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My boyfriends bipolar is tearing me apart

I'm seeking desperate advice as I am deeply unhappy. I have been with my boyfriend for 9 months now and when I first met him he was so sweet and attentive and we fell in love pretty much right away. About a month into the relationship he confided in me for having bi polar type 2. I wasn't quite sure what it was but I started seeing signs one night when I had a shower at his house, the sucker the shower head fell off and he shouted at me out of nowhere, i had never seen him react like that before, he apologised right away and begged me to forgive him as it's just his bipolar and he gets irritated by small things.

Since then we tend to have an argument once or twice a week without fail, when things are good though, things are absolutely amazing, I've never met a more romantic, devoted boyfriend. But the down moments are too much to handle. We went to a concert together and he fell out with me over money issues when it had nothing to do with what was going on. He threatened to lock me out of the house and says things like "if you don't like it, LEAVE" but he retracts the statement when he's back to his normal self. He says nasty awful things to me and always goes back to telling me to leave if I don't accept it, but he deep down doesn't want me to.

Last night and tonight was the ultimate, we went shopping and for some drinks in town on our day off together and I apparently 'forced' him to go because he was too tired but he went for me, while we wer out he messed about pretending to pour ketchup on me and I flinched and knocked both our beers over wasting the money I had just spent, instead of laughing it off, he accused me of not trusting him to not pour sauce on me saying "shows how little you trust me doesn't it!" Then he fell out with me saying "I'm going to go to the toilet, then I'm going home, you can do what you want!" I followed him in fits of tears pleading for him to forgive me ( for something I didn't even know what I had done) then when we got home he stormed off to bed and I had to plead him to come round, he ended up crying and telling me he doesn't know why he acts like he does and he apologised to me. He said I don't do anything wrong and I'm the best thing to ever happen to him and he doesn't want me to leave and he said "I've never been as happy as I am with you, we were having such a lovely day and I had to go around and ruin it! It's like my brain tells me I don't deserve to be happy so it try's to ruin it all the time" I held him and told him everything is going to be ok and I stand by him, but tonight I am not sure if it was a bipolar episode or not.

We were having tea and I had finished mine and put the pots away, my boyfriend had ketchup and mayo with his and he lay the sauces down beside me on the couch, they were however in my way of sitting comfortably so I set them down on the floor beside his feet thinking nothing of it. Then my boyfriend asks where his sauces are as he wants them, I said "here you are, handing them to him off the floor and he turns around and says "why did you move my sauces?! Do I MESS AROUND WITH YOUR FOOD WHILST YOUR EATING? No! I don't! So don't do it!" I was baffled and couldn't figure out why he was so upset over something so trivial so I tried to stand up for myself and say he is being ridiculous, but he turns around and said "I sometimes wonder if your trying to annoy me on purpose, things you do irritate me sometimes! But you think it's just petty, don't you think that that's a bit disrespectful of my feelings?!" I started crying and apologising but he started making fun of my crying and said "oh please stop it your being soft"

My confidence is as low as it can get, one minute he's amazing the next I'm annoying him and I annoy him all the time without realising it. I'm not a malodours person and I'm very caring and loving. I can't make him see that getting mad over me moving some sauces is something you shouldn't be getting mad about towards someone you are in love with. I'm hurting so much right now, he is a good person and he keeps telling me that he is trying to get better but i feel like I annoy him most of the time. Can anyone help me? Was his reaction tonight justified or is he playing with my mind ?
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First Helper She0522
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replied November 27th, 2014
I am not a malicious person* sorry for the miss spelling as I am using my phone
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replied December 5th, 2014
Hey
I've been married to a bipolar person for 5 years n been together for 9 years. We have 2 kids together.he was just diagnose as having a bipolar 3 mos ago but the signs of bipolar were there ever since. We were focused on his anxiety n drinking. He was on an anti dep meds for over 15 years which made the bipolar worse. His brother which is a psychiatrist came up with the diagnosis bec he was very manic and doing awful stuff. Cheating, drinking, hyper sexual, talking a lot and annoying, name it he had it! We started on a bipolar meds n unfortunately made him manic again so we had to up the dose. A week after that he went into a deep depression! He is mad all the time, won't talk to anybody, ignore me and the kids like nobody exist around him. And still is right now so we are trying another meds. Most of the bipolar people are genuinely awesome people but their brain is gonna keep messing it up. When they r manic they tend to do a lot of bad stuff, and when they r depressed they will just isolate themselves and feel and act bad about everything. They can't control it, it's what their brain is telling them. They have impaired judgement and will not consider anybody else feelings.they don't do it on purpose. They don't know what normal is. It takes a lot to stay n be with a bipolar person but u have to remember, it's not your obligation to stay and make your life miserable. There's always a way out if u choose to leave. Nobody has to be blamed as long as they r taking their medications. They can't do it alone and they are very scared and sick people. I have to educate your self about the disease and go to a therapy to be able to
Deal with it. Never blame yourself for his actions. U were not born to get hurt and live a messy life. I am still with my bipolar husband until now bec I still love home and we have kids. But leaving will always be an option for me. Hang in there but don't push your self too much. Live your life not just around him or you r gonna end up weak and hopeless. Be strong and pray. I hope this helps. Xoxo
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replied December 18th, 2014
thank!
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replied December 18th, 2014
thank!
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