Medical Questions > Relationships > Single and Struggling Forum

men hate me because im pretty

so im always single, always alone. i can get women not liking me, out of jealousy and they don't. the problem is-- men hate me too and are even more hostile and aggressive than women. you hear of angry jealous women..who growl at women they're jealous of--well men growl at me and mistreat me out of jealousy. this is all i experience. the thing about me is, i don't get why--people are jealous of me because im pretty and instantly just hate me for no reason. though there are many other pretty women out there...no one is jealous of them or cares--mostly just me for some reason or women like me. im not stuck up, mean, the opposite in fact...super nice sweet kind-- most people just like to call me 'quiet shy' and they do that to socially dominate me, but also because i look innocent/beautiful and have a polite demeanor. people know im not stuck up but that im really nice--yet they STILL dislike and mistreat me.. i look like any hollywood actress like i have the beautiful but girl next door look. im not tall or intimidating..im petite pretty sweet girl next door...and yes beautiful but again many women are. ive been told I look like angelina jolie, catherine zeta jones, tiffany amber thiessen, katie holmes, shakira, halle berry, vivien leigh, ashwariya rai. im indian/pakistani by origin. to be honest I think i look like vivien leigh or someone similar...have a classic beauty look however also girl next door too. people have told me and used to tell me i was the most beautiful woman they had ever seen. my sadistic cruel ex said the same to me- that i was the hottest woman he had ever seen. another man said it to me last year.."there arent many or any women hotter than you." (he abused and mistreated me too and even rejected me sexually). im flattered people think this (not really) and at one point I used to think it myself however it's definitely not true. i dont care about any of this...im bringing it up because its a topic of why people mistreat me. i grew up not even knowing or thinking i was pretty at all. i didnt realize until i was 23 or 24 that i was pretty at all. i had low self esteem and didnt even notice it until i began realizing it and then i was shocked when i figured it out. so really i was just a shy sweet humble nice girl with low self esteem. however i began realizing that as i got more attractive at around 21...that's when people and men began treating me worse.

theres no logical reason why people should be jealous of me... as im kind pretty and sweet...im not arrogant...im really nice and friendly..and i dont dress up or show off...i dress down and am conservative and really down to earth and really laid back- and people KNOW this..many have said...you're just laid back and etc. however, it doesnt matter...they are STILL jealous of me and hate me and mistreat me and i dont know why. people should in fact really like me but they don't. the problem is that also MEN hate me-- men see me and just instantly reject me, mistreat me etc and if they get a chance with me they use it to use/abuse me. men ENJOY abusing me-- that's it. they will do anything to dominate degrade abuse mistreat me that's it. even sexually men reject me treat me oddly put me down etc...so imagine men just rejecting any one of those actresses over and over again for no reason. this makes no logical sense...being a beautiful woman..i cant get a boyfriend? 98% of men reject and abuse me...the other 2% are just neutral. as a result of most men being jealous of me..i can't get a boyfriend...and im forced to be single for most of my life? im also a virgin at 35...never had a REAL boyfriend and only meet psychos and jerks who try to use me or mistreat me too. its really bizarre...msot people say...oh well you're so pretty or the guy that gets you will be lucky..my social life is meeting freaks off the net who mistreat me...and worse..these same freaks will then post false info about me on the internet with my phone number..people are always mistreating me insulting me putting me down abusing me...aside from being single mistreated and abused...theres much more but..this is crazy and isnt right and what are people in this situation supposed to do...
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First Helper girl922
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replied May 20th, 2013
Extremely eHealthy
Hello,

Yours is not the first time I have read about this phenomenon and it is not only beautiful women who can suffer in those ways but also very handsome men.

Scientists claim there aren't more incestuous relationships because our odour prevents close relatives from being sexually aroused. This of course is the sort of odour our primitive ancestors used to use in order to recognise friend or foe in a similar way to how dogs behave. If odour is still with us and has an effect on our behaviour even at a subliminal or sub-conscious level then it might be impossible to discover why you are still single.

Personally I think it is something more tangible that is the problem, especially as you have had 14 years of rejection and that alone can cause the unconscious building of barriers for protection that turn others away but are unnoticeable by the person standing behind those barriers.

Personally I like pretty women - a nice smile and a clear complexion and a personality to match and none of those fine bone structures on show the fans of beauty seem to prize so highly. A pretty face without the rest of it simply isn't pretty.

Beauty is something else entirely and definitely is only skin deep.
As we can't see a picture it is impossible to judge the degree of beauty and it would take a good deal of correspondence to judge how nice you are, etc.

I suspect the answer lies, apart from those defences I mentioned earlier, in your body language, your turn of phrase, your sense of humour and similar things that help make a person attractive to others, or otherwise, regardless of how they look.

I suggest you take a long look at yourself through the eyes of others and for that you need a friend who will tell you honestly without dressing things up.

Good luck!
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replied May 21st, 2013
well, despite the fact that i have been through a lot of rejection and trauma in other things...I still come across as friendly, nice and moreso than the men im meetin who are usually cold and rude towards me. I don't want to say its body language or other things because men's behavior towards me seems to stem the minute the see or encounter me--before i even speak my first word, or do anything, so after years of analysis yes ive come to the conclusion it mostly has to do with me being attractive. yes there is energy and other things but i dont think thats it as others have told me clearly...'the man that gets you is lucky' and 'any guy that gets with you is lucky' or 'gosh you'll have no problem finding a man' and even an old man once at my job who came as a customer couldnt believe i was single- he was literally shocked...he said...how are you single??? what??? he was just genuinely shocked...he didnt believe me...he said "you can have any boy you want"??? and mostly the men i meet are males off the internet who are using the net as a medium to mistreat or use women. so no i dont think it has to do with me in any way except that men are insecure around me for some reason. also im very bubbly friendly and nice, while the men ar the boring ones who just sit there and some don't even say anything- i do all the talking because they are staring at me in silence and rudely too.

also, where i live is also a factor...as i went to another city fair and men were gawking at me...and i went to NYC at a comedy club and a comedian was telling me and my sister we're pretty and then asked about me-- ie he was interested in me--i live in florida and the men here in orlando seem to be deranged or sick or have serious issues. i think its location and situation but i still find it crazy...all of it....men also hold back with me...most men are SO turned on by me they can barely breathe around me...they are huffing and puffing and hold it back but are quick to just reject me at any notion of sexual anything. even yesterday i had a horrible experience with some jerk off the internet..he did a similar thing...treated me so oddly..and was so rude and weird.. again most men's mistreatment of me begins upon seeing me immediately...totally immediate...they SEE ME...and then there comes the mistreatment.. i am beautiful and sweet...it makes no sense..none of it does...

my beauty is not about my looks solely...its apparent i am a beautiful soul/person...it radiates from me--people know this and see it. my brother's wife...is very pretty/beautiful...and she is just a really good person too...or someone who you can see isnt just about being pretty. for me-- people can see who I am...my outward beauty is a reflection of my inner beauty--people know this..they see it all they just seem to be unable to handle it which makes no sense. it makes no sense as to why men see this beautiful girl...and just mistreat abuse and reject me-- their reactions are backwards and illogical.. i radiate light/love...its just part of my being...that's why animals love me dearly and deeply....people see and know this...they just respond to it backawrds---they respond to my kindness and love with disgust abuse and hatred...it doesnt' make any sense..its sickening and strange...
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replied June 23rd, 2015
You seam like you waste your time with people who don't deserve your time . Smile maybe their reactions to you tells you that they are losers and that they are beneath you. Maybe you should appreciate yourself more, your intelligence, your personality and your appearance. Sick people who treat you nicely and who appreciate ALL those good qualities that you have to offer and REJECT those who reject you. Smile
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replied November 28th, 2016
I never thought I would meet someone like you. I also through the same thing like you.
I think the best way we can possibly do is pray, pray, pray.
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replied May 21st, 2013
well, despite the fact that i have been through a lot of rejection and trauma in other things...I still come across as friendly, nice and moreso than the men im meetin who are usually cold and rude towards me. I don't want to say its body language or other things because men's behavior towards me seems to stem the minute the see or encounter me--before i even speak my first word, or do anything, so after years of analysis yes ive come to the conclusion it mostly has to do with me being attractive. yes there is energy and other things but i dont think thats it as others have told me clearly...'the man that gets you is lucky' and 'any guy that gets with you is lucky' or 'gosh you'll have no problem finding a man' and even an old man once at my job who came as a customer couldnt believe i was single- he was literally shocked...he said...how are you single??? what??? he was just genuinely shocked...he didnt believe me...he said "you can have any boy you want"??? and mostly the men i meet are males off the internet who are using the net as a medium to mistreat or use women. so no i dont think it has to do with me in any way except that men are insecure around me for some reason. also im very bubbly friendly and nice, while the men ar the boring ones who just sit there and some don't even say anything- i do all the talking because they are staring at me in silence and rudely too.

also, where i live is also a factor...as i went to another city fair and men were gawking at me...and i went to NYC at a comedy club and a comedian was telling me and my sister we're pretty and then asked about me-- ie he was interested in me--i live in florida and the men here in orlando seem to be deranged or sick or have serious issues. i think its location and situation but i still find it crazy...all of it....men also hold back with me...most men are SO turned on by me they can barely breathe around me...they are huffing and puffing and hold it back but are quick to just reject me at any notion of sexual anything. even yesterday i had a horrible experience with some jerk off the internet..he did a similar thing...treated me so oddly..and was so rude and weird.. again most men's mistreatment of me begins upon seeing me immediately...totally immediate...they SEE ME...and then there comes the mistreatment.. i am beautiful and sweet...it makes no sense..none of it does...

my beauty is not about my looks solely...its apparent i am a beautiful soul/person...it radiates from me--people know this and see it. my brother's wife...is very pretty/beautiful...and she is just a really good person too...or someone who you can see isnt just about being pretty. for me-- people can see who I am...my outward beauty is a reflection of my inner beauty--people know this..they see it all they just seem to be unable to handle it which makes no sense. it makes no sense as to why men see this beautiful girl...and just mistreat abuse and reject me-- their reactions are backwards and illogical.. i radiate light/love...its just part of my being...that's why animals love me dearly and deeply....people see and know this...they just respond to it backawrds---they respond to my kindness and love with disgust abuse and hatred...it doesnt' make any sense..its sickening and strange...
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replied May 21st, 2013
Extremely eHealthy
I have nothing to add to that above but if you wish to send me a personal message we could correspond a little and something might occur to me.
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