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Losing control of anorexia

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I'm 14 and I have been dealing with anorexia since I was 12. Last year I was doing really well and was able to eat to meals a day almost everyday. But since I started school after summer, I have returned to my old habits. I lie all the time about what I eat and when I worked out etc. But now I can't even be around food because it makes me feel really ill. I really want to lose some weight because I look huge compared to all of my friends. I'm size 6/8 but I only want to be size 6.
I'm losing control of this though because I am completely obssessed with not eating and if I ever do I have to work it off immediately. i've also started self harming to help deal with stress and anxiety.
I really want to feel confident in myself but I really don't know how. I don't want to end up in hospital and I don't want to lie but I don't know what else to say.
Is anorexia something I will ever be able to cope with, and if it is, where do I start. I can't carry on like this and I can feel myself getting tired more easily. I'm always cold and I lose my temper more often and I know that I need to deal with this but I really don't know how.
I've also had to lie to my long term boyfriend(over a year now) about what is going on.

Should I tell him, and how can I deal with all of this.

thank you,
take care

Natalie .x.
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replied May 10th, 2009
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I was really bad with ana at your age, Also Got into a relationship and ended up bursting out crying and telling him everything and in the long run he was the reason i got over my problem. He gave me such a confidence boost, Made me feel loved even tho he will be on your case sonetimes i think it is a good idea to tell him. You need someone to talk to.
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replied February 19th, 2012
if your boyfriend is the same age as you, he might not be ready to help you with your health. But seeing as it's a long term relationship, he will definitely be able to help you with your emotions.But if you want to fully recover, you need to seek treatment. It's very hard at first but it's even harder if you try to do it by yourself. I wish you lots of luck and hold onto your boyfriend, he's a keeper Wink I can relate as I just found out mine is depressed, which was a major shock.I don't tell him anything about my problems but I like listening to him and I bet your boyfriend will be happy to listen to you Smile
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