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In a relationship with an alcohol abuser

Hi, my boyfriend of three years has drinking problems that have gotten worse over the last year. It seems he always turns to alcohol when times are tough. His mother had given him and his twin sister up when they were young, for drug abuse, and he spent majority of his teens in a foster home. When he finally met his mother however she died 5 years later, followed shortly by the death of his 2 year old nephew. I know his life has been difficult and I don't know how to be there to comfort him yet un-incourage the alcohol.

Ever since he was young he was raised in a drinking family and has choosen to surround himself with friends that live the same lifestyle. He has lost a job or two due to alcohol, as well as friends. Alot of money goes into this drinking habbit and our local bar. He makes promises he rarely keeps, tells me he will doesnt happen. I have seen him try though, and he is capable of cutting back and only having a few every night...but this doesnt last long.

There has been alot of trust broken between us. Im not sure he is willing to change. I have brought this up to him before, but he brushes it off with a little agner and tells me its normal. I dont know how to talk to him or approach him with my feelings so he will actually listen? i dont want to give up on him, because i love the real him. i just have no idea if theres anything i can do to help or where to even start. i hope im fighting a winning battle, but some days i doubt that i am. i would just really appreciate advice or insight...
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replied January 27th, 2011
His problems are not your problems.This is a co-dependent relationship and unhealthy.Take a break from him and see how you feel.
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