replied July 1st, 2007
Supporter
Eiri wrote:
I think teaching respect for alcohol is the key. If your kid just hits a part one day and has no experience, they may die from alcohol poisoning 3 hours later.

100% agree! My parents didn't want us to drink, we have two alcoholics in the family and they were worried about 'the addictive gene' being passed on to us but they were even more worried about us going out on the street drinking who knows what given to us by who knows who and getting into very bad situations
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replied February 9th, 2012
under age drinking
I believe my ultimate job is to help create adults who are capable of making healthy decisions. I believe alcohol is definitely one of them. I let my girl teen agers drink at home because I want them to learn of their tolerances. I don't want the first time they get drunk to happen when they are away from the home. They could end up with alcohol poisoning, being raped or driving and wrapping theirselves around a tree. I want my kids well equipped for all social situations when they leave my house. America holds alcohol out as a trophy, a rite of passage.I have found that allowing them the freedom to drink, (by the way I am speaking of alcohol under 10% usually even lower like 5% not hard alcohol.) they are learning what they can handle and what they cant.I don't like them drinking out side my house nor do I give alcohol to other kids unless the parent is present and agrees.Italians have allowed wine drinking for the whole family for centuries. There are less alcoholics in Italy then in America.My kids know about alcohol ratios and what drinks can make you very drunk and which ones are weaker. This way here if they end up on a date and someone wants them to get drunk they will have the wisdom to know the difference.As far as legal, I think parents should be allowed to be parents. The Government is not a parent. They have too much control as it is. Shawney
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