Medical Questions > Mental Health > Bipolar Relationships Forum

I try to be understanding but I'm only human

The love of my life is bipolar... We have been together for almost 6 years and been through a lot together. We are also recovering addicts, well, at least I am, as far as I know. There's so much that's going on, but right now I'm dealing with him being super insecure. It doesn't matter how much I tell and show him what he means to me, there's always this bug that messes with his head. Then the accusations start, and a fight begins. I try to be understanding but I'm only human and loose patients. And when he starts crying and getting loud, I get scared and don't know what to do. But where do these illusions come from? How do I deal with it? Is this an episode? I've been doing research, but there's so much to know, and everyone is different. I wish I can ask about every one of my experiences I've had, but its just too much... Does anyone have an answer to my current situation? It will be appreciated... And just to add one more thing, he is medicated and the psychiatrist just upped his lithium. Would the adjustment of medication have something to do with it?
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replied May 3rd, 2014
Thank you for asking!
What your boyfriend is having is a classic presentation of bipolar disorders and these mood swings need a proper psychiatric facility and an expertise of a psychiatrist. A very strict compliance to the medicines is advised. Get him to a psychiatrist and let them help you. What you are doing is a good human being sign and yes patience has a threshold and once crossed becomes intolerable even the if the stimulus is love of one's life.
It is the exam of your love and a troubled situation of your boyfriend. You can help him or leave him. Find hima good Bipolar facility. Sign him in and then it is your choice.You can move on or stick to the man you loved for 6 years.But don't expect from these mood swings some thing a normal human being would respond.
And it take a lot of time to get lithium levels in homeostasis.Put him on inhaled loxapine, some atypical antipsychotics and anxiolytics and benzodiazepines will help.
Discuss the options with your psychiatrist.
Take care
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replied May 3rd, 2014
Community Volunteer
Hi brkylngirl: This is wonderful advice from the doctor...What you are seeing is what you will probably see the rest of your life...Bipolar is a disease where there is no cure...There is medication to curb it, but it can be like a roller coaster...I wish I could tell you something else, but I can't...May I also add that this can be hereditary...Take care...

Caroline...
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replied June 10th, 2014
Experienced User
You said it perfectly Caroline EF. Thanks for saying it.
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replied May 6th, 2014
Thank you so much for your advise.... From Dr. and Caroline. He is under psychiatric care and was hospitalized on a hold. I asked my boyfriend to turn himself in, or I would have to leave him. There is only so much I can take. Besides the mental illness, at the time he was self medicating with meth. So he decided to get help. And after the clinic released him, they offered programs, therapy, and medications. I must add that I believe he also has PTSD. He was in prison for 8 years, in and out for the rest of of the time until 1 year after he met me. Now he is working as as a plumber and really trying to change his life and his habits. I can say he is truly trying. Since he is working, he can only see the psychiatrist once a month. And I do call them and let em know what's going on, I just don't want to tell them how to do their job. I'm just confused about the meds. How long till they find the right cocktail? And even if they do, is he still going to have bad episodes? How long do they last? And one question that's most important to me, HOW DO I KNOW THE DIFFERENCE IF HE IS HAVING AN EPISODE OR DID HE RELAPSE ON METH? Cuz its happened before... When I stopped using after 15 years, I did it cold turkey. Been clean for 3 1/2 years. But I do know and understand that the majority of recovering addicts can't do that. So, how can I know the difference?
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replied May 7th, 2014
Hello all,
Never posted on one of these sights but I gotta talk to those who experience what I am going through cause I'm feeling
pret-Ty damned lonely. The mood swings of my fiance have gotten to a point where I am living in fear of confrontation. Many dynamics exist in our home which I believe are contributing factors to her "irritation" but the only one that I can see (the longer I am here) is me. I don't know where to start or what to do to help. Even though I have been reading and talking with a lot of folks about this disorder. My mate cannot see the way that she "rages" about the smallest thing's. I do. She barely remembers when she punched me in my face. I do. As a matter of fact, anything that I say is disregarded because "she cannot remember it". Is it possible for a person to get comfortable in the unpredictable and dark waters of this disease or to use it as a reason to justify why they do what they do. Like consciously unconscious or the reverse. I used to be a very positive person and am still trying my best to be this way but knowing what I have seen and felt in the past few years has made me feel more pessimistic than ever. I know this sounds selfish and has a lot of i's and me's in it but I have no other formal way of voicing this outside of just fussing all of the time or just always being quiet. Idk anymore
I just know that in my 37 years on this planet, 7 in the military and 18 in the streets, (even if I've never had to confront this form of battle) I know that I cannot ALWAYS be wrong. My vision is not so askew as I am told. And I am NOT crazy. I feel I'm losing it though folks. How to stay dedicated when your constantly told to just leave. How to keep helping when you know your kids need it but you don't want to stay for the mental beatings. Called everything from a moocher to a sorry excuse for a man..... Slowly...... I've begun to believe her.
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