Sometimes in life I think there comes a point where you either move forward or don't move at all. I've gotten to that point and I am in big trouble. I don't want to recover anymore and I just want to die. I hate this stupid disorder, its the worst thing thats ever happened to me and its ruined my life yet why am I still here with this stupid thing living it everyday and rather dying that getting better. I am so confused and I wonder if I am just someone who can't recover from this am I so different that I am the only one who can't get better, I am the only one hope doesn't exist for? I am so lost and so frightened I don't know what to do anymore. I am scared.
Life is so strange and I don't understand it one bit. My life is so [email protected]#^ed up and I don't know how it got this way I don't know what i've done to deserve this. I must be such a bad person.I tried to kill myself a number of times and I want to do it properly. No one deserves to know me, no one deserves to be hurt by me. :cry:
I just don't know what to do now. Should I give up, just I just let go and get it over with or should I hang on just to see what happenens. I really don't want to die but I can't see what else there is left to do. I've got nothing and no one and I am so afraid that life wil be like this forever, I don't want to live like this forever. My mind is racing so fast between taking tablets just to get it over with and then not taking them and living. What should I do. Help me someone, please help me! :cry:
sorry I know no one can help me but myself your kind of just listening to my head and the conflict thats there at the moment. It should go away I hope. I am just very lost at the moment and i'm going through alot, just finding it difficult to cope. It will turn out for the best, life is funny that way, it helps you along without you even realising it. Already I have survived this week and I didn't think I would so life is ok sometimes. :? Thanks to anyone who read my little freak attack but nothing lasts forever and I wont either.
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replied April 13th, 2005
Hey darling calm down, how old are you hun and what disorder have you got, are you on medication babe cause you are depressed and need it, I know what its like to feel so down you cant bear to live anymore I have obsession compulsive disorder which causes jealousy attacks it rules my life and makes me down iv taken an overdose but I have councilling and anti depressants to pick myself up im 17 now and learning to deal with my problems,,, I am certain you are over exaggerating I bet your a brilliant girl your just being hard on yourself relax stop giving yourself such a hard time, sometimes yourself can be your own worst enemy. Keep your chin up honey take care.
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replied April 14th, 2005
Experienced User
I Wrote That Post
Ok I am very confused I wrote the post a week or tow ago but now its under a different name. What is going on? Has someone else wrote the exact same thing as me and if they have well then I know exaclty how you feel because I wrote the exact same post with the exact same words. Can anyone tell me what is going on?
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replied April 14th, 2005
I Know
Thats weird that we posted the same this we must be feeling the same way
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replied April 14th, 2005
Experienced User
Weird Or What
Maybe my computer is just messed up because you wrote my very words, so I am still really confused. Well I hope you are ok and are feeling better now; as you said life seems to turn out ok and it will. Take care,

jenny
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