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I am 50 and up to 2 years ago had a fairly happy life. My mum was diagnosed with terminal cancer and I helped nurse her through to the end. She died 19 months ago. A fews after that a love affair broke up suddenly which caused me intense emotional pain (and still does). 6 months ago I was diagnosed myself with cancer and underwent chemo. My treatment finished 9 weeks ago and I have been granted a partial response to the treatment. My problem is one fear. For the past 2 years I have this fear inside that completely overwhelms me. I am terrified and do not know why or what I am scared of. I have a knot in my stomach now as I type and tears are in my eyes. Somedays I am totally in a place that I don't recognise where I have this fear and I just sit and cry. Do you know what is wrong with me?

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replied March 7th, 2011
Depression Answer A20498

I am sorry for what you have been going through. You are putting up a brave fight with the situation and that itself increases your chances of winning.

I will be doing injustice to your question if I said I have an answer ready. It is difficult for me to guess at this stage what your fear is about and where it is coming from. But I can assure you that you will be able to find it out with persistence and a structured approach. If haven't been to a therapist yet, please consider going to one soon. Fear is nothing more than 'unnatural anxiety' or 'unhealthy anxiety'. The presence of fear suggests you are anxious about something 'bad' happening to you or to your dear ones. This is usually the case, but certainly not the rule.

When you are in that place with the fear, can you try and recognize your thoughts going on in your mind? Will it be possible for you to jot them down, to be analysed later? If you can do this, you are prepared for the road to recovery.

Please let me know your thoughts on this. The eHealthForum team is with you.

Take care.

Abhijeet Deshmukh, MD

(This post is for the purpose of providing medical information and is not a substitute for a face-to-face consultation with a doctor. This post is not intended to give or rule out a diagnosis, create a doctor-patient relationship or replace an existing one. I am not able to diagnose medical conditions online. Please consult with your doctor or a qualified healthcare provider for diagnosis and treatment options)
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