Medical Questions > Abortion > Abortion Pro Choice Forum

Something That Always Irritates Me. (Page 1)

I am always irritated by when someone says, "have you thought about adoption?" "what about adoption?" "have you heard all of your options-like adoption?"

because it is invariably followed by this statement, "because [insert some number here] couples are just dying to adopt *your* child!"

what a load of sh*t! If there are couples out there who are just dying to adopt, why don't they adopt one of the .H.U.N.D.R.E.D.S. O.F. T.H.O.U.S.A.N.D.S of children languishing within the adoption and foster programs?

Oh, that's right...Because they aren't white, healthy, infants (bonus points for the possibility of blonde hair and blue eyes). A child over the age of 2 who is still within the system has more of a chance of getting hit by lightning than they do of being adopted.

So, where are all of these couples who are just dying to adopt when there .A.R.E literally hundreds of thousands of children waiting for "good" homes?

I put 'good' in quotation marks because if a couple is sooooo shallow as to only want a specific kind, color, etc. Of child then I doubt the quality of said home. Clearly, a couple who wants a specific type of child is more concerned with keeping up certain appearances than they are of actually being parents.

A good friend of mine in highschool became pregnant and decided that she would follow her families beliefs and teachings, keep the pregnancy, and give the resulting child up for adoption since both she and the father were scholarship candidates for good colleges next year. She called several adoption agencies but everytime she told them the .R.A.C.E of the father, they stopped taking her calls, ignored her, or told her, "i'm sorry but you're not a viable candidate for our program." in the end, she could find no one who wanted to adopt a half black, half white child and had an abortion at the start of her second trimester.

Adoption is not an alternative to abortion, like some people seem to believe. It is instead an alternative to parenting but if no one wants to parent your ethnic or handicapped child, then what options are you really left with?

It truly is strange to me that people will wait upwards of 7 years to adopt an infant when there are children, who are still very young children, waiting.

Most women aren't blind and we certainly aren't stupid. We all know what this process is actually like and how ugly it truly seems to be. Is it any wonder why many .Women do not view this as a viable option even when they decide to remain pregnant?
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replied May 18th, 2006
Experienced User
All Females Should Be Given Morning After Pills...
Right freeking on sister!!

I am/was friends with quite a few people that were in state custody & the only thing that ever happened to them was abuse, rape, rape, more rape, beatings, neglect, rape, exc. & these are all males! One friend was even given to a couple just so they could use him, at the age of 8, as a servant to clean up after them! Luckily, a caseworker found out about this, & the beatings, & took him out of that home!

By the time he was adopted by his final family, good people that just wanted a child no matter what they got, he was so screwed up that he ended up addicted to every substance known to man kind & eventually ended up killing himself because he couldn't deal with what had happened to him.

It is the same story no matter who I talk to, male, female, young, or old. A majority of kids in foster care/state custody end up so used & abused that they can never have a truly happy life.

The story above happened to one of the nicest guy's I have ever met & he was one of my closest friends. We are still not 100% sure it was suicide or accidential overdose...& we will never know.

If those people that protest in front of abortion clinics really gave a damn then they would be standing there not with a sign but with a contract! A contract stating that they will take in the child & give it the good home & love that the birth parents obviously can't provide for it!

I am pretty sure that a just and loving god will punish the protesters a lot more harshly then the women who will grieve for the rest of their lives over the loss of their child.

& there is a big difference between grieving for the loss & regreteing going though with it.

They thought the situation out & realized that having a child you can give your all to is the only right thing to do. If you can't give it what it needs to live a long & happy life then it is not time for that child!

If information about the morning after pill was not being distorted & twisted then most of these abortions would not be needed in the first place!

It should be a requirement that all females should have a 6-pack of m.A.P.'s on them at all times! It solves all your problems right then & there!

Fooking bible-thumping-whack-jobs are causing the abortions that they claim they want to stop!

Ok, i'll stop now before I get angry...

I hope I have helped some of you with my opinions!
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replied May 19th, 2006
Extremely eHealthy
I know exactly what you are saying jenn and avatarofurdreams I am sure that their are a few good homes and a few children might be adopted properly but it is a sad situation for too many of them, that is why I say, let's keep abortion legal at least they are better off then the way that some of these children must live.
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replied May 22nd, 2006
Active User, very eHealthy
Quote:
if those people that protest in front of abortion clinics really gave a damn then they would be standing there not with a sign but with a contract! A contract stating that they will take in the child & give it the good home & love that the birth parents obviously can't provide for it!


i agree with this entirely - if the freaking pro-lifers are so in love with life, why the hell aren't they out adopting the kids that need homes instead of trying to save another potential human? I fantasize about laws being put into effect that would require anyone who is pro-life to adopt at least one child. Since they are supportive of life, why don't they start supporting the life that already exists?

I hate how people will make adoption services seem so wonderful. No one believes me when I say that a lot of kids in foster care never find a happy ending - I think someone on here in the debate forum said that adoption services are wonderful because they have one friend who was adopted and lives a normal and happy life. I think these idiots know what happens for a lot of adopted kids, but they just prefer to sweep it under the carpet so adoption can maintain it's "save the baby, goody goody!" reputation.
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replied May 22nd, 2006
Experienced User
Totally agree I was put into a foster home before only for a short time luckily. But most of the time foster care homes around here are only in it for the money. That pisses me off. Each and every child deserves the love and care as the next. And most foster homes could give a crap less. I have seen soooo many foster places around the part of alabama I am from that have 6 and 7 foster kids. They get around 2,700 to 3,000 dollars a month for just one. And they sit and wait on these poor kids checks to come in. Basically just a free ride and plenty of money in there pockets. And no love for the kids.

Its so sad to see things like this and it eerks me because its a daily thing in america.
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replied August 4th, 2006
Well adoption is another choice love. Someone is trying to not make you go through that pain in abortion. I would say that to you if you said I am pregnant I would not advise you to abort.
They are other option but adoption is a good solution but abortion and putting your body through that could cause you do not have kids again. Babies are conceived to live not die.
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replied August 4th, 2006
Active User, very eHealthy
Ooo this is a good topic! I only read jenn's sorry, I will read later. But thought id add that:

pro-lifers always say ''i couldnt imagine my life without my son and daughter''

its like 'hello, if you hadnt got up the duff in the first place then you wouldnt ever know.

U see what I mean? You cant imagine a life without a feotus? U know what I mean its not like you have chats with them when they r the little vegetable at 7 weeks.

Peevs me right off
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replied August 4th, 2006
I kind of can't be bothered anymore because they see it as something that is best of them. No matter how they say the baby would be unloved etc. I don't care anymore because it's there choice I don't agree though.
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replied August 5th, 2006
Especially eHealthy
Well just remember mystery, there is a majority of people on this forum section who would rather abort, for moral and ethical reasons, than give birth.
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replied August 6th, 2006
Active User, very eHealthy
Is mystery pro-choice or pro-life? I cant figure it out! Its a mystery!

:lol:
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replied August 6th, 2006
Advanced Support Team
By the sounds of all of her/his post I am assuming that this person is intermediate and not for sure. Or im saying that this person is pro life all the way.. It is def. A mystery..
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replied August 6th, 2006
Active User, very eHealthy
Indeed.

Oh the irony!

I was thinking she is pro-life? Maybe your right tazzy, she swings both ways. Lol :p
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replied August 6th, 2006
Especially eHealthy
She is as pro-choice as someone like cowboys, in the sense that she is okay with abortion to save a mother's life, and I think she is okay with abortion for rape/incest, but basically every other situation, it is bad to have an abortion. Which is really the pro-life point of view. Isn't this issue lovely and confusing?
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replied August 6th, 2006
Extremely eHealthy
She constantly talks about how women who abort are "sick" and that financial reasons are not valid and "rubbish" reasons to have an abortion so I can't really believe she's pro-choice in the slightest. I think she has a very narrow minded view of abortion, hopefully she'll be able to do something about that!
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replied August 6th, 2006
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I realize that I am not here to judge but my feelings are kind of like ,moo's. Maybe he or she could be 9 or 10 y/o and just does not understand other female's situation, mystery has never walked into a situation where it is sometime's necessary to have an abortion and has never known very many people that has lived in a foster home and maybe she got lucky and got adopted into a great home(one of the not so many lucky one's) as I have known several that have not been very lucky that were brought up in a not very good foster home and like I said before some are good but I agree with jenn, it is not a choice that I would chose. Possibly this male?Female(mystery) is older and is fortunate and has a great husband, b/f, significant other that is great to her and she has never had to walk in some of thes unfortunate female's shoes where they did not have much of a choice and they felt that aborting was their best bet at the time(i realize that that was sort of a repeat). I also realise that she is kind of new but with an attitude like that, she/he should not be posting in the pro-choice forum.
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replied August 6th, 2006
Extremely eHealthy
I was actually wondering whether she'd had an abortion recently, I know some women who do suddenly feel very angry towards it...Maybe not, just something isn't quite right
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replied August 6th, 2006
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Moo, that is possible, but I believe almost anything is possible and if it is the truth, we are here for her!
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replied August 6th, 2006
Advanced Support Team
Mystery
Mystery,
if there is something that we can do to help you please pm me or let someone know. We are all here for you especially if there is something wrong or if you just need to ask a question or just dont understand something. No one is here to be mean I think some of us just dont understand your point of view. So to start out with. Why dont you tell us a little about yourself and how you feel exactly on abortion or what your views are on abortion.
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replied August 6th, 2006
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Mystery
As I just said prior I am not here to judge you. I (we)are here to help you! I know that it is not an easy decision even having to have one or nee
ding to have one, we do what is right at the time. I had to have two necessary abortions and at 1st I had two miscaarriages, I thought I would never have kids and my dr felt the same way and then I had two perfect babies that are now grown and are on their own and are doing great! So things do turn out for the good, when you least expect it too! We are here for you if you need us and I was in no wasy trying to judge you or be mean to you! I am not a mean person and being pro-choice does not mean that that we are mean. If they were to take away our choices of abortion do you realize what would happen if females did need an abortion, all of the red tape that that female would have to go through. I had a friend of mine when abortion was illegal that no dr would touch because it being illegal not even the backyard butcher because he knew that she needed a professional abortion, 2 days after she died after bleeding to death the abortion was approved. We don't want this to happen to females do we?
All the best!
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replied August 7th, 2006
Active User, very eHealthy
Well in the end. Is she pro-choice or pro-life? Thats all I wanna know. Cause if shes pro-life. Then dont come here.Lol im not being mean. But im not here to be called any names. I havent been here, so does someone wanna fill me in?

Like moo sed she ''contantly says women are sick''??
Whats that all about?

Maybe your right moo. Maybe she did have an abortion and is feeling angry.
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