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recovered anorexic, still really body conscious around the bf

I had anorexia between the ages of 14-17 due to I beleive a need for control in a time when my father was violent. i'me now 19 and have managed to recover without counselling to the point where I eat properly, maintain a healthy weight and rarely feel panicked about eating or my appearance.
However i'me still really conscious about being naked around my boyfriend, to the extend where I don't think I can truly enjoy sex because im so conscious of it. I tried explaining it to him and I don't think he really gets that all of this started because of other issues (its too early to talk about domestic violence I simply told him it was about control) not just vanity. Hes obviously sympathetic but (even after plenty of reasurance from me) I can tell he thinks that its a reflection of his "performance".
I was just wondering if anyone else is going through this? Any advice on how to get these thoughts out of my head? Also a male perspective on how I can get him to understand its not him would be lovely.
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replied January 10th, 2011
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Hi gabrielle505 and welcome to ehealth: I used to be the way that you are...I still wonder why all those years I wanted sex under the covers...But I did...All I can say is let it out...Forget the embarrassment...You are one hot woman....Show what you got...Honey, when you have overcome what you and I have, celebrate life....From my husband's male perspective....He used to get really bugged....Now, he calls me his Porn Queen....Take care...

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