Medical Questions > Relationships > Broken Hearted Forum

Why Do I Contunie to Love Him?!

Ok, so i've been with my bf for 14 months this coming weekend. The first 8 months of our relationship was perfect, we fell in love and he was the best thing I could ever ask for. So sweet and caring, don't get me wrong he still is but a lot of things have changed since september.

I think I know one reason why though. September 6th I broke up with him to get with someone else, we were arguing all the time, dunno what I was thinking getting with someone else, but I did. It was a big mistake. So, I think that could be part of his problem? Scared that i'll leave him.

I just care about this guy so much, but I dunno what to do. We've been through so much together, everytime I think about it I start crying. He's been making me cry almost everyday, but i'm very sensitive also. It never seems like he has time for me either, except for evenings and some weekends. I make time for him no matter what i'm doing, i'll drop it. I just want the same in return. Everytime I mention taking a little break so I can get my crap togehter, he starts screaming and yelling..All that jazz.

So, what i'm asking, how should I confront him on what his problem is? Does it sound to you that he could still be heart broken with what happened in september? He always tells me i'm the problem, i'm dumb..But he always apologizes and sucks up.

Ohh, he was at my house a few days ago, and I fell asleep on accident because I was tired. He said I started talking about my ex, telling him that I love him and miss him. I don't know whether to believe that or not because i've never been told I talk in my sleep.

I'm just so confused on what to do. I love him, but i'm not strong enough for all this pain he has been putting our relationship through!
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replied March 16th, 2006
Especially eHealthy
I think you just need to ask him strait out what his problem is with you. If he is acting in a way that is always making you cry(even though you are sensetive),its wrong,and calling you dumb is not the best thing to say to someone you say you love.You just need to talk to him and ask him what he wants.And if he wants you and wants to stay together tell him he can't act like this anymore.I have an agreement with my bf that when we havea problem or we fight,we talk about it once,get everything out,and then its over,we are not allowed to talk about it anymore.It has seemed to work well!
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replied March 16th, 2006
Experienced User
When he started talking about your ex (when you fell asleep), he could just be fabricating it to strike up a conversation with you about how he's feeling, or maybe you really did talk about your ex while asleep. Who knows. I think you need to sit him down and have a real relationship talk and find out how he currently feels about what happened in september. Let him know that you didn't cheat on him and you didn't do it to hurt him...You broke up fair and square because of the fighting that was ensuing (which is a common reason for break-ups and people needing space from their partners for awhile)...And don't let him call you dumb or insult you again, because you don't deserve to be harassed for doing what you felt was right for you.
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replied March 17th, 2006
Experienced User
Thank you!

We started having a biiig long talk on the night I wrote this (wednesday I believe) all was going well, I asked him about the whole ex thing and he told me he has gotten over it, and we promised each other to never talk about him again! Yay!

Then I brought up the subject of taking a little break so I can clear my mind and just get away for awhile...And that started a huuuuge argument! Wow, he said I just wated a break to get with someone else, which so isn't true! We were arguing until like 1 in the morning .... And finally he just hung up on me and I cryyed all night, it sucked!

Then thursday he was sending me txt msgs when he got out of school and he called me just yelling and screaming saying that I was being so mean about something, and that i'm just upset with him and holding it in. Finally, he realized everything and I think everything is okay now...But who knows!
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replied March 17th, 2006
Especially eHealthy
So you guys are good? Are you on a break?
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replied March 17th, 2006
Experienced User
It's not really a break, i'm just trying to give myself a little space from him! If ya know what I mean

:)
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replied March 17th, 2006
Experienced User
I think having some space would be a good idea for both of you... He clearly needs to stop getting so mad, you shouldn't have to put up with that.
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