Medical Questions > Relationships > Relationships and Marriage Forum

Relationship: I Confronted My Guy About His Baby Mama.. (Page 1)

Well It all starts wit my boyfriends baby mama. She doesn't bother us but she constantly send pictures of his kid all the time. Its gotten so annoying, cause she.ll send pictures at 2am 3am in the morning while we.re trying to sleep. I kno she has the rite to send them but I told him to tell her to be considerate of our relationship cause we live together.

I mean come on how different is the kid gonna get from one day to another?lol

She send pictures of her waking up, eating, sleeping, playing etc. Anything! So I confronted him about it and even he is annoyed but doesn't want to say anything cause he
thinks she.ll get mad at me.

Was it wrong of me to say something? I think I was ok cause its interfiering in our relationship
Did you find this post helpful?
|

replied September 24th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
So she sends pictures to him of his kid? I don't see the harm.

If it is to his cell phone and it wakes you up, turn off the phone so you don't hear it at 2am.

You will never, ever be rid of her. She is in your life as much as that baby is going to be in your lives. How old is this child?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 24th, 2007
Experienced User
Re: I Confronted My Guy About His Baby Mama..
Well It all starts wit my boyfriends baby mama. She doesn't bother us but she constantly send pictures of his kid all the time. Its gotten so annoying, cause she.ll send pictures at 2am 3am in the morning while we.re trying to sleep. I kno she has the rite to send them but I told him to tell her to be considerate of our relationship cause we live together.

I mean come on how different is the kid gonna get from one day to another?lol

She send pictures of her waking up, eating, sleeping, playing etc. Anything! So I confronted him about it and even he is annoyed but doesn't want to say anything cause he
thinks she.ll get mad at me.

Was it wrong of me to say something? I think I was ok cause its interfiering in our relationship[/quote]
your treading on a very fine line. Dont mess with a father and his kid. Who cares about the baby momma. Its the baby that matters.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 24th, 2007
Experienced User
Ok...maybe I didn't put in enough info but like I said even he is annoyed at her that ever since we got together the flow of her sending pictures has gotten worst.

he's told me she knows that there is a 2hr difference, she knows we live together, yet she does it regardless. I even wonder how her boyfriend puts up wit it. The kid is 4 almost 5 this year. They were young when she got pregnant. She wanted to keep it and he didn't because he was in the military and they both weren't ready.

Thing is they we're jus Friends with benefits, no love it was jus mutual sex. so when she had the kid, he had to come back home to California. He never bonded with the kid because he never wanted it.

He is responcible in sending child support and all that. In the beginning he had suggested he send the kid 300 a month till she turned 18. But she wanted to take him to court since he didn't want to stay with her. In the end the court told him to pay only 250 and that pissed her off even more.

I know that's his kid and I respect that. I love him just the same. But I think that after being with him for a year as the current girlfriend I have some rite in making myself heard.

All I told him was to please jus tell her to respect what me and him have, and to try not to send pics so late or early.

You guys really jus went and almost ripped my head off just for trying to make myself heard lol
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied September 24th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
like the other said why don't he turn off the phone at night? That would solve the problem in no time.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 24th, 2007
Experienced User
But he.a gotta turn it back on at some point lol. Thank you for the advice, maybe I should jus put up with it since she is way more important than me,...I'm just the girlfriend
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 24th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
i think hes got the right to see pictures of the kids and she has a right to send them

and if he hasnt confrunted her about it then hes obviously not that annoyed by it
most men will say something if they really feel annoyed or threatened
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied September 24th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
But he.a gotta turn it back on at some point lol. Thank you for the advice, maybe I should jus put up with it since she is way more important than me,...I'm just the girlfriend[/quote]

oh no it's not because you are just the girlfriend. Even if you become the wife this woman will continue to be the mother of his child..sounds like you are jealous at this point and you shouldn't be. If I were you I would just ignore the calls. Just tell your man that sending the pics doesn't bother you it's the fact of the noise of the phone and just suggest him to put the phone at night in silence mode.

I can understand why you bother because I had bf's with children before and I didn't liked many of the things I went through (hence that's why I decided not to ever get involved with a man with children) It is tought but oh well you have to learn to cope with it best possible. Remember that if you marry this man, the child will become your stepchild so you should look for healthy relationships with all parts.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 25th, 2007
Experienced User
Its not just the noise, we were having sex once and he had the nerve to pick up the phone and txt her back while still going at it!lol its funny now but I was so pissed.

Plus it doesn't help that lately he hasn't been as interested in me sexualy, he.s quiet, isn't as touchy and loving as he used to. But that's a whole different subject :/
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 25th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Its not just the noise, we were having sex once and he had the nerve to pick up the phone and txt her back while still going at it!lol its funny now but I was so angered.

Plus it doesn't help that lately he hasn't been as interested in me sexualy, he.s quiet, isn't as touchy and loving as he used to. But that's a whole different subject :/[/quote]

wow sounds like he isnt really annoyed with her
if i were you i would have threw his phone in the toilet when he did that
thats BS
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 26th, 2007
Experienced User
She is excited about the little things, this is what happens when you have kids, you take pictures of their first poop for goodness sake. The excessive pictures are not a big deal if he hasn't said anything and I am sure that he enjoys getting them but she is being inconsiderate by sending them at that time. I would just tell him to tell her that he loves the pictures but that everytime she sends them it wakes him up and that he has to get up for work in the morning and can't get a good night sleep when the phone is going off in the middle of the night. Could she please send them in the morning or earlier in the evening or he could just turn the phone off at night. It's really not that big of a deal but when it comes to someone and their babys mother or their children it's a touchy thing.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 27th, 2007
Experienced User
I could be a little jealous, since the difference between me and her is I love him very much...
I can't have kids, so I guess its just female jealousy. But aside from that I.d like to get a good nights sleep. But I.ll leave him alone regarding the pictures. Its his buisness and if he has to deal with her annoying him so much then I.ll let him deal wit it
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 27th, 2007
Experienced User
May I Suggest
how about getting a new phone number /or phone that she has no access to ?????if she is not driving over and stopping by then this should help your issues .....best wishes
wazzywoman / robin
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 27th, 2007
Experienced User
She lives in Texas, we live in California lol so I'm glad for that. Cause of child support he.a forced to keep the same number. But I.ll make sure when we finally get a house phone she doesn't get that number. But thank you to everyone for your thoughts
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 27th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
I don't know what law would force someone to keep the same number. Child support won't. If there is a parenting plan, she does have the right to have his telephone number. That may be what it is.

Have you talked to him about this? About how much it bothers you when he drops you for these picture calls? (especially during sex. GAH! If anyone answered the phone during sex with me, I know I'd feel really let down ~ in more ways than one!)

Maybe he can set the ringer to a 'special' ring when it is her, so he'll know that he can look at the pictures later.

Good luck.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 29th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
the_girlfreind wrote:
Its not just the noise, we were having sex once and he had the nerve to pick up the phone and txt her back while still going at it!lol its funny now but I was so angered.

Plus it doesn't help that lately he hasn't been as interested in me sexualy, he.s quiet, isn't as touchy and loving as he used to. But that's a whole different subject :/


wow sounds like he isnt really annoyed with her
if i were you i would have threw his phone in the toilet when he did that
thats BS[/quote]

That is sick. I'd dump him.

It sounds like the child's mother is sending so many pictures so she can piss off your boyfriend.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied September 29th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
the_girlfreind wrote:
Its not just the noise, we were having sex once and he had the nerve to pick up the phone and txt her back while still going at it!lol its funny now but I was so angered.

Plus it doesn't help that lately he hasn't been as interested in me sexualy, he.s quiet, isn't as touchy and loving as he used to. But that's a whole different subject :/


wow sounds like he isnt really annoyed with her
if i were you i would have threw his phone in the toilet when he did that
thats BS[/quote]

I agree with girlfriend.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied September 29th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
If he was really annoyed by it, he wouldn't answer at inconvenient times. You can just ignore cell phones.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 30th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
futureshock wrote:
the_girlfreind wrote:
Its not just the noise, we were having sex once and he had the nerve to pick up the phone and txt her back while still going at it!lol its funny now but I was so angered.

Plus it doesn't help that lately he hasn't been as interested in me sexualy, he.s quiet, isn't as touchy and loving as he used to. But that's a whole different subject :/


wow sounds like he isnt really annoyed with her
if i were you i would have threw his phone in the toilet when he did that
thats BS


That is sick. I'd dump him.

It sounds like the child's mother is sending so many pictures so she can piss off your boyfriend.[/quote]

futershock is that collie and aussie your dogs?!?!?!? theyre freaking beautiful
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 30th, 2007
Experienced User
I'm sure She's trying to stay buddy buddy with him even tho they have a kid. And yea I feel she just does it to annoy or maybe even throw it in his face that she had his kid when he didn't want it. But anyways I'm already learning to ignore it even if it did happen again this morning :/ she txts him for advice on how to not mess up her relationship and that just makes me laugh and roll my eyes. Lol who would txt their baby daddy for love advice?lo

I jus hope her man learns to deal wit it, my advice to her would be to not send so many pictures or her guy might jus end up not being able to deal wit it and leave her.


My boyfriend is going to get to the point were he can't take it and hopefully he.ll do something about it. And he mentioned that we get a house phone and I said yes, but I prohibit him from giving her our number. Its enough that I have to hear from her a couple of times a week early in the morning lol
|
Did you find this post helpful?
12