Background;
I have 2 sons that won't speak to me. Almost 2 years ago my youngest son fathered a child out of wedlock. My granddaughter lived with her mother. Last year, children's services removed her from the home. I have been working towards gaining custody. So many really bad things have happened this past year stemming from this situation.
I have been engaged to a man for 11 years, lived with him for the last 7 in a house we bought together. We were to get married Sep 12. We waited so we could be better off financially and for some other reasons. Now he informs me he doesn't know if he loves me. The wedding has been called off of course. He won't talk and acts like he doesn't want to be around me. He was my rock and my constant through all of this mess.
With this new development, I can no longer seek custody.
I feel like everyone that should love me, doesn't and now I have no one left in my life. I am losing my granddaughter because she will be taken permanently by children's services (adopted out) and once they take permanent custody, you are no longer considered a relative.
It is hard to go on feeling like no one truly cares about me. I don't really have friends. They have their own lives and families and I am only an after thought.
I don't know what to expect as a answer, but I really don't know what to do or where to turn. I don't know whether to fight to try to make him care about me again, or should I just let things go. Do I keep trying to get him to talk, or just let things stay silent between us until he decides what he wants to do?
I am not sleeping much as I can't get my mind to stop at night. I dread evenings and bedtime. I have taken an over the counter medication for several nights without much success but this isn't something I want to keep doing.
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replied August 19th, 2009
im not an expert nor have i ever been married. but if you have been engaged for 11 years i would say thats a big part of your life worth fighting for. i am sorry to hear about your grandaughter, i wish you the best of luck with that situation. my advice to you is to maybe see your dr and talk about an anti-depressant and something to help you sleep at night. keep your head up, once you hit rock bottom there is nowhere else to go but back up. good luck
nikki
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replied August 20th, 2009
thanks Nikki. I tried lexapro for hot flashes a few years ago, it sent me into a tissy even when I only took 1/4 of a tablet. I have a low tolerance for medicines. I haven't had a family dr for a few years and it is hard to start a new one under these circumstances. But I know I am going to have to do something. I think I am at my limit of stuff on my plate.
True about the rock bottom! I figure there are only a couple more major issues that can happen to me. Sometimes you feel like you are waiting for the other shoe to drop, if you know what I mean. thanks for the reply. good wishes to you also.
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replied August 20th, 2009
thanks Nikki. I tried lexapro for hot flashes a few years ago, it sent me into a tissy even when I only took 1/4 of a tablet. I have a low tolerance for medicines. I haven't had a family dr for a few years and it is hard to start a new one under these circumstances. But I know I am going to have to do something. I think I am at my limit of stuff on my plate.
True about the rock bottom! I figure there are only a couple more major issues that can happen to me. Sometimes you feel like you are waiting for the other shoe to drop, if you know what I mean. thanks for the reply. good wishes to you also.
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