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Please Need Advice Asap

I have a question, im 33 years old , I have a 14 year old son , I really want another baby but I am so scared, I have a great husband who isnt the father of my first and I know he would love to have a child of his own, I feel like im to old, then I think 14 years is a huge gap to be having another child, im so use to my routine now, sleeping all night, not having to worry about a baby sitter, etc, but then I think of all the great things a baby can bring, im like so nervous, I dont know if im being selfish, or what, I told my husband I wanted to try he had tears, he was so excited he told everyone, I would feel horrible to back out now, my son says hes excited and would love to have a baby, god I feel like crying, has any one ever felt like this, am I to old to have a child, also im kind of nervous because my first son was 2 months premature, I have 2 herniated disk in my lower back, and 2 bulging disk in my neck, so I worry about that my orhtropedic doctor said I should be fine although I will probally half to have a c section, I would just like to hear someone elses input, also is there anything like position wise to have a girl , I heard it was up to the man to determine the sex, just curious please somebody help me
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replied March 9th, 2004
Not Too Late
Bootsie
hello, I am 32 years old and have 2 boys who are 11 & 9. I had my tubes tied and then ended up remarrying a guy who has no children. I had a reversal done 1 1/2 years ago and we are ttc. I was like you at first and in the same routines,but between myself, my husband and my boys, we all would love to have a little girl around the house. Don't think your too old, think how young she will make you feel when your holding her in your arms. I wish you the best of luck and i'll be praying and sprinkling baby dust for you.
Cin
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replied March 9th, 2004
Experienced User
Thank you for your input, thats just it knowing how great it would be to hold a baby again, I know if I dont try now, and years past I will probally reret it, I know my husband will be a great dad, hes raised my son for 10 years and is wonderfull to him better than his own father, I guess because it has been 14 years, its been a long time, I think its just the whole idea again thats scary
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replied March 9th, 2004
I hear what your saying. Scares me too. Anymore though, you hear woman getting pregnant at 40 and older. I couldn't do that. I would like to be done by 35 at the latest. I want to be able to enjoy life after their older. Best of luck.
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replied March 10th, 2004
Experienced User
You are not to old, that is for sure. My parents had their last child whom is now eight, when they were 37. So too old, no. Having a child is a wonderful thing, and after she came into your life i'm sure it wouldnt bother you that she made you change your schedule around. Its all worth it.
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replied March 12th, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
I was 33 when I had my daughter & almost 40 when I had my son & I admit it was hard going back to dealing with nappies etc etc & as I too have serious back, hip & knee problems among other things I know what you mean re worries about coping with the pregnancy & birth much less the carrying (esp.With all that baby gear!!) the baby afterwards - & they do insist on growing & gaining weight before they can walk etc etc!!

It was hard, to go back to having a baby around & it has taken a toll on my health but I wouldn't be without him for anything, all the pain relief or lack of health problems in the universe wouldn't make up for not having him.

In terms of surviving the pregnancy, take calcium, iron, multivitamin & damn there's another one that you should be taking before you fall that reduces the chances of health problems for the baby, damn it. Get rest but also keep up gentle exercise so as to stay fit, eat healthy foods, prepare as much as possible before hand (like getting nappies etc etc etc so that you don't have to worry about all that for abit after the birth).

For both of mine I chose to bottle feed & in terms of age & health that was a god send the second time around as it meant my husband could do more & that allowed me to get rest when I needed it. You also might get your older son's help (but don't count on it, at 14 he has his own life & friends & you don't want to risk him going off the rails due to jealousy & annoyance at always having to babysit etc).

As to improving your chances of having a girl>> sperm that create boys swim fast but die sooner, sperm which create girls swim slower & conserve their energy so last longer therefore if you have sex right at the time of ovulation you're more likely to have a boy (which is why the vast majority of ivf babies are boys) & if you have sex a couple of days before you ovulate you increase your chances of having a girl. But nothing is foolproof. I've read other ways to improve your chances but don't recall them maybe trya search engine & something like how do I increase my chances of conceiving a girl.
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