Hey, i recently moved into a new house with uni friends and i'm finding it difficult to find things to talk about with them. I feel i'm boring or unable to relax. Back at home, i have no trouble joking around with my friends but here i find myself quiet and "not wanting to talk", i become upset and withdrawal into myself, but i try to force myself to make convo but i'm never laughing, it's always small talk and it's making me upset. I feel alienated whenever one of them leaves the house or talks to another of the housemates and bypass my room. I go and talk to them but they don't seem to come to me as much and i feel it's because i never have anything to say, this makes my confidence drop with other people as well including my family which im ashamed to admit. I get depressed alot because i miss home and i know i would feel good about living away from home if i had reli close friends to share i with. At the moment it's he 2nd day of the moving so i should give it time but i want to them but they all feel so comfortable around eachother and i dont. Feeling sad about this also makes the problem worse since the more sad i feel, the more quiet i get, it's a vicious circle but i feel like im forcing myself and that doesnt make me feel happy.
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replied September 15th, 2010
I think you need to give things a bit of time. I remember when I moved to university and I had a rough time in the beginning -- I felt all alone and alienated. But as time passed, I got to know more people and places and things worked out well. I will suggest that you join some activities or clubs in the university -- play some sports, go to the gym or the swimming pool. You are going through the initial discomfort. You will just do fine.
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