Medical Questions > Pregnancy Forum > Getting Pregnant Forum

Scared, Confused, And Feel Hopeless (Page 1)

Hi everyone,

i'm new on this site and after reading some of the posts it looks like I will be able to get the help and support that I need.
I am 29 and have been with my husband for almost 5 years. Almost that whole time, we have not used any type of contraception. I stopped taking my birth control pills about 6 1/2 years ago. When I was with my ex (of 8 years) we didn't use protection after I stopped the bc pills. Well now I know that I am the problem that I can't have a baby, because I just found out he has 2 kids now.
My husband and I have been ttc for about 5 months now and what I mean by that is I know when I am fertile - I check with opk - and we do the deed every other day around that time and always on the day of ovulation. Still no baby.
Now here is why I decided to post on here today...
I just got back from the ob/gyn and had the talk with her about our efforts in ttc. I told her I have been off bc for almost 6 1/2 years and that there have been no pregnancies. She kept asking me about my sexual habits and then she told me that I probably have endomietriosis or something else and that she wanted me to go see a reproductive endocrinologist. I don't even know what that kind of doctor does. She said that regardless of how long we have been ttc that with as much sex as I have had and as long as I have been off bc I should have been pregnant by now. She did the annual pap and told me to come back to see her in a month.
Well it gets worse... While doing the breast exam, she told me that I had a cyst... And asked if anyone had ever found it before. I had no idea! This I think is what has me so upset right now is that this really scares me. My aunt and my mom had cysts that had to be removed and they nearly lost thier whole breast. I now have to go for a mammogram also.
So i'm going crazy today, trying not to cry to much at work, trying to stay calm and be positive about the whole situation, but it's really hard.
I'm just glad that there are other people out there like me that are having trouble conceiving.
Wow... I just realized I just wrote a book... Sorry! Just needed to vent a little.
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replied February 1st, 2007
Experienced User
Oh honny i'm so sorry your day was so bad. First of all a welcome. I don't know how much help i'll be since i've never gone to that kind of a doctor but I do know that they do a bunch of tests to see what is going on and they are the ones who will be able to help you with in-vitro and that sort of thing. Good luck with the mamogram! We are here for you!

Amber nicole
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replied February 1st, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
Thank You
Thanks for replying. I have just been an emothional reck today. It's good to know that people understand. I just want to be a mamma so bad it hurt sometimes.
I am kinda scared to go the route of an infertility doctor because I hate going to doctors and I wouldn't look forward to them doing lots of tests.
I get upset thinking that I am the only one in my family that doesn't have kids. I have 12 1st cousins on my mom's side and every single last one of them have kids. My mom said that endomietriosis runs in the family and that two of my cousins had it and they both have two kids. Infertility doesn't run in my family, actually everyone else is rather fertile.

Does anyone know what the chances of getting pregnant are if you have endomietriosis? Also what exactly is it?

Thanks for your help
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replied February 1st, 2007
Experienced User
Do you have any symptoms of anything being wrong? I wouldn't get to hung up on the endometriosis until you have a firm diagnosis. There are many people who have difficulties ttc. Seeing an re is an excellent idea. They can help treat you if you need treatment and specialize in that sort of thing. I have pcos and had difficulty get pregnant with my daughter and we are now trying to conceive #2.

How long are you cycles and are they regular?

Try not to stress (i know, easier said than done) to much. That can mess up your cycles.

As for the cyst, I hope it is something that can be removed easily.
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replied February 1st, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Re: Thank You
*star* wrote:
does anyone know what the chances of getting pregnant are if you have endomietriosis? Also what exactly is it?


Thanks for your help
i'm sorry to hear about your problem star.I foud this link for you,maybe it will help? I hope it does!

Http://www.Endometriosis.Org/
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replied February 1st, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
.
Well I think I do have some symptoms. I asked my mom the other day if endomietriosis runs in the family and she said that she has it and two of my cousins have it... But they both have two kids.
My cycles are semi regular. They are on average 26 days. Sometimes its 25 and sometimes its 27. In fact they have been flip flopping every moth between the two for the past 6 months.
When my period comes, I have the most horrible cramps imaginable...Or so I think. They last for about 2 days. I usually down about 15 advil durring the day. The doctor gave me ponstil, but that didn't work. The doctor I went to today, gave me a rx for motrin 800, so hopefully that will help out.
Aslo, it seems like I get mild cramps from around the time I ovulate until I start af.
I went on google and did a search of the symptoms and most of them sounded like mine.

How long were you ttc with your daughter, and how did you finally become pregnant?

Thanks for your positive thinking, I really need it right now. My mom is away on vacation so I can't talk to her about it.
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replied February 1st, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
Re: Thank You
melissa_20 wrote:
*star* wrote:
does anyone know what the chances of getting pregnant are if you have endomietriosis? Also what exactly is it?



Thanks for your help
i'm sorry to hear about your problem star.I foud this link for you,maybe it will help? I hope it does!


Http://www.Endometriosis.Org/


thank you for finding that... It looks like a good site. I will have to really read it when I get home from work.
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replied February 1st, 2007
Experienced User
Hello
I hope everything goes ok for you but have you tryed ovelex I havent tryed it or anything but there are some girl here that tryed it and they got a good resalt from it they have been shown up latlly but hopeful you can meet them ! But just one advice from a little sis try not to stress I now its hard but half of the health problems go away if you are relexed and happy . I am not saying you are not happy but try to be mind peicful . And I bet its real hard to find out that your husband has two kids.
But try to take the sistuation as easy as possibel . And aslo a good thing to do to make you less stress ful is exerciseing I am giveing you advices but trust me half of them I havent done. I have been ttc for 1year but this is my second year that I am married . You know exersice has a big role in ttc and health probelems good luck sweety and I wish you best of look

baby dust to everyone

sara
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replied February 1st, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
Re: Hello
sara** wrote:
and I bet its real hard to find out that your husband has two kids.

Sara


hi sara,

my husband doesn't have any kids, my ex does. So that's why I was saying that it is me and probably not my husband.

I have already started to treat my body better. I have quit smoking, quit caffine almost totally. I still have a diet coke now and then, but that's better to the 3 or more cups of ledded coffee that I was drinking. And I have cut back significantly on my alcohol consumption. I usually only drink wine and ususally about a half a glass 3 times a week. I used to drink a whole lot more, and I was smoking almost a pack a day. I need to start exercising more, I stopped going to the gym when I moved, but before I left, I lost almost 15 pounds. I think I have gained most of it back though.

** please send all the baby dust possible**
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replied February 1st, 2007
Active User, very eHealthy
Here's lots of baby dust your way...

My parents took six years to have a baby and then had four kids in five years. They weren't even trying to get pregnant after the first. It just happened. I'm not sure what did it. I know my mom took daily hormone pills, but that could have been related to the histerectomy she had after the fourth kid.

Are you traking your bbt, too? I read that you can get an lh surge and then not ovulate. The only way to know you ovulated is to check your temperature.

I think going to a specialist is an exciting thing. It can give you some certainty. Plus, their job is to get you pregnant!
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replied February 2nd, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
More Questions
No I haven't tried to to the temperature thing. I was thinking about it, but I know how I was when I was on the pill and trying to remember taking it everyday. I would probably forget to take my temp before I got out of bed each day.
I am still kinda interested in what might happen the first time I go to the specialist? Will they want to see both of us, or just me first? My husband has a hard time getting off work right now, so that might make it hard. Also, I am pretty sure my insurance will not cover this, so I was wondering if anyone knows how much something like that would cost... I mean as far as the initial consult, maybe taking clomid and anything else that anyone may know about.

Thanks!!!
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replied February 2nd, 2007
Experienced User
Star - even though it felt like we had been trying forever, it was only about a year and a half. Then I had a miscarriage so it was closer to two years with my daughter. We are going on just over a year for baby number two. The only thing that is better this time is I have a diagnosis for what is wrong and we are working on treating it. The first time around we had no idea what the problem was. I do the whole temperature charting thing. At first I wasn't so fond of it but I swear it has become an addiction. Plus, I feel like I at least know what is going on. I can tell from my chart if I have ovulated and what is going on each cycle. Plus, my doctor encourages me to chart because she get a lot of good information from them also. For my first infertility visit, I went by myself. At that time, my husband was uncomfortable with the whole thing. He thought the problem might be him and that freaked him out a bit. Once they tested him and he was fine then he started coming with me. I have read that depending on the way the specialist codes the doctor visit your insurance may cover it. You should ask them when you make the appointment.
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replied February 2nd, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
abbysmom wrote:
I feel like I at least know what is going on. I can tell from my chart if I have ovulated and what is going on each cycle. Plus, my doctor encourages me to chart because she get a lot of good information from them also.


i was wondering if when you do chart your temps don't you only see when you have already ovulated? Isn't it to late by then?

I also had a question as to why the doctor would want to see me again in a month? Why would that be?

How old are you abbysmom if you don't mind me asking
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replied February 2nd, 2007
Active User, very eHealthy
I take the temp before I get out of bed in the morning. At first, it took a while to remember, but i'm in my second month and i'm really good about it now . My husband and I get up at the same time in the morning and usually snooze the alarm once. I take my temp while we're snoozing.

The bbt does only tell you after you've ovulated, but it is a good guide to tell you the day you ovulated. I take the opk as well hoping that it will tell me ahead of time. I think cm is the best early indicator. You're cm will change consistency before you get the lh surge. It took me a few months of paying attention to recognize the cm changes.
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replied February 3rd, 2007
Experienced User
Star, good luck with every thing. Hope you get some answers soon.

I am sending you thousand of good luck & baby dust your way. Hugs hugs
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replied February 3rd, 2007
Experienced User
Shortgeek is correct. You only get confirmation of ovulation after the fact and ewcm is your best indicator. I like the charting because after a while, I start to see a pattern and kind of know what to expect. Plus, it is nice to know for sure that you have ovulated. You can get positive opks and not actually ovulate so temping makes me feel better. I am 32. I keep telling my husband that we need to hurry up because my eggs are getting old! Your doctor probably wants to see you to try to confirm a diagnosis for you and decide if you need any treatment for endometriosis and if you will need any assistance with trying to conceive. I know it can be scary so I suggest you do some research on the internet and check out lots of message boards with a trying to conceive sections. You can get lots of info that way. Just be cautious. Not everythng you read will be accurate.
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replied February 5th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
Thank You Girls!
Thanks for the info on temp taking. Where can I get one of the thermometers? Do they come with a chart or do you make your own.
Af started yesterday, so here's to another month of trying.
I looked at my health insurance and found out that the reproductive endocrinologist that my ob/gyn refered me to is not covered by my insurance. They do have a few doctors that are under the specialist section in the book, but they say endocrinology and metabolism? Do you think this might be the same kind of doctor? I am going to call my doctor to see if they are, but I was just wondering if anyone on here knew.

Thanks again for your support, and please please send all the baby dust you can... And keep it coming.
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replied February 5th, 2007
Experienced User
I'm sorry to hear that your af came. I ordered my thermometer of off the internet but I think you can buy them just about anywhere. I am living in spain right now so I didn't have many options. I chart on a website called fertilityfriend. You can chart for free or you can pay and get vip privileges. You could probably also download paper versions off of the net for free.
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replied February 6th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
abbysmom wrote:
i'm sorry to hear that your af come. I ordered my thermometer of off the internet but I think you can buy them just about anywhere. I am living in spain right now so I didn't have many options. I chart on a website called fertilityfriend. You can chart for free or you can pay and get vip privileges. You could probably also download paper versions off of the net for free.


thanks abbysmom. I will look into it today.
Wow, spain must be really nice. I would love to go there someday
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replied February 6th, 2007
Experienced User
I think that there are many parts of spain that would be nice to visit but the area where we live isn't so hot. We have gotten used to it but we don't recommend our area to others.
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