Everyday I feel like I am pushing through jello. I have no energy to keep on living. The thing is, I have plenty of friends, a loving family, but every once in a while there have been those comments from people, and it has just built up throughout my life. It seems as though I have to be completely fake all of the time. When I'm at school, I act all giggley and happy and it takes so much energy that when I get home, I go to my room and don't talk to anyone because I am too tired to put up the act of being happy. I used to cut, but I've tried my very hardest not too because last time it took 3 months for the scars to go away. Nobody knows about it at all because I hide it, I would never want anybody knowing or they would think I was crazy or something. I constantly have suicidal thoughts and just think about how much easier it would be to just leave. I don't have the energy to pretend anymore and I just want to die, I can't take it anymore! Life has no purpose, and even though I love my family, they would be better off without me! My mom has insisted I go and see a theripist because she thinks I have anxiety and depression, which is strange because I know that she doesn't believe in mental disorders! I am so confused with life and just tired of all of the problems and the energy I spend on pretending. I know I have rambled on, and I haven't said a lot but I just don't know how to keep on living. I'm a teen and have been feeling this way for almost a year now... I just think I would be better commuting suicide, and my family would be better without the burden of me.
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replied March 25th, 2015
Experienced User
I am sorry that you are suffering from this problem in your age. You should talk to your parents or any family member that can understand you. You can also visit any medical counselor and take advice. Don't lose hope.
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replied March 29th, 2015
Active User, very eHealthy
[From Abraham Lincoln's Daily Devotional]

March 28th

Psalms 27:5) For in the time of trouble he shall hide me in his pavilion: in the secret of his tabernacle shall he hide me; he shall set me up upon a rock.

When I can trust my all with God,
In trial's fearful hour -
Bow, all resign'd beneath His rod,
And bless His sparing power;
A joy springs up amid distress,
A fountain in the wilderness.
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