Medical Questions > Womens Health > Infertility Forum

struggled with infertility, have had 11 IUIs,4 miscarriages

I have a question I have been wrestling with. I would like input from any of you, weather good or bad. I want a baby SOOO bad, and I know I could give this baby a wonderful home. I have struggled with infertility, have had 11 IUIs,4 miscarriages,.....and I don't know weather or not to continue. If I have a child will it have these same fertility struggles? If so, is it really fair for me to have a child? Is that nature saying "We don't want any of your genetic material?" I just wonder sometimes. And if that IS the case, why am I....and many other women in my position.... still programmed with that strong urge and need to nurture and love? Infant and young child adoption only seems to be open to wealthy people now....which is unfortunate. If things were like this 40 years ago I would be short three siblings and life just wouldn't be the same without them. Go figure. I know many people who have tried taking in older children (9 years up through teens) and it just hasn't gone well for the majority of them. The children don't seem to ever bond no matter what the fosters/adoptive parents do. Some of the children are actually actively harmful to animals and other people. So I am not exactly open to older children. What would you do if you were in my place?
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replied March 16th, 2014
Hello... my heart aches for you. I wish I could give you what you wanted! I was adopted when I was 9 years old along with 3 other siblings of mine. The oldest was 11 another 10, myself, and another 7. I just want to say that we meshed in perfectly with the family. My adopted parents already had 7 of their own. There were things that we had to work out but things did work out. I am so very grateful for my parents that they had the faith and will to give us a try. I don't know who or where I would be if it wasn't for their willingness. On your other point.. I my oldest sister tried for years and years to have children and couldn't. Here is her story.. maybe it can help you more then I could! I wish you the very best! God bless you!
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replied April 5th, 2014
I honestly believe that a couple can try too hard! Relax a bit...take in a hobby that will distract you...vacation with your hubby and enjoy life! I tried to get preggo for 9 years and nothing...lost myself in the process, adoption is a love in itself my dear! Bonding comes instantly when you adopt for the right reason. If you doubt the bonding before your not ready!
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