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Any Advice About a Not So Enthusiastic Father?????

I'm two months pregnant by my boyfriend, who I have only been with 4 months. The pregnancy was a complete accident and surprise. He is 22 and i'm 19. He has 4 kids and is a wonderful father, but his kids live out of the state. I have no kids. We are both in college. He really wants me to have an abortion, but I am strongly against using abortion like birth control. I have never had an abortion and I don't want to have one now. He says that he will have nothing to do with me or the baby if I keep it. But he still wants to stay in a relationship, without the baby. We are moving in our apartment together this weekend and he thinks I am going to have an abortion. We argue when I talk about keeping my baby he says it will ruin my life, but I know I can do it. I don't understand how he can love his kids and be such a good father but be so adamant about me not keeping my baby, especially if we are going to be together. I don't know if he just needs some time to get used to the idea that we are going to have a baby. Has anyone been in a similar situation? What was the outcome? What did you do or what are you planning to do? Please offer any advice or suggestions. Thank you.
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replied September 12th, 2003
I understand that this is a very confusing time for you right now. Your boyfriend wants you to chose between him or your child. It is very apparant that you do not want to have an abortion. Is your boyfriend someone that you really want to marry someday? Does he ever want any other children? Is it worth giving up all your principles just to stay with a guy that already has 4 kids in another state that he probally doesn't even support. I can tell you have a beautiful soul and I urge you to go with what you feel is right and what you believe. There will be some hard times ahead but your baby should be your number one priority. Let me know what you think.
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replied September 12th, 2003
Extremely eHealthy
I urge you to keep this baby! If he says he loves you and wants to live with you, why cant he keep this baby? Hes not worth it if he tells you he wont be there for you if you have the baby. Why are all of his kids out in another state? If he didnt stay with that mother of all those kids, it should have been a red flag that something could go wrong if you got pregnant, he wouldnt be there either. You need to decide for yourself if this is the kind of man you want to spend your life with. You should not have to give up an innocent baby that you want to keep just because the guy your "love" says do not have it. Keep it and see how he adjusts. If he cant the let him go. Let us know what happens, good luck!
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replied September 12th, 2003
Nikki_caro is right. It's your decision in the end. He shouldn't try to tell you what to do with your life. You're old enough to make decisions for yourself. It's your body and your life. Just let him know that you've made your decision and that he's welcome to stay in your life if you want him there.
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