Medical Questions > Pregnancy Forum > Teen Pregnancy Forum

Being a Grandparent (Page 1)

Do you think if your child got pregnant as a teenager (working part-time or not at all) you should have a say so in what she does with the baby, keep it, abort, adoption?


I dont to a point, I would want her to listen to my advice, and id support her through anything. I wouldnt force anything on her tho.

<3
gaby
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replied October 2nd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
I would want her to keep it!! Thats all there is to it really...I do believe its abortions are wrong...And think she might regret it by giving it away. But that is her choice but I would say that I would have a huge say in it. Although I would try to prevent an early pregnancy as much as I could
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replied October 2nd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
Yeh, im going to be open with my daughter and hopefully she will be comfortable talkin to me like I was with my mom which is why im on birth control right now.

I do believe in abortion, but would never doit. But I support people who do.

<3
gaby
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replied October 2nd, 2004
Community Volunteer
I'd like to think my kids could come to me and tell me what they wanted.
I'd also like to think my kids would be comfortable enough to come and confide in me that they were becoming sexually active, and that I would be able to guide their choices so that this didn't happen until they were ready.
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replied October 2nd, 2004
Especially eHealthy
My choices for her:
abortion~not an option
keep it~yes
adoption~i'd be the one to adopt it. So.... Either way the kid would still be in my fam!
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replied October 2nd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
I like your adoption idea chanda!

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gaby
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replied October 2nd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
Abortion is wrong, adoption is an option.
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replied October 2nd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
Lol chanda those were my parents options for me!!
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replied October 2nd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
Re: Being a Grandparent
bellax0x wrote:
i dont to a point, I would want her to listen to my advice, and id support her through anything. I wouldnt force anything on her tho.


i agree with you gaby. If my daughter is old enough for sex, she is old enough to make that decision herself. I know I would have an opinion, and I would voice it. I would expect her to listen to what I have to say, but I would also expect her to make her own decision.
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replied October 2nd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
It's up to the kid to decide. Forced gestation is just as bad as forced abortion in the terms of the person carrying the pregnancy. If you want me to have the baby .A.N.D keep it, then you better take care of it 100%. Having a kid would totally totally mess up my plan for my life and it would hurt me very bad.., if you read what I wrote about how I feel about life in the "just thinking" thread you know how I feel if something happens to my bf.. Should I choose suicide I don't want some kid tying me to this earth. I am on birth control and am thinking of either getting sterilized or and iud.. Only the highest birth control forms for me regardless of any negative side effects (no side effect could be worse than getting pregnant imo) not to mention I may be infertile anyway so i'm not taking any irresponsible risk here and I only have sex once a week on a good month so it's not like i'm a [tramp] or anything so I don't want to hear it. I'm sorry but I don't give a rat's behind how bad anyone may want grandkids.. They aint getting one from me and the sooner they realize that, the better.. What I will do is let them hire a surrogate and then pay me to give up my eggs or whatever it is they need from me or my bf and then when the baby comes, they can take care of it and no I will not babysit... Ever!
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replied October 3rd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
I would definitely support her, and tell her to keep it, because look @ me. At my age look how young i'm having a child, so I wouldnt definitely be there for her 100%.
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replied October 3rd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
I'd be there 100% for her just like nippz said. I cant really say shes stupid for gettin pregnant at a young age since I got pregnant at 16 had her when I was 17. But all I could tell her is that id be there for her 100% if she did end up preggers but before she has the chance to do that id explain how hard it is etc so she thinks about the concicounces(sp?) before having unprotected sex.
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replied October 3rd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
I got pregnant at 18 and they were trying as hard as they could to force me into abortions they said if I was under 18 id have no choice or options in the world and would be forced by them or my life a living hell :-/
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replied October 3rd, 2004
Community Volunteer
I don't know where the girl was from in america, but on a program I watched recently a 15 year old gave birth.
She had been trying for 3 months to get pregnant! Because she was under 16 legally she could not take responsibility for her child, she was lucky in that her mom agreed to sort things out and to take legal custody of the baby so she could keep it.
Is that quite widespread for you guys, not being able to legally take custody of your own kid if you are under 16 when you give birth?
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replied October 3rd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
You can have a baby at any age and you have full custody

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gaby
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replied October 3rd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
bd1012 wrote:
it's up to the kid to decide. Forced gestation is just as bad as forced abortion in the terms of the person carrying the pregnancy. If you want me to have the baby .A.N.D keep it, then you better take care of it 100%. Having a kid would totally totally mess up my plan for my life and it would hurt me very bad.., if you read what I wrote about how I feel about life in the "just thinking" thread you know how I feel if something happens to my bf.. Should I choose suicide I don't want some kid tying me to this earth. I am on birth control and am thinking of either getting sterilized or and iud.. Only the highest birth control forms for me regardless of any negative side effects (no side effect could be worse than getting pregnant imo) not to mention I may be infertile anyway so i'm not taking any irresponsible risk here and I only have sex once a week on a good month so it's not like i'm a [tramp] or anything so I don't want to hear it. I'm sorry but I don't give a rat's behind how bad anyone may want grandkids.. They aint getting one from me and the sooner they realize that, the better.. What I will do is let them hire a surrogate and then pay me to give up my eggs or whatever it is they need from me or my bf and then when the baby comes, they can take care of it and no I will not babysit... Ever!


what are you doing on a teen pregnancy forum if you're so anti-children??? Don't you think that's hypocritical?! Because I think it is. Maybe you should get sterilised & have it over & done with
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replied October 3rd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
I'm not antichildren, and i'm on here because someone mentioned this place from another site i'm on and I just liked it here so I kept coming. To me, kids are like cats (no offense meant).. They are cute but to have one is a diffrent story. It's not up to anyone but me whether i'm 12 or 22 whether or not I have a baby. To me life is like a poker game.. I try to play all my cards right and if I don't I may lose, and who knows my cards better than me? You don't know my cards so don't tell me to fold my cards when I could have a good hand, if you did that , you would make me lose and you especially don't do that, because you don't know how big I would lose. Understand kind of? Sorry for the corny analogies. Right now I am hearing they wont give iuds to people of my age, let alone tie my tubes Rolling Eyes which I believe is ridiculous because its my uterus, not theirs. If I say no.. It don't go and vice versa. I have 150% say in what happens with my reproductive organs, not my mother, my bf or even god if he exists has a say, let alone some strange doctor. If I got the money and I consent, than you tie my tubes with no if's and's or but's. I'm thinking maybe it's possible that if someone denies you a sterilization and you get pregnant, you can sue for the cost of the abortion or the childbirth and for any punitive damages that may come from having the child or the abortion.
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replied October 3rd, 2004
Especially eHealthy
Totally different view of you now......
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replied October 3rd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
A view that i'm a !**@!?
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replied October 3rd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
Guess so.. I dont' mean to sound cold but that's just my opinion.. It's no one right to force someone else to gestate and if you use the "you should've kept your legs closed argument" than you should say the same thing if you smoke and get lung cancer. I don't see how you can see forced abortion as wrong but not forced gestation. It's just my opinon, you all gave yours, I gave mine. Everyone elses just happens to "fit" within what everyone hear accepts.
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