I am new here, just looking for some advise. Well here is my story. Recently my girlfreind has been acting strange, staying out late, lying about where she is going. When I confronted her and asked if she was cheating on me she said no and continued to explain that the person she was seeing behind my back was gay and she enjoyed hanging out with him and talking. I don't know why she lied about it in the first place if he is gay I should not worry right? He is always messeging her at night saying good night and what not. Should I be jealous of this, is this considered cheating, I am confused about the whole situation and don't know if I should get mad or what. Is this gay man trying to take my girlfriend from me? She says see still loves me, but our relationship has been on rocky ground for sometime. Sorry for this but I do not have any experience with gay people, should I consider him as a man and consider this to be cheating?

Any advise will be appreciated.
Thank you,
mnm
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replied January 10th, 2006
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Just a Thought.....
Hi, if this relationship with your girlfriend were as serious to her, as it seems to you, why not confront this "other person". If this "other person" is gay, why has she not brought him around for you to meet? I mean, theres not a threat involved? Gay or not, that is not the issue. Friends are friends and their sexual pref. Is their choice. If this person is indeed a friend, why can she not ask you to go along with them? Something in this net is not holding the fish....I mean there seems to be some holes in it. The staying out late and the "secretive" parts would make me suspicious. I'd say the ball is in your court. You can either confront and find the truth, or continue to be curious and allow yourself to get hurt?????? Hmmmmm, go figure?????Sounds really funky to me!
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replied January 10th, 2006
Should I Worry?
Thank you for taking the time to respond so quickly. Would it be better to confront this guy? I have been considering it, but I do not know how she would react. It could make matters worse for us. She and I have been faithfull to each other for 10 years during that time she never went out with friends(i know that is not healthy)then all of the sudden she finds this gay friend and she says she wants to go out and enjoy life with friends from work. Am I not reading into this deep enough, could she be wanting a way out of this relationship or is she just really wanting to have fun without me. She married early and has 3 kids from a previous marriage that I have taken care of since we met. I love them like my own, and just can't understand the sudden change. Is easier to talk to gay men? Do they understand women better than straight men? I am really confused, am I even posting in the right forum, should I be in the relationsip forum?

Sorry if I am not making sense, I just have no one to talk to and so many thought running through my head.
Thank you,
mnm
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replied August 23rd, 2006
Experienced User
Be careful with that, that guy doesnt sound like a gay person...It sounds like a straight man...Dont get jealous, try the same thing to her..This will let you know if she is playing the field..If she gets upset at what you do, then she will understand how you feel..If she still wants to be in this type of relationship then she needs to let you know..Ask to meet this so called friend of hers..This will let you know if he is gay or straight..If she refuses then you have your answer..
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