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Pulling Out of Depression

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i am a 22 year old male

for a while now i believed that i wasnt depressed,

but my girlfriend is fed up with me and a previous job is not available anymore to me, because i would sleep in and not perform as expected,

i dont know where life is leading me and that upsets me greatly,
i know what my qualities are, but i would rather just waste it away,

i dont really indulge in any vices, such as alcohol or drugs,
i am not a gamer
for a time i delved into pornography as an escape, but it was short lived and i am definitely out of that stage
i just sleep, or chill somewhere,

people have described me as extremely emotional, and i could be really happy one moment and depressed the next,

it hurt my girlfriend very much, when we were dealing with an issue, and i sounded like i only cared about myself and in truth it was that way for some time,
she wants me to seek therapy, but i know what i need to do, i just lack the motivation to do it,

how can i show her and the people around me that i am changing and making myself better?

do i need therapy?

strangely, on the threat of breaking up, i didnt get more depressed, it actually made me commit more strongly to my responsabilities, but i dont know how long that will last, maybe that was just an initial rush, and i will just crash later

let me know what you think,
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replied November 1st, 2007
but what do i do to show the people around me,

they think its way more serious than i do, and wnat me to seek professional help

i know what i want but no one believes me

i am glad my girlfriend is sticking with me, but for how long,
i need to show her now

i understand what you mean though, and thats the gameplan i am pursuing now,
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replied November 1st, 2007

i appreciate the understanding
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replied November 1st, 2007
i think i like your crackpot version than most normal people,

write a crackpot book

all these normal people just dont get right
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