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i never got over the loss of my daughter. what do i do?

i lost my daughter over 20 years ago i never got over it i think i been stuck in grief but i dont no wat to do therupy dont help me
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replied July 22nd, 2012
Experienced User
Hi Denise,

Sorry to hear of your loss. I will offer you the following words to try and help:

First a reality check:

1. You will never "get over it" but you will find ways to go on with your life.

2. There is NO TIMEFRAME on grief. Everyone is different.

3. No 2 people grieve alike, it is as intimately personal as anything can be.

Now those things being said, I have a support group to recommend to you. This is not to "heal" you as the hole in your heart will always be there. This is not a 12 step type program or any other type of "program" and it is not a religious group.

It is a support group for parents who have lost a child. Just those who have been there and those who are there now supporting and helping each other go on with their lives in spite of the hole left by the loss.

The group is called "The compassionate friends". You can google it to find a chapter near you.

There are no dues or fees to pay.

This group has helped my wife and I after the car accident that killed our 27 yr old son last year. These are people who understand the feelings and the depth and expanse of those feelings and how debilitating they can be.

As for me, I just keep putting one foot in front of the other like I'm on autopilot because there is nothing else I can do. I still cry a lot. Everything will be going fine and I see or hear something and WHAM! It hits me like a ton of bricks and all I can do is stop and cry.

I hope you find a group near you and find them helpful.
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