Medical Questions > Relationships > Broken Hearted Forum

Male / Female Realtionships

It's hard to know where to began. To understand the whole story must be told. I am 28 years old male. My best friend is a 25 year old female. We will call her marie. We are like family, brother and sister. We have been friends for 11 years now. We have been best friends for 7 years. In our high school years we had another friend that was a girl that I was very in love with. I will call here anne.

Marie and anne lived together at anne's house. It was kinda wild there. Up to 4 or 5 girls would live their at a time. They where all little punk rock girls back then. I was there everyday but spent all my time with anne. Later on marie meets a friend of mine from even further back. I will call him matt. Matt and marie meet and began seeing each other. It was cool for me because I felt she was with someone she could trust. Marie moved in with matt and the other gilrs started thinning out at anne's house as timed passed.

I had finally gather the courage to tell anne how I felt about her. It was to late though. Her father had been transfered to a city 3 hours away. I was crushed. After she left I started to loss my hair on my head and the back of my legs. Marie was the one that was there that helped me through. For her being there for me I was greatful and willing to do anything matt and marie needed. I did too.

I began to pick marie up from work so that her (now husband) matt can sleep. She got of work late a didn't have a license. It became a daily routine. This lead us to find out all the things we had in common. From the way we grew up, our families, hobbies, just about everything. It was almost uncanny. It made us inseparable.

This went on for 6 years. But here's where things start to change. 2 years into being best friends a girl from the past that used to stay at annes in high school came to maries. I will call here cathy. Cathy was now a stripper. She told marie that should could make a lot of money waiting tables at the strip club. This caused problems with us. It was because I feared she would get stuck there and get sucked in. My worries where laid to rest after time. She was strong.

After 3 more years the drives to work became only a portion of the thing I would do. I would clean there place for them at times. I have done her homework for college more than once. I basically treated her like a queen for all that time with no real problems. Then she changed to the day shift.

When she began the day shift she began to make friends with some of the girls. Later she began to go out with them to drink. No problems yet. Then her husband joins the air force. In 1 year she is going to move away for 6 months. Then come home for 6 months then move again for 2 years. I was again crushed. Before her husband left they moved into my house. I was relieved because I felt that I would get to spend alot of time with her before she left. We already where together everyday.

Matt left for his boot camp and it started. Marie started spending all of her time with the girls from work and a guy that her and matt meet just recently at a bar. The only time I would see her is taking her to and from work. She was always drunk and eventually became hypoglycemic. I couldn't watch here destroy herself anymore so I said she should move. She moved in with a girl from work. 3 weeks later she cheated on her husband with the guy they meet at the bar. My image of her was destroyed.

Even with my thought of her tainted I knew I was the only one that could be there for her. Turns out while she would drink this guy was feeding her some pill nicknamed ribs. Some kinda date rape drug. She told her husband and me. He was still gone but would be home soon. We where close again. Then matt came home and they moved.

6 months past and she returned home while matts on tour. Everything was fine till we meet this new group of people. It is close to her house and easy for her to get to. Anyways she spends every free moment there with these people she barely knows and never really has anything to say to me while we are there. I approached her and asked if she could find sometime to do something with me for old times sake. This causes us to fight for 3 weeks now. Constant circles. I cracked. I asked her with tears in my eyes to please tell me that she can find the time to do somethings with me for old times sake because her lack of interest in our friendship is breaking my heart. She said no. I said good bye. Its the same pattern as last year and it frightens me. I have no doubt that in time we will be friends again. Probably before she leaves in 2 months.

I just want to know if what I asked for was wrong. She is the most important person in my life and she knows it, but in thought last 3 weeks of fighting I was drained. It doesn't even hurt anymore. I cried over her to much already. Am I out of place for asking for time alone so I can be with my best friend?

Thank you all for your time.
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