My Mom had Alzheimer's and was walking talking and complaining up until the week of Oct 29th. She just stopped walking, and eating. She was admitted into the hospital with a blood clot in her leg, her kidney's were shutting down and she passed on the 8th of Nov in a nursing home with hospice. *sigh* I don't know where to go from here except I lost my dad in 1982 I was only 21 yrs old. I knew Mom was dying and her Alzheimer's drove me insane most the time...I remember wishing God would just take her and now that he has Im LOST, confused, hurt and ALONE! I have never felt so alone in my whole life. I know my Mom wasn't here with me for the last 10 yrs but I talked to her every day at 7pm on the phone and saw her every week. The holidays are upon me and I feel overwhelmed and all I seem to want to do it cry! I love Christmas always have but this year its so hard to even want to get out of bed. I know that time will heal this pain but Im taking out my frustrations on those that love me the most Sad
I'm also going through a very painful divorce at the moment. He picked drugs over myself and his son. Please tell me life will move on...and this feeling of being alone will get better in time!!
Just had to vent Thanks
Renee
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replied December 7th, 2010
Community Volunteer
Hi Renee and welcome to ehealth: When my Mom passed on, I too, was overwhelmed with two sets of emotions...She was ill and entering into that hazy part of life and I was the only one of her three children that took care of her....It's rough...You are pulled two ways, but you now must accept that you did all that was humanly possible to make her life better...Please, don't feel guilty because of your past feelings...Both she and your Father would never want to see this happen....

Yes, you are right...Time will heal the pain...But, honey give it time...You have a son to live for...You are still young...And you will get better....Breaking up is hard to do, however, sometimes it is for the best....You can be lonely with someone as well as not being with them...

IMO, it's good to vent....I find that letting it all hang out can clear my mind...Saying this, anytime you want to "let it out" we are all ears....I send you my best wishes and hopes for tomorrow....Love...

Caroline
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