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Okay, so i'm bi, and I have a question for both the males and females. If your dating someone thats bi, would you be afraid that someone of the opposite gender will take them from you, just because they like both? I know its probably a weird question, but its been irking me, mainly because my ex broke up with me for this reason.
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replied April 5th, 2007
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insecure people would find it a double threat. unless you are totally committed to someone, the possibility exists that you can lose the other person to someone else. if one of you are bi then it just doubles those odds.

if you are bi, how do you decide if you've chosen the right partner? let's say you are a female that is bi and decide to choose a female partner. a real nice guy comes along, what then? how does a person who is bi decide on one person. doesn't choosing one person defeat the purpose of being bi?
just curious.
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replied May 2nd, 2007
Experienced User
well, there would be a big chance because he/she likes both gender. unlike if you're straight, then you'd just be insecure with the opposite sex.
But don't be insecure. Trust is still important. and if you trust, then there wouldn't be any problem . . .
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replied May 7th, 2007
actually i'm currently writing a paper about this for my Intro. to Lesbian and Gay class at SUNY at Purchase and the topic is Biphobia amoung Heterosexual and homosexuals. There truely is a lot of biphobia amoung these other two sexualities due to the fact they probably do not wanna date somebody who could possibly cheat on them with practically anybody. Both sides have in the past and still do pressure bisexuals into choosing a side do to the fear of such things happening and it is i'm sure something every person worries about when they are in a relationship with a bisexual
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replied May 8th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
I don't see the problem. People freak out and say it's a "double risk" and crap like that. It's so stupid. My fiancee is bisexual, I'm "open". But we both had a monagamous view of dating when we got together three years ago, so there was never an issue. I was never ever worried he'd levae me for a man or a woman. Personally I'd have been angrier if he'd left me for another girl. if he'd left for a guy, well, dudes have parts that I can't supply. But another girl? What does she have that I don't?

I think people need to trust each other. If you're so insecure that you're worried that your lover is going to hop off with someone else of either gender, then you are the person that needs therapy, not them.

If you and a partner have committed to a monagamous relationship - whether it is dating or marriage or the equivalent pact - then you are monagamous, period, and you simply do not look at other men and women. That's what being monagamous is.

Yes, there's cheating that happens sometimes, but from what I've read, that's not even what this topic is about.
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replied May 8th, 2007
Experienced User
I'm with a bi guy also.... i was worried for while but mostly because hes was my first and hes well rather more experienced and his ex partner was the one that got us together in the first place..with intentions of trying for a 3some.. was worried that but.. we sat and talked about it and he said he didnt want that neither did i.. Maybe in the future but not until we were both comfy with each other first. WE did talk about having a 3 some which brought back the old worries but.. then when he noticed i wasnt comfy with it and honestly didnt want to share him.. he agreed it was fine.. But even though it maybe be selfish.. things can be worked out.. if he misses the male parts there are always toys that can be bought without the other person being involved..thats what we did and its totally fun actually and its still just him and i.. we are both totally happy with the choice.. and can still be pretty creative with it....
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replied November 24th, 2010
Ha. A similar thing happened me. I'm also bi and my boyfriend broke up with me because he was afraid I was going to turn lesbian and run off with a woman. Rolling Eyes Don't let it get to you. Insecure people will always find something to worry about... If it wasn't your bisexuality, it would have been not calling her every night or something just as silly.
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