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Well, most people (if I am not wrong) write here probably because they are single, struggling to find a girlfriend or a life partner. I wouldn't mind if you call me single but I wouldn't say I am struggling to find a girlfriend. It's rather that I don't want to make a girlfriend (!) in the sense that the girls (I am not sure if I should use the term girls or I should say woman, whatever!) I see in my university I don't feel like making them as girlfriends.

I mean the way I take life simply doesn't match the way they view life as. I don't know why. I guess they are normal but I am the most weird fellow on earth. I see them making a lot of boyfriends and then changing every two months. That's where I have a problem. I can't imagine myself changing girlfriends every two months. I am just not like that. I believe more in building a long term relationship. To me it makes no sense to make as many girlfriends as I can and then end up sleeping with as many of them as I can. I just can't accept that. I am just not like that.

Most girls in my university are bit of a show-of type and I don't feel interested in building a relationship with such girls. They are simply too busy with their make-ups, hairstyle,clothing, and all those related stuffs. It's as if they are more about the make-ups they put on than the person that they are. For me, the clothes that I wear doesn't show my personality; what makes me a good person is the integrity that I firmly stand on. I mean I wouldn't mind trying a new hairstyle but I guess, at the end of the day, I guess that's not who I am. I guess I am more about the person that I am.

They are more busy in judging a person from outside instead of trying to know a person from inside. I wouldn't say they don't have emotions (that's obviously not possible since every human being has emotion) but they are not the girl I look for. I look for a girl who does not have to be extremely beautiful but an average looking girl with perhaps a few spots on the face. I guess she would look more beautiful in my eyes when she doesn't try to hide those spots with heavy make-up. Recently, I saw an advertisement on a certain channel about a certain beauty cream that is claimed to remove facial spots. I was quiet amazed to see how the model, in my eyes, was looking more beautiful with some mild spots here and there than she looked when she was without those spots after using the so called beauty cream. To be honest, she almost looked liked being as good as an angel when she had those spots in her face. She looked very down to earth and seemed like having a natural beauty. However, when those spots were gone, she seemed to be arrogant to me!

I am not saying I wouldn't like my girlfriend (if at all I end up making one!) putting make-ups but I expect her not to get herself too much into the world of make-ups, luxurious clothing, backbiting, and most importantly judging me or others only from outside. At the end of the it's not about how beautiful she is but its rather how good she is as a person.

To be honest, they are just too busy in some sort of a luxurious (I know this is not the right adjective but at this moment I can't remember a better one!) competition. It seems for them it's all about who is wearing the latest fashion and who is using the most expensive cosmetics. The more expensive clothes you were, the better you are!!!

By the way, it's not that I don't look good which makes me unable to make girlfriends. In fact, nobody has ever told me ugly. To be more specific, most people have told me I look good. However, I am not all about how I look, I am more about how honest I am. I just can't flatter anyone. I speak out what have in my heart and sometimes people get me otherwise. Even then, I think I don't back away from speaking for the just cause.

Finally, I have tried my best not to be judgmental over here. Sometimes it's very difficult to draw a fine line between harshly judging someone and giving your honest personal opinion. I am NOT saying all women are like what I described above. I know there are some extremely good women in this world for whom I am still looking for! I am NOT trying to say I am right and others are wrong. I am only a human being and my interpretation of matters is obviously NOT flawless. It's always possible others are right and I am just the weird fellow. I am just trying to understand others and judging myself. For those of you (especially women) who feel offended by this post, I sincerely APOLOGIZE. I am not a man of God nor I am a saint or something like that. I am as good as you guys out there and I make mistakes. So those of you who are thinking to go into an argument with me which is not so constructive, PLEASE DON'T.
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replied June 4th, 2009
Offended? Nah, why would I be Wink

I think that it's not just women, but men who are drawn into a materialistic, quick-fix (hence the preoccupation with outward appearances and short term relationships) lifestyle. It's what society wants, so that they can get the most money from us and so on. Also, it's to do with the drive to fit in - you have to act a certain way etc. Sadly, that's what it has come to.

I appreciate honesty. It's more valuable than empty flattery. DO NOT become like that please! Stay true to yourself. It's good to know that you realise that you are not perfect (as we all aren't) and your views are not flawless, because that means that you are open minded. Keep this way and you'll meet some great people for sure!
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Users who thank musicspirit for this post: concernedn 

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replied June 5th, 2009
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Thanks for those great advice! I mean it since I DON'T like flattering.

Yes, I agree with you in that it's not just woman but men are also equally materialistic. Since I was talking about making girlfriends, I talked only about the girls that I meet in my University. I am very aware of the fact, there are good women as well. The issue of man being materialistic simply didn't come up because of the very same reason. I hope you understand.

Thanks once again for all that you said. Your reply was inspiring and I will try to learn from it as much as I can. I MEAN what I say, NO EMPTY FLATTERY, as you are saying!
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