Medical Questions > Relationships > Broken Hearted Forum

culture or family the hindrance of relationship

I have relationship for 10 months now. I am a Filipina and he is a Palestinian. For past months our relationship going very well but when he went back to his hometown last month January 2008 he became different. Now, he said to me its better to end up our relationship because of our culture and family. He can't disobey his family. As far as i know his family arrange a marriage to him with the same nationality in the same town... I love him that much thats why i cant give him back or let go. He said he will not leave me but he cant give to me a serious relationship in the future. And i accepted that we will continue our relationship. I dont know what happen to me nowadays... I am ready to sacrifice all the things for this crazy love...

I would like to ask is the culture or family i really the hindrance of our relationship???

Please help...

Always,

Cherry
Did you find this post helpful?
|

User Profile
replied February 7th, 2008
Supporter
Sounds like it. What a shame.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied February 8th, 2008
Supporter
RE: culture or family the hindrance of relationship
You don't state how old the both of you are so the question is kind of hard to answer.

At one time, no one married outside of his/her culture, even in the US. Germans married Germans, French married French, etc., and you NEVER went against your family for fear of essentially being disowned.

That has changed for many people but not all. I have friends from India--two did the arranged marriage thing and the third (a woman) found her own husband. Neither set of parents objected in the last case. A Syrian friend of mine married an American with no problems in either family.

However, there are people for whom associating with, much less marrying, outside of the culture is completely unthinkable. Family = culture. This can put the children in a bad spot, having to choose between family expectations and potential future happiness.

If he's an adult, he must decide for himself which way he wants to go. If he doesn't choose you there's nothing you can do to get him back. I know you don't want to be alone (who does) but that is one of the risks in any relationship--regardless of culture.

He has to love you for who you are. If what's keeping you apart is stronger than what holds you together then it's time to go your own way.

What would you tell someone who came to you with this problem?

Good luck and please keep posting.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied February 12th, 2008
Hello
Thanks for the advise... I am happy now... maybe he doesnt have his own backbone..hahaha..but that is not a problem now... We officially break up coz i realized its not good for me... I was the only one who exerted the effort and time but him, he just do nothing but have fun with his friends...

By the way, he is 24 and am 24 also..

Thanks guys...

Cherry
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied March 2nd, 2008
Sounds like you did the right thing Cherry. Good luck.
|
Did you find this post helpful?
Quick Reply