Medical Questions > Mental Health > Panic Attacks Forum

Bipolar, Panic Attacks, Or Both?


By the way, I posted this in a couple different forums. I am still searching for the correct diagnosis.

I would like to share with you my recent experiences. Please feel free to comment and give advice or support.

My girlfriend and I met over two months ago. She is 30 years of age and I am 38. By the way, both of us are professionals, she is a school teacher and I am an engineer. Everything just seemed to fall into place when we met. We shared everything and were very open to each other. She even told me how she was hospitalized for over a year for her illness. It never bothered me, because I didn’t notice a thing wrong with her. The illness by the way was couple of years ago and since then she has had a very successful life teaching.

The relationship lasted nearly two months without any problems surfacing. We started getting closer and doing things together with each other’s group of friends. She told her parents and friends about me and people even quoted how she “floated” because she was so happy. We also planned a week vacation, planned to travel together to visit her parents and do many other things.

When my girlfriend noticed the problems resurfacing, she automatically assumed it was because of me. We spent very little time together the last two weeks and the problems are still present. After reading more about this illness, I have learned that good and bad can cause a relapse. Knowing this, one does not know what to change in their life in order to recover.

She knows I treat her very well and am very patience with her. This has caused a lot of stress for me and I was ready to leave her, but this was before I realized how much she means to me and that she maybe only needs help.

We all know hind-sight is 20/20, but when I look back, it is easy for me to see how we caused the problems to resurface. Now it is not so easy to get “back on track”, but thanks to long hours spent searching the internet, I think I have found a great start. I’ve since ordered a few books, with the intention of reading them myself. I also want to let my girlfriend know how special of a person she really is and that many people suffer from this illness.

Every now and then the world can seem like a cruel place, simple tasks for some can lead to crying spells for others; these problems become magnified and sometimes it must feel like you are in a dark room and cannot find the way out.

I want to offer my girlfriend that I go into the darkroom with her and will hold her hand through the entire process in order to find the way out.

By the way, I shared with her that I lost my wife when I was 25. In addition, I explained how I helped my brother with two nervous breakdowns; one early in his life and one later on. I seem to become stronger and wiser after my personal setbacks or tragedies; therefore I wish to let my girlfriend know that I am there for her.

People with this illness must be very shy to admit that there is a problem. I am sure lots of people have been laughed at or even lost people who they thought were genuine, just by trying to open up. Not all of us are built the same. Not all of us can so easily ask for help. I know this from my personal tragedies.

Thanks to all of those people who saw the signals from a person needing help, but was too proud to ask for it. A person who means the world to me needs my help. I will attempt to help her.

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replied April 15th, 2007
You sound like a great person. My boyfriend wasn't so understanding. He left after we had been together for eleven months. I know that sometimes I am not easy to live with and I give him kudos for trying, but it just didn't work out. Thank you for being there for her. I know exactly how she feels! She is extremely lucky to have you. It gives me hope that maybe I can find a partner who will accept me as I am!
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replied April 25th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Does she have bipolar disorder?

I think it is important for you to know that it is not your fault. Yes, many things can cause a relapse, but like any disease, bipolar disorder can just relapse at times. It is not your fault, it is not because of problems in the relationship. If it was, everyone would be bipolar at some time.

The fact is, this just happens. Bipolar disorder will never go away. It can be managed, but never go away. She will need you there to support her. You sound like you are doing a wonderful job. Just realize that you can't take it personally or you will never be happy.

Being in a relationship with someone who has bipolar disorder is hard, just like with any disease. You just have to realize that it is not your fault and be as supportive as possible.
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