Medical Questions > Mental Health > Anxiety and Stress Forum

Lack of motivation or just lazy?

I don't know if this is the right kind of place for a post like this, but I am looking for a few answers or maybe some direction?

All of my life I have been a very unmotivated girl, looking back on it now - from an early age I was never really made to finish anything, I remember dropping out of ballet at age 5 or 6, dropping out of basketball at age 10, I never had to finish my dinner (I was too fussy) and then I dropped out of high school after tenth grade.

I've had many jobs, all of which I get bored with after about a year. I was frustrated at my unhappiness in these jobs thinking I'd rather work for myself, so I moved on to 'starting' my own web design / freelance business which fazed out after a while, I wasn't bringing in enough money due to my lack of motivation to do the work with no supervision at home.

I don't know if the job part is connected, maybe I just haven't found what I love yet, but it's mostly my home life which bothers me..

I'm just so unmotivated and lazy. Our (husband and i) house is ALWAYS messy with clutter, junk, rubbish etc. I, to put it simply, cannot ever be bothered to put things away, throw things in the bin etc etc.

There are so many things I want to do in my life such as gardening, home renovations, scrapbooking, photography etc etc, I am a very creative person, BUT I usually just lie around and watch TV or lose countless hours surfing the internet.

I have a tendency for depression, I was very depressed for about 6 years of my teenage life which ended when I met my now husband. I don't know if this is related?

Am I just lazy? How do I make myself get up and go?

I am so jealous of people who do things here and now, my parents are SO motivated, if mum tells dad the fence is broken, he'll jump up and fix it right away.

In comparison, my husband and I took two years to flatten a mound of dirt in the back yard so we could pave an outdoor eating area. (and after all the hard work assisted with by my father - we've used it about 5 times and it's completely overgrown with weeds now, after 2 years!)
& his car has been in our shed for about 6 years pending a sanding/painting job we were going to do to it. (this has meant we have only had one usable car for this past 6 yrs too which you think would maybe motivate us to finish it? no, we are now thinking of just selling it).

I could give you so many examples such as these..

Any advice for a complicated girl like me?? Smile
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replied May 26th, 2008
Extremely eHealthy
Needing a kick
I feel as I am looking in a mirror after reading your post miss_k. Here and there wondering are we really just lazy or is there some sugnificance behind it. At a young age looking back now, you can almost wonder if we (whomever) might have had ADD and just followed us through life. Or could it be depression which could easily bring on the same, just with a constant remorse feeling. Being as close to this picture as I am with you, I can say for sure, to this day I do not finish a job completely before loosing interest or starting something else. Is there a remedy? I think there is. And you have the answer. You and hubby need to actually make yourselves get out there and do things. Things that need doing and things for fun times. I think in time, you both might learn there is a world out there waiting for you to come out and join in it. Try doing some of the thing or hobbies you use to like doing. At least it is a start. Could very well be your tendencies have kinda rubbed off on hubby.
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replied May 27th, 2008
CarolDiane how do you deal with it?

Maybe looking for an answer isn't the answer? if someone was to say hey you do this because of this or this, it wouldn't really make a difference.. i guess the fact is it's harder for me than others to be motivated which means i just have to work harder. and maybe just acknowledging that fact is the first point and i just have to keep remembering it, and make things a habit. turn off the tv and the computer and force myself to do things, usually if i do start to do something i think 'hey, it's not so hard!' but it doesn't get to that point 9 times out of 10. I guess i'll just keep trying!
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replied May 27th, 2008
Extremely eHealthy
miss_k wrote:
CarolDiane how do you deal with it?

Maybe looking for an answer isn't the answer? if someone was to say hey you do this because of this or this, it wouldn't really make a difference.. i guess the fact is it's harder for me than others to be motivated which means i just have to work harder. and maybe just acknowledging that fact is the first point and i just have to keep remembering it, and make things a habit. turn off the tv and the computer and force myself to do things, usually if i do start to do something i think 'hey, it's not so hard!' but it doesn't get to that point 9 times out of 10. I guess i'll just keep trying!


Now that's the way. Now go get em girlfriend. The open doors are waiting for you to go through them. One step at a time. yes
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replied May 30th, 2008
hey miss_k its not surprised to know all about you because its a phase of everyone's life and in every 10 perosn 2 are like that.
I just want to suggest you something like
Start talking to people live near by you.
Take their help so you will enjoy doing work together specially if other person is hard working.
Start looking for your hobbies.
Weekends do work with your husband...like changing your house interior will make you feel inetersting.
don start with works which are time taken but small small works so that you will become use to and then you can increase your work spped and time duration.


If you are not comfortable with these i will try out some new things for you... weekends m not there so c u on monday
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replied June 3rd, 2008
Lazy or Unmotivated Not!
No m'am, you are not lazy. May I suggest an evaluation for ADD. Your story is mine until I was evaluated for ADD and yipper there it was.

Females more than males have the "fog" ADD, not the swinging off the ceiling kind. It is a wonder that I did not consider suicide my life was in such a mess topped off with self-loathing.

This is what I did:
-thyroid eval: hypo now treated with cheap levoxyl (generic)

-ADD: treated with Adderall 10 mgs, 2 times a day. I cannot use the Adderall generic or the time-release capsules. Also, I titrated from 5 mgs to 10 over a 30-day period.

-carbs: simply cannot use white carbs: cookies, etc. can use candy. the white carbs made me even more zombie-like. Pasta/bread knocked me out.

If you have every walked past something that needed picking up while thinking "that needs to be picked up" but not doing it ... there is a real possibility you are ADD. There is actually a process delay in our brains.

In closing, please do not allow anyone to tell you generic is the same as brand. It is not in effect. You may be one of the women who can use the generic, all biochemistry is different. But if you can't, you can become very discouraged on the generic.

Don't give up if the first med doesn't work. Keep going, I just happened to hit the right med the first time.

We are not lazy, no one would choose to live as I did: failure after failure, starting then abandoning projects, chaotic house, and on and on.

Please let us hear from you after you take control of your precious life!
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replied February 16th, 2010
Thyroid symptoms
Hi, I also feel as if I am looking at a mirror. I just turned 23 and was diagnosed with Hypothyroidism but wonder if I could possibly have Thyroid cancer. I was diagnosed with ADD, Aspergers,and Major Depression since I was a child. Currently I have bad anxiety, poor motivation and commitment issues, and brain fog. I'm tired of having not got anywhere in life and want to be successful, but I have tried so many times so many ways to become a somebody and to get somewhere. I believe my thyroid problem has caused me to have sexual dysfunction also. I have also had unexplained blackouts/dizzy spells. I've had MRIs and all sorts of tests done that came back normal. But all tests came back with a negative 9 point something. I am currently on Levothyroxin 50mg. Does anybody have any answers?
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