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Need help getting over my first love

Hi
I need help getting over my first love. I am 25 years old and have never been in a relationship before this year. I have been dating this girl for over a year now. I am so in love with her but deep down i know she is not the one for me. For the most part we agree on things, but when it come to some issues where i draw the line she is unwilling to budge. I was apprehensive at first of going out with her, it was she who chased me. She gave me the impression that she wanted to be a part of my life and that it was soemthing missing from hers. I was always very secluded and never trusted anyone with my emotions as i have been scarred in the past. So i though i could trust this one but it turns out she is exactly the same. She says she loves me but she is not willing to change her ways (and by that i mean things like getting drunk everytime she goes out, having dinner with multiple 'guy' friends and basically just lying to me about the dumbest things). We always have a great time together when we are alone but as soon as we get back to the real world she goes all crazy. Anyways we have broken up but i really need help, i am very reserved kind of guy and dont really show my emotions but deep down inside i am dying. I really wish things could have worked out. I know it wont but its just really hard to let go of all those emotions, wondering what she is doing and who she is with, if she is thinking about me. The worst part is we work togther and she sits right next to me so i can hear all her phone calls and stuff. I have already arranged to move desks but it still doesnt help the fact that i really do miss her and wish she would just do what she needs to do for us to be together. Someone please tell me what i can do. is there any services in sydney that anyone knows of where i can talk with someone face to face. i really cant talk to friends or family about this, but i feel like im going to explode!
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replied November 30th, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
Sorry to hear what your going through..you need to sit her down and talk about it..see if you can come to some arrangement because you obviously still love her and im thinking she loves you to so maybe come up with certain rules for you both and see where you go from there...Jenny
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