Medical Questions > Mental Health > Depression Forum

I've Been Feeling Worthless

User Profile
I don't know if I'm just being stupid or what. I just feel like there's nothing good about me, that I'm not good at anything. I just keep putting myself down. Lately, when I'm by myself, I tend to just tell myself that I'm a waste of human life. I'll tell myself that I'm stupid, fat, ugly, just about every bad thing that I can think of. I'll tell myself that my friends just feel sorry for me and aren't really my friends. A few times now, I've imagined that everyone would have been better off if I had never been born. It's gotten to the point that even if someone compliments me, my brain will twist it around into how worthless I am. Another thing, when I get into these moods, it's normally just tiny things that set it off. Like the one I'm in right now. It was set off by me not being able to get my learn's permit tomorrow because the DMV is having trouble with their computers. For some reason I felt like it was my fault. I don't know why I think this way, there's nothing wrong with my life. I have a wonderful family, awesome friends, and just a relatively good life. So, I just wonder why, if everything in my life is great, I think and feel the way I do? I guess I'm just being dumb and overly sensitive. I just want to know what someone else thinks. I don't want to bring this up to any of my friends or family 'cause I don't want anyone to worry. (Though I doubt anyone would worry anyways) I just don't want to give my parents anything else to worry about. So, if you want to, I would like to hear what you guys think.

~Leo~
Did you find this post helpful?
First Helper dozers
|

User Profile
replied August 30th, 2010
Just pray, & ask god to give you strength.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 30th, 2010
I Feel Worthless Like I Dont Matter Like Nothing That I Do Matters! I Hate It! I Dont Want To Even Be Here Anymore Cause Im So Sick Of It! Maybe If I Run Away Forever It Will Help! IDK ! Maybe Im Just Not Ment To Be Worth Anything! Forget It I Dont Know I Just Want Yall To Tell Me Is It Really Worth Liveing To Be Worth Nothing Or Shopuld I Just Move Away And Never Speak Again...????
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 30th, 2010
It sounds that you have depression which is something I've dealt with through out my life even at your age. I'm assuming your a teenager by you discussing your learner's permit. It is a real thing and you need to get help. Many times it runs in the family and you may not even know it but there could be others in your family that are dealing with depression too. If you have a supportive family you need to let them know so they can get you help. And don't start feeling prideful, like "I should just handle this on my own" because it's a real disease that when dealt with can be helped. I unfortunately didn't have the support from home growing up especially because I grew up in foster care, but if you have supportive family you need to let them know. They love you and they will understand. Do it for yourself so you can have the life you deserve. You are on this earth for a reason. You were not born just because. Please get the help you deserve.
From a concerned reader.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 31st, 2010
Bipolar/chronic depressive here
I can get some wicked things in my head. for almost two years I struggled with this notion that everyone around me only kept me around as something to use. They wasted my time and left me outside their own events. it got better though after I met a girl in my junior year. then she cheated on me and left. everything just got worse. dispite that girls abuse I owe her my life in more than one way. she saved me once by giving me the times i longed for. the second time was when she left. it took longer for me to realise it but in the end she only taught me that things happen and they are what they are. not everything concerns me or is a direct result of my lack of anything. I hope i made a proper point to help you jump past a hard phase I experianced. some times you just need change, dont put too much emphasis on any one thing, because laws of life just dictate that things dont always work out how we planned, just let it by and replan or substitute. dont wait around for your friends be your own governor of life.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 31st, 2010
Experienced User
ShadowLeo wrote:
I don't know if I'm just being stupid or what. I just feel like there's nothing good about me, that I'm not good at anything. I just keep putting myself down. Lately, when I'm by myself, I tend to just tell myself that I'm a waste of human life. I'll tell myself that I'm stupid, fat, ugly, just about every bad thing that I can think of. I'll tell myself that my friends just feel sorry for me and aren't really my friends. A few times now, I've imagined that everyone would have been better off if I had never been born. It's gotten to the point that even if someone compliments me, my brain will twist it around into how worthless I am. Another thing, when I get into these moods, it's normally just tiny things that set it off. Like the one I'm in right now. It was set off by me not being able to get my learn's permit tomorrow because the DMV is having trouble with their computers. For some reason I felt like it was my fault. I don't know why I think this way, there's nothing wrong with my life. I have a wonderful family, awesome friends, and just a relatively good life. So, I just wonder why, if everything in my life is great, I think and feel the way I do? I guess I'm just being dumb and overly sensitive. I just want to know what someone else thinks. I don't want to bring this up to any of my friends or family 'cause I don't want anyone to worry. (Though I doubt anyone would worry anyways) I just don't want to give my parents anything else to worry about. So, if you want to, I would like to hear what you guys think.

~Leo~


Mate, you are not being stupid, what you are expressing is that you have a broken heart. When we feel this way, such as condemning ourself and pulling ourself apart, we are only expressing the hurt and offence that is buried deep down within our heart.

Mate, you are not a waste of human life, because you need to know that you were born for a reason. Did you know that beauty is skin deep, and I can tell just by reading what you are saying that you are a good person, and has a compassionate heart.

Friends are hard to please, but it’s not friends that make us feel this way, it is how we view ourself, and it comes from our childhood.

When we feel rejected and abandoned we get onto our own case and become our own judge and condemner.

We can say that we have a wonderful family, awesome friends, and have a good life; and I can say if that is so, then why are you like this?

I believe that it’s time that you do some real deep searching of your heart, and begin to think with your heart, because our mind is a battleground.

If you are suffering my dear friend then it’s time that you spoke out and talked with someone and dump. You know having a big should to dump on is one of the greatest things to release your hurts, offences, etc., etc, that may be buried deep down within your heart.

Mate, all these thoughts come from you mind and not your heart.

You know mate, once upon a time I felt the same as you did, and here I am fifty years later, still facing life, and running a race that can only lead me to where I am about to go, the reason why I was born.

There is much to life, and there are many sufferings. I have had a full life and many, many sufferings, but I came through it all, because I emptied my HEART!

Blessings to you my dear friend and I pray that you will find your HEART!
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied September 1st, 2010
Re: I've Been Feeling Worthless
ShadowLeo wrote:
I don't know if I'm just being stupid or what. I just feel like there's nothing good about me, that I'm not good at anything. I just keep putting myself down. Lately, when I'm by myself, I tend to just tell myself that I'm a waste of human life. I'll tell myself that I'm stupid, fat, ugly, just about every bad thing that I can think of. I'll tell myself that my friends just feel sorry for me and aren't really my friends. A few times now, I've imagined that everyone would have been better off if I had never been born. It's gotten to the point that even if someone compliments me, my brain will twist it around into how worthless I am. Another thing, when I get into these moods, it's normally just tiny things that set it off. Like the one I'm in right now. It was set off by me not being able to get my learn's permit tomorrow because the DMV is having trouble with their computers. For some reason I felt like it was my fault. I don't know why I think this way, there's nothing wrong with my life. I have a wonderful family, awesome friends, and just a relatively good life. So, I just wonder why, if everything in my life is great, I think and feel the way I do? I guess I'm just being dumb and overly sensitive. I just want to know what someone else thinks. I don't want to bring this up to any of my friends or family 'cause I don't want anyone to worry. (Though I doubt anyone would worry anyways) I just don't want to give my parents anything else to worry about. So, if you want to, I would like to hear what you guys think.

~Leo~


Hi Leo,

You aren't being stupid, you are just being human. Many of us go through the kind of thinking you are doing. I would like to tell you about the special things I see in you, like you are a talented writer and a sensitive person, but I know that doesn't help unless you believe it yourself. I have had negative thoughts too and it took many years of putting myself down and feeling unworthy before I did the work to get myself into a more positive place. I wish I could tell you how to step out of yourself so that you could realize that negative self talk is just thoughts....thoughts are running through your head constantly, but they are not you. If you can, try to replace those thoughts by saying opposite things to yourself. For example if your thought is "I am worthless" replace it with "I am worthy." If you are alone, say it out loud. Look at yourself in the mirror and say it to yourself. If you do this often enough, your brain will respond to it and you will start to feel differently about yourself. Just try it, it can't hurt!

I hope you find it helpful to write about how you feel, because it often helps just to know that there are others who feel or have felt the same way you do. Reaching out is a courageous thing to do! My wish for you is that you begin to see what others see in you ~ that you are an intelligent, sensitive soul and that you are very deserving of all the good things life has to offer.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied September 1st, 2010
Experienced User
Leo, once upon a time I carried a lot of rubbish in my life, then one day I sat in front of the computer and wrote and wrote why I felt this way.

As I wrote anger began to well up in my heart and a bit of bitterness, and I kept writing. I read it and corrected and read it again, then after reading, I ripped it up and threw it into the bin.

The next time I felt down, I wrote again, and I from then I kept on writing until I got all the rubbish out of my system.

Mate, a lot of our problems are emotional, physical, and spiritual.

So, if you want to talk about them, then start writing, and share with us if you wish.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied February 3rd, 2012
I feel very much the same way. I feel like I have done nothing meaningful with my life, except for my 2 sons, which I actually feel like because of me, they are not the people they could be. I feel that it is due to the personality I was born with. I am too shy and sensitive.I am uncomfortable speaking to people especially if I don't know them. It has prevented me from putting myself out there and gaining experience and knowledge that I would need to be a more successful person. I dwell on my poor decisions and clog my brain with negative thoughts and what could have or should have been. I waste a lot of valuable time and energy on self defeating thoughts. I don't know how to stop it and it affects everything including my memory and my ability to understand things. I feel like I am incapable of improving myself and I hate it. At 49 years old, I feel like it is too late to bother fixing it now because most of my life is behind me, at least the most important years. I feel like I should now be building on everything I should have learned and experienced up till now, but I find I don't even remember a good deal of it. I feel like I still haven't found a purpose for my existence and that I probably never will. Maybe it was some small insignificant thing and I should just accept that I am just not ever going to be anyone with any great accomplishments. So to all you who feel worthless, I totally understand what you are going through and I hope if you are young that you can find a way out now and enjoy your life more than I did. It is a very frustrating and lonely state of mind because you think everyone around you is more normal than you are.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied February 3rd, 2012
Experienced User
Hi Debbie,

Just by your “username” tells us how you feel.

Your explanation is exactly the same as of the world’s population, and it’s never-ending. We can throw our hands up in the air, screaming out to the heavens: “Why me?”

But sadly, the answers to our problems can only come from us, and at the same time we do need some good sound advice and guidance from a compassionate person.

I have a few quirky sayings:

Meet the Lord every morning, with just a “Good Morning”, and ask Him to guide and lead you across the path of another person who needs a friend.

Have a passion for God and compassion for people.

Choose the way of most persistence rather than the path of least resistance.

What happens in you is more important than what happens to you.

If what you are doing won’t make a difference in five years, it probably doesn’t matter now.

How old are your sons?

And it’s sad when we try our best as a parent, but we seem to have failed badly in our own mind, but we need to look back on our own life, and we will see that our life was probably much the same when we were young and that is why it’s like so today.

I know that feeling because of my own parenthood, I’m 75 now, and we tried our hardest over the years to make it up to our children for their childhood that wasn’t good parenting..

Don’t beat yourself up, and blame yourself. You see Debbie; you can only fix the problem and not the blame. And as sad as it is your misfortune may be a lot, but there is someone else who may have it worse than you. All those people out there who are displaying what appears to be normal life, is really false layer of success and happiness. Even the rich suffer the same.

Have you every thought of approaching your local church and seek help, friendship, and advice?

I knew a lot of shy and sensitive people, and when they joined a good church and did a few “life-type” courses, and talked to people expressing their feelings, it’s amazing how a person’s life soon changed. But sadly, we need to also be aware that some churches are full of people exactly the same as you, and they will be of no help to you. Search Debbie and ask God to place someone across your path and to lead you to a church.

Experience will only come from seeking help from a compassionate person.

When we dwell on things, only negative thoughts can come to mind. What you need is a renewing of your mind, and when that’s renewed you will then begin to feel a healing of your broken-heart.

You can stop, by stepping out and head for that church that is going to help you.

49 isn’t too late to fix things, at my age I am still fixing things, and my heart goes out to people who need to get things right with the world. You can fix things, but firstly you need to make the right decisions and choices.

When we are alone and lonely, our mind will control our loneliness.

You need a mentor Debbie. I try so hard myself to encourage others to develop their character by displaying my own character of being an encourager. We all need a loving heart and not a hurting heart. There are many ways to overcome our broken-heart and make amends with our past that at times drags us down of things that we did and to other people. Forgiveness is the healing medicine of most of our problems.

See we all have a life story, so think about it, and write it out and from doing this you may solve the many problems that you assume you have.

Here you are at a difficult position of your life, making a difficult decision, therefore, as I said before to you to seek good advice from other people, and they you can help you to make the right decision.
Razz
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied February 3rd, 2012
WIFI1 -
Thanks so much for taking time to respond to my thoughts. How very nice of you. First of all, Debbie, is not my name, I just thought it sounded 'funny' because I often make jokes to compensate for my percieved low intelligence. Anyway, I agree that a compassionate person would be wonderful to have around, that used to be my Mom who would be just about your age if she were still here. She was taken from me WAY too soon, 12 years ago this year. She was 65, had lung cancer from smoking. I still need her so much and losing her has affected my life like I can't even describe. Perhaps I was relying too much on her for my strength and not myself. I haven't been able to find that same compassion in ANYone, not even my boyfriend of 7 years, although he is a tremendously compassionate person. I can't explain it, he is so self actualized that I don't think he can understand the feelings, although I know he understands the condition.
I also agree with you about church and God. I pray often, probably not as often as I should, (beating myself up again, I AM good at that). I have gone to a church on and off for several years, currently I am off. I thought I would find my peace there, but find I am even sadder because no one will go with me. My boys are 21 and 14 and they went when they were younger, when I could force them, but because of my inconsistancies, they are definately not interested now. My boyfriend won't go either because he already knows the bible very well and feels he has a really good relationship with God without having to go to a church. Besides that an 80 year old man started hitting on me every week and made me so uncomfortable! I do think I need to find a niche for myself that helps other people some way so that I could feel useful.
One of your quirky sayings is one that is one of my biggest problems. I always choose the path of least resistance. I am downright frightened of confrontations. I get nervous easily and can't think clearly when I am stressed or under pressure.
Aside from sexual abuse from my father and then having my son have to experience the same fate and losing my Mom, having to divorce a man who was ultra controlling and ultimately contributed to my weak personality, my life really hasn't been that awful. I know there are people with worse problems. Way worse. I usually find myself feeling worse about myself, rather than being inspired by it. I am a whiner, I'll admit it and I don't like that about me. I don't like it in others and I also find myself being critical of others. A terrible trait my father had that I hated about him.The thoughts come into my head and I don't know how to chase them away. I know I should think only kind and positive things, that is what Jesus would do.
Thank you for being an encourager. Sorry for the long post, but I do find that writing is great therapy. I am a talker and even writing, I sometimes have trouble shutting up! I will keep searching, I know happiness is supposed to come from within, but mine is buried deep sometimes. Don't get me wrong, I can have a good time and can be happy, but I always have the black cloud following me. Hopefully someday it will dissipate. Thanks for your advice it was very helpful! You are a wonderful person for taking a interest in someone you never even met. God Bless You! You have warmed my heart tonight........ (smile)
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied February 4th, 2012
Experienced User
Hi Debbie, but actually Wi FI 1 isn’t my name either, but has a specific meaning of many terrible things that are happening within our world and there is nothing we can do about it. A long story, but very knowledgeable and much wisdom.

We all find at some time in our life that life is a pain in the butt, and the sad thing about it, is that, we can’t do much about it, but to change our own ways, attitudes, shortcomings, and most of our our pride.

We all need an understanding and compassionate person in our life, but it’s hard to find, because most are having their problems, situations, and circumstances that they are keeping close to their heart.

Many times we are hurt and offended by those who are close to us.

Yes, when we cling to mum, and I have to say that, we then struggle to find a replacement for all that love and compassion we had with each other. My parents died over thirty years ago, and I wish they were alive so I could tell them that I loved them and forgave them for the life I spent with them. It was a hard life, and I basically ran away from home and joined the Army.

But before doing so, I came to God, our Lord Jesus Christ, and for that few years that I attended church before going into the Army, I felt for the first time love and compassion. For the next 32 years I wandered in the wilderness, but knew that God was with me, because he saved my life many times.

I can see that when you lost your mum, in a real sense you were angry with your mum for smoking and dying from lung cancer. We can’t see these hidden feelings as they manifest in other things. And you loss from your mum is a form of “unforgiveness”. You say that you have been to church, then if that is so, then you need to forgive your mum for leaving you stranded. It may all seem “out of sync” thinking this way, but I know from my past experiences that forgiveness and love is the only things to heal a broken-heart.

As sad as it is, our false world is an incompassionate world, that is false, and sadly many churches are false as well. They make many promises and don’t keep them. I have a saying that if you TALK, then WALK THE TALK, and many churches don’t WALK THE TALK!

What you call self-actualized, is basically self-centredness, as your partner possibly has his own problems, from his past and childhood memories.

Many of use understand deep down that there is some connection with God and the church, but sadly there is so much false teaching that many get the wrong idea about who God really is.

Going to church will not get you right with God, there are many things that we need to do in our life, to bring us to that place with God. We don’t put him up on a pedestal or a shelf and take him down when things are not going the way things should be. If you have read the Bible then you will find that Paul didn’t have things easy. He suffered just as much as you are suffering, because of his beliefs. In his day he was killing Christians, until God slam-dunked him.

Not going to church is the problem, knowing God is the problem, and the Bible and what it really says. Peace can only come confession, and repentance.

You see Debbie, the real believing of our Heavenly Father, is the starting place for peace. There are many things in our life that we need to ask ourselves, which I do frequently with myself and I ask myself these questions:

Am I a good person?

Am I a kind person?

Am I a gentle person?

Am I a patient person?

Am I a self-controlled person?

Am I a faithful person?

Good questions, and if all those answers are “YES”, then there is no reason why we haven’t love, joy, and peace.

There is an old saying that you can’t drag a horse to water and make it drink. So, your boys are resenting being forced. I always found that the impossibles in life become possible through faith and God’s mercy.

As I said that if you TALK, then you must WALK. On this note what church do you go to, off and on?

I am sorry Debbie, but having a knowledge of the bible doesn’t really provide a good relationship with God. It’s our faith in him that forms that relationship.

Well, that 80 year-old man will meet his maker and I can assure you that the outcome of his contact will not be in his favour.

One of the best places to start helping other is to become involved with OP Shops, or soup kitchens, if you have them in your area. I live in Australia, and there are many niches like these around for those alone and lonely people to find a place in their life.

The sexual abuse by your father is really one of the main reasons why you feel the way you do, then your past marriage, and going through a divorce.

Debbie there are many answers to your problems, and there are so many, which can only be sorted out one by one.

I suggest you go to GOOGLE engine and search for Christian sites on FORGIVENESS.

The three-golden-words that I used in life to bring me to realisation and spiritually aware of things around me is to practice these words:

If you please, I thank you, You are right, I am wrong, Please forgive me, I forgive you, and I love you.

These are the hardest words in anybody’s life.

Our heart is so wrapped up in all our hurts, offences, and bitterness that can only lead to hatred, and by God’s mercy we can be released from all of this through good counselling, Biblically.

Our heart is like an onion, and as we peel each layer off, we begin to see more layers, and as we work through all of them, we will begin to find that release and freedom from a dark shadow that has been following us around all our life, just disappear, and never return.

I’ve said enough, and will leave you with much to think about, and don’t hesitate to contact via this way or by internal message.

Blessings.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied May 7th, 2012
Feeling Down
I am 52 have 2 adult daughters 1 married the other to be married extremely soon, as her father, my ex husband of 20 years has been giving 6 months of life. We are still good friends and have always maintained a strong connection for the children sake he has now moved in with one of my daughters. My other daughter and myself see him daily the girls care for their father and I help care for them helping with meals etc. This has all happened around Easter time. Last year I changed jobs after working for a firm for 7 years I wasn't happy with my new job stayed 1 year have changed again now changing again due to not enough hours. I started feeling extremely down whilst I was still working at the job I was at for 7 years, thinking the change would make me feel better but it has made things worse and worse feeling down, wanting to be alone, feeling helpless, losing my confidence, over eating this is adding more pressure as I am putting weight on, I live on my own I have a partner of 7 years which he gives me no support what he does offer is support in his way which is making things worse as he keeps on asking have you applied for jobs have you gone for interviews did you get the job. I feel the support he is offering is making me feel even more down like I am not trying hard enough. Today I went for my 12th interview which I got the job it is 3 days a week 22.5 hours which I feel I can survive but the statement my partner made well that not enought to live on, I am feeling so so down I want to cry but I am so blocked inside I feel I can only cope working this amount of hours I dont want to work fulltime
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 14th, 2012
not sure how to feel
have felt the same way but people just don't understand because you can hold a smile its like on the outside you look happy but the inside is just feeling the opposite i remember i went to a school counselor and he didn't really even give it a second thought that i wasn't happy and didnt help me at all its so hard because you want the attention but then again you don't but i can definately relate to what has been written above and it's strange to see others feel the same just feeling like a waste of space
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied November 5th, 2012
I feel the same i suppose,i feel like i dont move anywhere in my life that i cannot feel happy by doing same things other people do.I am in collage now and my brother says that its the best place in anyones life but i dont feel the same for 3 years, ive been feeling that life goes on and i am just passing by,i dont think i have any skills or talents things happen and i just watch.I dont feel like "me" with my friends.Most of the time i drink or smoke some herb to get away but it doesn't work...it's just hard toendure when things happen around you and you are nothing but a bystander
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 28th, 2013
I have felt like im worthless i felt im being used by my freinds i dont understand im being good to them but it seems they forgot my effort to help them...They went to a church and they didnt even invited me i appreciate they can just say that they went to a church along with a friend but there is not enough space in the car so next you should come at least they would say that...i felt insulted...PLEASE HELP IM CONFUSE
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 28th, 2013
Iv'e been good to them i always think of myself that even my value has been ignored i offer my help open heartedly i always think that goodness will defend me...
|
Did you find this post helpful?
Must Read
Do you know how doctors define clinical depression? Learn more about this brain disorder and types of depression that doctors diagnose here....
Can depression run in families? Can hormones really make you depressed? Yes! Learn more about causes and conditions of clinical depression here....
People with depressive illnesses do not all experience the same symptoms. Do you know the signs and symptoms of depression? Read on to learn more....