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My Father says his wife comes before his children

I am not married so please tell me if I am wrong but it makes me sad to know that my Father has told me on several occasions that his wife (my Step Mother) comes before me and always before me.

My sister did not like my Step Mother at first and he cut off all contact with her because of it.

He says I am wrong to think that his children should come before his wife.

Am I wrong to think this?

I know if I ever have children one day they will most certainly come before anyone else.

I have no one to talk to about this. So, I have come here for advice.
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replied July 6th, 2015
help
can someone please help I know people are reading this. please.
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replied July 6th, 2015
can someone please help with advice? or anything? your POV?
I see people reading this but no replies, please.
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replied July 6th, 2015
sorry for posting twice in a row I cannot see my own replies I thought the first did not go through.
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replied July 6th, 2015
I'm going to try another forum I cant see anything to even read this
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replied July 6th, 2015
My kids definitely come before my husband, but I also know that the best thing I can give my kids is parents who are happily married so I also have to prioritize things that make me feel happy in marriage.

Go with your gut feeling. Hugs and best wishes to you. If you're still searching for help you might find some here... Brunstad.org
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replied November 1st, 2016
Hi Noonbutme,
You have asked a very good question and I too would like to see replies on this issue.

My husband and I are now separated because 1, he is abusive, 2 he ran my children away from the home. 3, we are a blended family but he treats my children very different from his
He has 2 daughters now 13 and 15
Mine are now a daughter 24, a son 29 and another son 21.
When I met him my youngest was only 11. He now lets his 2 children do the things that he would not allow my children to do. Mine were punished. He has excuses for everything that they do, that they shouldn't be doing. They do not have any consequences. I wasn't allowed to take my children with me with out any grief when I went out, but I was allowed to take his. He takes his daughters with him everywhere and I mean everywhere. He has done this from day one but I thought as they got older things would be different. They arent! He is a contractor for building houses and they sit in his truck or are at every job he goes to. They are in all of his business, conversations etc. Sure, there is a whole lot more to this story for example: we could never keep a sitter for more than a week. They made grown women cry. They all quit, some of them didn't even come back to be paid. His youngest gave us the most trouble and this school year she was put into an alternative school for behavior. My husband claims that everyone picks on her, that is what he has claimed from day one. I feel that I took his children in as they were my own. Him on the other hand, did not do this for mine. Basically I feel that he has let his 2 daughters run over top of me and my children, and run my home. I feel very slighted as my husband has put his children before me and now I live with the guilt of being such a horrible parent to my own children. Why are his children better than mine. Everyone should be treated equally, no exceptions! I've always felt that his children had more say than I and if they told him to jump, he would jump.
I am curious myself what people think of your question. It seems no one wants to reply on certain subjects and I understand as they are very sensitive to many. I believe the husband and wife should come first before the children. The children will benefit from seeing their parents in love and in a healthy relationship. Everything else will fall into place.
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