Hello,

i dated my ex-girlfriend for exactly 2 years before she broke it off. However, before that she/we made the decision to move across the street from me and 2 weeks later it was over! Then 2 weeks after that she starts seriously dating someone else. All of this has been very hard to understand for me. This spring everything I did was never good enough and she was always angry or irritated with me. All of this drove me to the point where I thought I could never make her happy and I was also frustrated. I am a very patient person and thought she needed time to think and asked her if she wanted to take some time to herself. I of course did not want to see that but wanted her to figure out what she wanted. As soon as I stated that she made her mind up and it was over for her. Early in our relationship she had told me that she was diagnosed with bipolar by two doctors, however, a third doctor stated she had been mis-diagnosed. Her sister, who she is very close with and everyone else cannot understand what she is doing and believe that she needs to be on medication. Whether or not they are letting her know this or she will not listen I am not sure. I always thought that she was just emotional but looking back at her moods I "believe" that it was more than that. I am not trying to justify the relationship but searching for an understanding. At one time she wants to by a cabin together or own something together and be with me all of the time. Then when we break up she says that everything that I do annoys her and I am not affectionate enough. She states that I am too content with my life and she needs more. I believe that I am happy and have everything that I want or need. All of that was hard to understand and still is because I tried to be the best I could but it was never good enough. She stated she was living "my" life and not hers, yet she loved everything that we did. Their are many other examples that lead me to beleive that she is experiencing hypomania, however, I am not a doctor but I know her life style and what she is doing because we live across the street from each other. I do love her very much and I guess my question is what happens if she is experiencing hypomania and then starts to turn to a "normal" mood? All of her decisions the past few months have me completely confused and searching for answers. Maybe their are none.
Did you find this post helpful?
|

replied August 25th, 2006
Re: Bipolar Ex-girlfriend
butterfly34 wrote:
hello,

i dated my ex-girlfriend for exactly 2 years before she broke it off. However, before that she/we made the decision to move across the street from me and 2 weeks later it was over! Then 2 weeks after that she starts seriously dating someone else. All of this has been very hard to understand for me. This spring everything I did was never good enough and she was always angry or irritated with me. All of this drove me to the point where I thought I could never make her happy and I was also frustrated. I am a very patient person and thought she needed time to think and asked her if she wanted to take some time to herself. I of course did not want to see that but wanted her to figure out what she wanted. As soon as I stated that she made her mind up and it was over for her. Early in our relationship she had told me that she was diagnosed with bipolar by two doctors, however, a third doctor stated she had been mis-diagnosed. Her sister, who she is very close with and everyone else cannot understand what she is doing and believe that she needs to be on medication. Whether or not they are letting her know this or she will not listen I am not sure. I always thought that she was just emotional but looking back at her moods I "believe" that it was more than that. I am not trying to justify the relationship but searching for an understanding. At one time she wants to by a cabin together or own something together and be with me all of the time. Then when we break up she says that everything that I do annoys her and I am not affectionate enough. She states that I am too content with my life and she needs more. I believe that I am happy and have everything that I want or need. All of that was hard to understand and still is because I tried to be the best I could but it was never good enough. She stated she was living "my" life and not hers, yet she loved everything that we did. Their are many other examples that lead me to beleive that she is experiencing hypomania, however, I am not a doctor but I know her life style and what she is doing because we live across the street from each other. I do love her very much and I guess my question is what happens if she is experiencing hypomania and then starts to turn to a "normal" mood? All of her decisions the past few months have me completely confused and searching for answers. Maybe their are none.



....Sorry, I wish I had answers, but do not. But do have a question that goes with this... Maybe u can answer.

..How long does a hypomania episode last?? I mean, could it be months???...Or just weeks??... And if it is months, do they not realize what they just did??... Do u think she's resenting leaving u??? =(
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 25th, 2006
Question/answer?
I guess that would ultimately be my question as well. Maybe someone out there knows...
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 29th, 2006
Sorry man, I know partly how you feel kind of like with my ex girlfriend, I knew she had some sort of mental illness after I saw some of her mood swings/episodes and I didn't really start to think about it until after our relationship. Your girlfriend probably is bipolar but who knows, it might be something else. Though I can't fully understand what you going through because I am probably much younger than you :/ goodluck =)
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 29th, 2006
After the Fact
It does suck, you think you are dealing with something else and trying to work through those issues, however, in hindsight you find out what you are doing and would do in a "normal" relationship does not and will not work.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 14th, 2010
First thing is remember its not your fault. Never doubt that. She is trying to blame you to relieve her guilt. Her reasons are selfish. She wants it all and is addicted to attention of men. Behind that happy loving face is someone who hates themselves. The new guy is going to get it now and has no idea whats comming. Dont expect her to appreciate all the things she appreciated about you. You're a good man. Know it. Logic wont work. Be happy and confident if you talk to her. Agree and wish her well. Maybe she'll come back but only if you dont care. She's gone and its the best thing that ever happened to you. You just don't know it yet.
|
Did you find this post helpful?
Must Read
Do you know what bipolar is exactly? And what types of bipolar do doctors classify and diagnose? Learn more basics about bipolar disorder here....
Can stress put you at risk of developing bipolar disorder? Read here for information on risk factors which increase the likelihood that someone becomes bipolar....
Bipolar is difficult to diagnose as an illness ... but bipolar symptoms are usually accompanied by extreme changes. What are the symptoms of bipolar disorder?...