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Scared of Dying (Page 1)

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i have spent the past few months feeling really low everytime i think of dying. i can feel fine all day and then it will suddenly hits me... one day i wont be here... and i just stop breathing... i feel like i am trapped and cant escape... it's mainly at night that i feel this way, but it creeps in on me during the day too and i dont know what to do. my partner tells me im being morbid and i have been to the doctor and all he told me to do was to write my feelings down... nothing seems to help, and even though i have a really good life and a partner and family that really love me, i know that it can never be forever...
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First Helper User Profile piffle
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replied November 6th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
Just try and remember it is not dying we are afraid of, it is the way we die that we have the fear of. You happen to be chatting with one who know and has been through it.
I have asthma and COPD. I have been in the ER via car and 911 more time in one year then you have fingers. This past December I was sick with a really bad cold for about a week. I remember it like it was yesterday. I worked for a GYN at the time and she even said "If you are not better by Thursday, I am putting you on Z-pak. Ok, Thursday came and went and we were off on Fridays. By Friday afternoon around 4pm I was in trouble. I mean REAL trouble. I could not breath and I was truning blue! My sister called 911 and off I went. I don't remember getting in the ambulance or getting to the hospital where the crash (code team) was there waiting for me. I had to be intubated and on the ventaltor for 10 out of 16 days in CCU in a chemically induced coma.
The reason why I tell you this story is, I was not afraid to die. I just felt like death was near by when I could not breath. So, it was the not being able to breath that I was afraid of and not death at all. You don't feel death. You feel the onset of whatever is causing it. For me it was double pneumonia and an infiltrated lung and then MRSA set in to boot. As far as my doctor was concerned, I was dead!

Carrie
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Users who thank CarolDiane for this post: Loveothers 

replied November 7th, 2007
First of all. life is short. and yeah, thinking about dying is depressing so why do you think about it? you have a great life and a partner so focus on the beautiful things in life! Be glad you are alive a healthy! i've lost someone close to me and i am thankful everyday to be living. If you have something to die for, every part of life is worth living. i don't know if you are a christ believer, but this makes me not afraid to die because i know i'm only going to a better place. you have a life, so live it up. don't spend it being sad Smile be optimistic&thankful
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replied May 17th, 2008
i seriously think that is the stupidest thing anyone can say soory but i really need to quote on this ( LIFE IS SHORT) .
life is short???...... tell me something you know that is longer than life?
life is the longest thing you'll ever know
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replied May 17th, 2008
Extremely eHealthy
desazius wrote:
i seriously think that is the stupidest thing anyone can say soory but i really need to quote on this ( LIFE IS SHORT) .
life is short???...... tell me something you know that is longer than life?
life is the longest thing you'll ever know



respect Please...............
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replied May 17th, 2008
Experienced User
Piffle,
Everyone thinks about it, you are not morbid, just being realistic. Time heals all - you will be okay. Do you have children? Do you have family close to you? Do you feel sick - or are you just having thoughts of dying? As I said, time will help you, and bring you peace. Until then, continue to talk to your doctor about it. My thoughts are with you.
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replied May 19th, 2008
Extremely eHealthy
This sounds like anxiety. Have you seen a doctor about anxiety? Persistant thoughts that cause despair may be associated with anxiety or perhaps depression. Consider consulting with a psychiatrist.
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Users who thank antigone for this post: Loveothers 

replied May 19th, 2008
Experienced User
That is so true about the anxiety/depression, even if it is not anxiety/depression now, the persistant thoughts as antigone stated could cause it. You are young and pretty, live it up, go do something fun and exciting.
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replied May 22nd, 2008
I know exactly how you feel,I am a 34 year old juvenile diabetic who has recently started to have failing health due to this disease.I think about dying all of the time too and it is scary sometimes but I agree with CarolDiane,I am more afraid of what I'm going to die from,is it going to be kidney failure,or heartattack or stroke,infection from ulcerated sores. Nobody knows what is out there for us.But I also know that I can't let this fear take over my everyday life,I have to be strong for those who still need me today.If you give in to this fear it is going to ruin the rest of your life here on earth. I think that you should make an appointment to see your family doctor first of all,to get a clean bill of health so maybe that might ease some of your fears,and then discuss this problem with them.They may be able to prescribe you some anti-deppressant medications or refer you to someone who specializes in this area.Remember we are all here for you and will help in any way we can.
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replied July 5th, 2009
Afraid of Dying
i am very afraid of dying too!
My mother passed away 8 years ago from diabetes and i saw her die, my fear is not being able to breath, being in pain and suffering.
Just the thought of not knowing whats on the other side.
Is there nothing? there cant just be nothing!
i am afraid of the unknown.
Scary but i try to forget about it and live my life.
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replied August 3rd, 2009
I too am afraid of dying mostly because I am 67 and the obits are many every day of people dying younger than me. I am a strong believer in Christ but sometimes I still find myself wondering, I am also afraid of losing my wonderful husband. He is fairly healthy but a big guy and too heavy. I lost my 42 yr old son in 2005 out of the blue by his own deeds but now I am just hyper about death. I am always afraid that I am not doing enough for other people and that God won't think I am good enough for heaven.
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replied August 12th, 2009
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notootrusitng--HOney youknow God doesn't let us into heaven for our deeds but by our faith..

I believe the evil one is working hard to place the doubt inyour mind..

I am so sorry for the loss of your son..This was a horrible thing to happen to you and your husband..We are supose to outlive ourkids..My brother was self destructive and we all blamed ourselves because of his death but there really wasn't anything nayon eof us could have done..

I am 56 soon to be 57 I am by all means no authority on anything but jake of many trades..I am here if you want or you can PM I could use a friend myself..kd
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replied August 12th, 2009
Supporter
Dreamweaver I am sorry about your mom..It is a hard thing..I lost my mom a few years ago and diabetes was part of the problem..DO you have faith in God?..When your time comes heaven is a place of peace and a new pain free body..There our loved ones wait for us..Do not fear death..When it's time we care called and that's it..TO be ready is knowing we have loved and have faith in God..To do all we can while upon this earth to live as God wants us to..k
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replied August 14th, 2009
i have the answer that solve all the problems that people have and i know it my be weird for some people but its true i didnt believe it at the start but when i tried it i swear it works if you want to know it talk to me.
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replied September 6th, 2012
i am talking to you;';';'smile
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replied September 23rd, 2012
I want to know.
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replied August 22nd, 2009
Supporter
Dreamweaver and nottootrusting, I am wondering how you both are doing?

Since the posts am wondering if either of you have been able to get into counceling? There are some good people out there who listen and guide in the right direction..I hope you are both doing well..I was off line for a bit and just wanted to say hi..

i re-read my post and put Jake of all trades instead of Jack I guess in my case it would be jackie of all trades..LOL..Anyway, like everyone we all have our things we have and mine I think is listening..If I can't find an answer for you I will keep trying..Thankfully God is in control for me that is alot..k
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replied August 22nd, 2009
Hi piffle, you look too young to die. I'm glad you have a good life and hope you can overcome your fears.

1 John 5:13-18
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replied August 25th, 2009
Supporter
Morning and welcome to the forum..I'm sure that on some forums people are or have been drinking..Alot of sadness and pain show up on this forum..

What made you want to check in? Are you ok? k
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replied August 26th, 2009
I felt the very same way and I still do, but there is something you should realize that may make you feel a little better.

When you die, you go to exactly the same place as before birth. Do you remember that? No. Because you did not experience it. It's the same. Nature created you and it's going to take you back, which is perfectly fine and natural. You just won't experience it, you won't be there!

Now try to imagine your daily routines- wake up, brush teeth, breakfast, news, work.. sleep.. all over again. Do you really want to last this forever all over again every single day?? I wouldn't..

Fearing death/non-existence is the same as fearing pre-birth.. You're going back where you came from.

I still fear death and I'm sure I'm gonna panic when my time comes and I doubt I can get rid of the thought of dying, but I'm trying to get used to it. Haven't been very successful yet, but hopefully I can be happy one day, as all the other people I'm jealous about, just because they live happily and I don't.. and maybe death will be my best remedy soon.. who knows.

Good luck
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replied December 9th, 2009
i also have a fear of dying, even though i am very young, only mid-way through college, and realize i probably wont for a long time. someone i know my own age recently committed suicide, however, and it has completely shattered my world. i have been mourning this death, and others, along with my own mortality, i think, recently, as I am often upset. i find myself looking almost hyperactively for activities! i don't want to miss out on anything! the world is so beautiful and brilliant and elaborate. i cannot even begin to express how much i love everything here. maybe i am too attached. i contemplate buddhist values and consider that I am rather obsessively concerned with desires and physicality and this planet and my perspective. as an artist especially, though, it is hard for me to imagine a world without materials and the self. I think the only answer we can learn to accept is transience and selflessness. for me, it helps to imagine life not as a planned trajectory from beginning to end, with the end as a stopping point, but a sort of changing sphere or blurry, ever extending line, perhaps different colors but ever-present. energy is neither created nor destroyed, after all; you will still be here, in some form, after death. the binaries for life and death are a westernized sort of trauma we inflict on ourselves, i think. death is not a dark place. it is a place of self transformation that we will be prepared for when we reach it. until then, we can live seeing life and death as parts of the same wonderfully mysterious world, and also see ourselves as a fantastic part of nature and other people, equally significant. dealing with life, and the deaths of people as we live, is the only real relevant challenge we face, it seems. mourning is natural in my opinion. we must give ourselves time to adjust and transform as a result of loss (as judith butler notes). as long as we stay humble and in the moment, though, our own deaths need not plague our realities. this is all a lot easier to preach than to practice. changing mentalities takes a lot of work, and a conscious effort to alter ones attitudes and conceptions. i think for me it will be worth doing.

lots of love.
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replied January 17th, 2010
Scared of Dying
I have just found this site. And in couraged that i am not alone. I fear Death. The unknown, the finality of it.
The reason behind our existance. I agee, living for ever has it's draw back's. But to die and live forever.Also has it's fears.
But to leave a beautiful world. Is very hard to bear
I am about to lose a dear friend to Cancer. And has brought all my fears to the surface.
I know you have to live your life and not worry about the inevitable. But it's power to consume me is so powerful.And stops me living my life to the full
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Tags: Depression
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