Medical Questions > Pregnancy Forum > Getting Pregnant Forum

Me And My Boyfriend Have to Different Views On Things....

ok .i feel really pressured by my boyfriend to have sex with out a condom or some kind of protection.he wants me to get pregnant from him he tells me this everyday.im only 16 im not ready for a baby.i wanna finish school and go to college to be a crime scene investigator.right now im sorta feeling bad cause im leading him on to think that we are going to have a baby right after i finish high school.but i am scared that he will leave him if i tell him that he has to wait much longer than that.i love him too much please help...!!
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replied October 31st, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Don't have unprotected sex. No matter how much you love him, a baby will be with you the rest of your life. It will come in the way of college, high school, and everything else.

If he would leave you over wearing a rubber - a THIN peice of LATEX! - that seems a !**@!, doesn't it? What does he want for his future?
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replied October 31st, 2007
he doesnt really talk about his future.all he talks about is our future me,him,and the baby.and now where in that does he tell me what he wants to do for a living.he trys to convince me that if he wears a condom that will take out all the feeling but i know WAY better than that....
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replied October 31st, 2007
Especially eHealthy
It is your future too. Let him be responsible for his own future before you add a little baby in there. Smile Babies are full time, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. No sleeping in. No staying out late. No free fun college days where you get to live in a dorm. More like pacing the floor of your apartment with a crabby teething baby who has an ear infection. And, true, those times aren't all the time. But they are often enough not to want to jump into it too soon.

Have you considered getting on Birth Control pills? Visit planned parenthood, you may be able to get them for FREE. You be in control of your own fertility! You decide when you want to have kids. Smile
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replied October 31st, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Ingi is completely correct what she says. I understand that at the moment you don't want him to leave you so I would highly recommend going on the pill. Take it every morning before you see him and he'll be none the wiser. It's not to decieve him as such it's just I'm worried he may decieve you by putting a hole in the condom or something.
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replied October 31st, 2007
Experienced User
I wouldn't lie to him though. I agree with both Ingi and beckster, go on some sort of birth control. But don't lie to him about it. That could only make it worse if he did find out. How old is your bf? If he's only 16 too, he can't honestly be ready for a baby as well? Babies cost a lot of money and you have to be able to afford a roof over his/her head, plus food and all the necessities. Unless he's some sort of millionaire at a young age, I can't see him being ready. Yeah babies are cute and all, but like Ingi said, they are a LOT of work. Would you rather be an at-home mom, not making any money or persuing your ideal career, just to make one guy happy? I wouldn't. Really think this through. Talk with your man, and don't lie. Just be prepared for what he might say...expect the worst.
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replied October 31st, 2007
Especially eHealthy
No one ever said she should lie. In fact, I said she should be the one in control of her own fertility. And Beckster said it isn't to deceive him. She she be a strong, proud woman who has her destiny at her own feet. Not the feet of a man.
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replied November 2nd, 2007
my boyfriend is 18 years old todayis his birthday.and i dont wanna go behind his back so i think that i`ll just talk to him about the pill.and i know that he will not like it but he will grow to like it.if he loves me like he says then he will understand that i wanna persue my dream career.like kitten said ill just hold tight and expect the worst.i hope he understand.......ill get back too you guys and let you know how it went..
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replied November 2nd, 2007
Experienced User
Just put it to him that you want to get on the pill to protect yourself. If it is meant for you to be pregnant then it is still possible to get pregnant even on birth control. We all know it isnt on 100% effective. Good luck. I hope he is understanding.
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replied November 2nd, 2007
Experienced User
Just put it to him that you want to get on the pill to protect yourself. If it is meant for you to be pregnant then it is still possible to get pregnant even on birth control. We all know it isnt on 100% effective. Good luck. I hope he is understanding.
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replied November 4th, 2007
Manipulated
Do you have parents? Would you dare to ask them for advice on this important matter?

Probably, you would say you don't want to talk to a parent now. So let's say you look at it as if YOU'RE the parent...of a 16 year old girl in this situation you're in.

What would you want your daughter to do? Get pregnant at 16, and ditch a promising future (that would include a proper family life) for a baby NOW? What is the hurry??

You are being manipulated by your bf, who is looking out for his own bizarre interests...not yours. You might love him, but he only loves himself. The remedy? Dump him...just that simple. Say goodbye and don't look back.

You will have plenty of other gentlemen taking an interest in you...and I suggest you stick to your education for now, and find a fine gentleman in a few years who can support you and the family you'll likely have.

Meanwhile, the guy you're with now is a disaster waiting to happen...for you...and he'll just walk out on you if things get tough.

So cut that emotional rope that's tying you to him... You can do it. He'll ruin your future...a future which is still in your hands, until you get pregnant by him.

Meanwhile, if you do this thing...you're asking to be a grandmother at 35...cause your kid will justify HER behaviour 16 years from now, by your own behavior now.

Take charge, kid. You are barely old enough to grasp the concept...but sometimes teenagers can show amazing mettle by doing just that... Getting in the driver's seat and steering away from trouble.
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