Ok well yesterday I was doing really well I didn't purge I was so happy :d but today I did and now I don't know if i'll ever be able to just stop it sounds so easy just stop I wish I could. Sorry just needed to get that off my chest(well the little bit I have Laughing). I think its not purging you have to stop its having no control over how much you eat. I have to learn to say no regardless if i'm under weight or not. I'm kind of excited because I want to lose some more weight and I love the satisfaction it gives you.Is that weird that I like it so much? Does anyone wanna write back to get something off their chest, i;m here. :d
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replied January 30th, 2004
Hey I no exactly wat you mean. I love when the number on the scales has gone down even if it is only a little bit. And I also no wat you mean about the purging, like, if you didnt overeat in the first place then you dont need to vomit? I have like a certain number of calaries im allowed each day, and if I go over the number even a little bit, then I go into a frenzy! I hav a question tho, when u purge, do you hav to keep on going till you get everything up? And how do you no when you hav? I understand where your coming from tho. Haha soz if this is boring but im new at it!
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replied January 31st, 2004
Advanced Support Team
So u recently started binging and purging stace????
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replied January 31st, 2004
I did yes, but every time I purge it just keeps getting harder to do, so I have turned to laxatives aswell. I no wat im doing is wrong and disgusting, but I like to think I control my eating more than I binge. Its really weird to be telling ppl this!
P.S the baby is very cute!!!
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replied January 31st, 2004
Experienced User
Hey well this might sound completely disusting but when I purge I can taste what I am throwing up so I know what i'm getting rid of but I don't get rid of everything I don't eat enough to do that. How long have you been doing this?
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replied January 31st, 2004
I hav always been worried about my weight- as young as 9-10. I am now nearly 16 (in a week- yay) and hav been bingeing and purging/taking laxatives for afew months now. I h8t doing it but sometimes I cant stop myself. I dont think I will ever want to stop losing weight tho. No, I understand wat you mean... I just thought I was weak or something for not being able to bring everything up... I cant believe im telling someone I dont even no bout this! Noone else knows.
Im actually not really excited bout my b'day cos I no it means going out to dinna with my family and friends.. I dont think I can do it.... Omg that is so pathetic! I can binge at home and vomit it up but I cant let my family/friends see me eat! Am I crazy? Sometimes I feel it.
But anyway enough about me, tell me more bout yourself...
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replied January 31st, 2004
Experienced User
Hey well i'm 16 and I have been concious of my weight for as long as I can remeber I only started doing something about it when I was about 13/14. I can totaly understand you I think I will always want to lose weight it is something that has always been there, it doesn't help when your mam is thin and goes to the gym all the time. I never told anyone about my eating habits untill last september I was talking to my favorite teacher and we just got chatting about stuff and I told her,that was both the biggest mistake I have made and the best because she is there for me to talk now so I don't feel so alone but she also told my parents, I know I was so pissed off but I managed to convience them that she was over reacting and there is nothing to worry about. I found christmas really hard did you? I thought I waould never back to school were I didn't have to eat or have people watching me. I hate the weekend because we usually order in and I just don't want to eat so I am always trying to make execuses but I and up eating more then any of them and then spend the next hour purging.It sucks. What do you find the hardest? Do you think you will ever want to get help? I don't know if I will.Do laxatives really work?Write back soon Smile
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replied January 31st, 2004
Yeah xmas was hard but I was kind of looking forward to school and the routine u'no? We also usually get takeaway on the weekend and yeah it does suck...Especially when my brothers can eat like a whole pizza and still not put on weight!! No, I dont think I want to get help.. Wat ur going thru is why! I would h8t for ppl to interfere. Its like, none of their business u no? And I actually dont think I need help... Besides the purging and laxatives. (which I dont think work...Only in the short term anyway. But dont do it! I dont want to be influencing others, I couldnt stand knowing im doing it to someone else!!)
anyways how did you go today? Hav u seen a counsellor? Are u embarrassed? Haha sorry for the 21 questions!! Xoxo
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replied February 1st, 2004
Experienced User
Its ok I have been purging for over a month now and I have had this eating thing for over a year so don't worry you won't infleunce me in a bad way. I won't go and get any laxatives I hate tablets I never take them. Why did you start using them and purging?No I haven't seen a concellor and I hope I never will. I know that purging doesn't work I have just put on weight instead of losing it but I have started my old ways again, not eating and no purging its perfect, I will lose weight and not be doing so much damage like when you purge. I think you do need help because purging and laxative abuse is so dangerous do you really want to suffer the consequences of this when your older and can't have kids along with the million other thing s that can happen the most exteme being death and I know you might think your invencable because thats how I feel but we're not and well find out that we're not when its too late. I know i'm saying this to you and there I am trying to lose weight but I just thought I should say it maybe you will listen, maybe you are stronger than me and realize this isn't living its not what life is about there is so much more and because you are so tied up with this you can't see it. Please don't forget you have a life to live don't you have plans for the future, places you want to see people you want to meet things you want to avhieve are you really going to let this get in the way of your life , its just not worth that.
You said you eat alot and thats why you purge well couldn't you try to eat just 3 meals a day they don't have to be big or anything I know it is hard believe me I know. Purging will get you no where it will only hurt you. You know the way you don't want your parents to know well what if you collapased or chocked on your own vomit what would you do? They would find out and when you start experiencing the effects of purging they will find out there's no way you can hide it. I am so scared because I have to go to the denists in a few weeks and I have wreched my teeth from purging, I don't know what i'm going to do because they will say it to my parents and then it won't be my secret anymore they'll know and try to fix me. Wouldn't you feel better about yourself if you got better before they found out. Please don't let this ruin your life, all you can to is try you can't except anymore from yourself just try.
I'm sorry for saying all this when i'm not a great role model for it, if everyone could just get better that easliy there would be now chat room for people with e/ds. Do you really want to become another satistic someone who wasted their life, I know you don't because are smarter then that and derserve to live a happy life.
Wow that was long now after all that you have to try my hand is killing me. Laughing please write back and tell me ehat you think about what I said, and I swear I won't go on about it again if you don't want me to. We can just chat about stuff your the only 16 year old I have seen on this forum. Write back soon Smile
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