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Husband cheating on my with cross dressers and transexuals

We have been married with my husband for 2 years. We had normal relationship problems. I thought he was the perfect husband since he cooks for me (he finish 3pm, me 7pm from work), he picks me up when i finish late at work, he even do most of the laundry since i am a full time student and full time pharmacy technician.
A few weeks ago, I was getting night mares almost every night. Just after Xmas, I was curious why, I installed a key logger on his laptop (Key logger -records every button he type in his laptop, then the software emails me the logs). I was at work when I read the email that he have another e-mail account inviting transsexuals and cross dressers in our apt. I went home early to talk to him, I was crying and hurt when I talked to him and he admitted he have been doing that. I was so confuse.
We got into a talk he have been cheating on me ever since. Months and months ago, he said every time I get a nightmare, I am never wrong, that those were the days he cheated on me or even meet up with someone casually. He have been meeting people when Im working. Early in the morning when he drops me off to work or late at night when i have to work late every fridays.
According to his emails he have had A LOT of people with him tho casually. I also did got sick (STD) and was positive it was because of him, since I didn't have any other partners after the marriage.
Now we both thought we were soul mates in bed, just cause EVERY SINGLE time we have sex is ALWAYS HEAVEN, ALWAYS FEELS LIKE THE FIRST/SECOND TIME you have sex with some you care for. There were no relationship signs or changes.
I love him so much, even tho my mind is telling me to go and move on, I can never deny the fact that I don't want to leave and is willing to stay as long as he stop that.

But I don't know if I should HOPE on that since I can see that he really is BISEXUAL and just can't admit or he is just not sure about it. He said he wants to stop it cause he really wanna be with me, that he really wants to have kids with me, and that being with me is his final goal of being single. That he wants to change and stop it. BUt I am scared that if he just suppress that part of him, when he have kids and we grew older, he may not be able to control his sexuality and just come one late. and just hurt the kids. :(

Its hard. PLease help. Sad
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First Helper User Profile CarolineEF
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replied January 6th, 2012
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Hi watelr0u and welcome to ehealth: I would have him and possibly you, too, if he wants you to go, see a very good Therapist...Only see a Sex Therapist if they are highly qualifed with a college degree...Otherwise one who handles this type of problem....Possibly they can get to the bottom of his problem...However, if he can't then you may want to move on...He is what he is and you must accept this...I send you my best wishes...Take care...

Caroline
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replied January 7th, 2012
Thanks Caroline. Do you really think therapy will help? I am seeing a psychologist next week. And he is seeing a different one as well.
I'm scared.
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replied January 7th, 2012
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Hi again: It will help as far as getting some closure to his problem...I believe the Psychologist will help you understand the confusion in his mind...All of us are different...The most difficult part of this differnce is accepting the things that we cannot change and going forward in life if it is so written...It can be rough, but anything is possible...

We are always here if we can help...I send you my best wishes...Take care...

Caroline
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replied May 2nd, 2012
Hi you are not alone. I have just discovered by accident not snooping that my husband joined a transexual sex line. He created a profile in which he put that he was bi-sexual (wish he had told me) and that he wanted one to one sex, discreet relationship and texts. I found out because when I switched the power on his computer the next day for my electronic cigarette an instant messager clicked up. I now sit across the table from someone that I trusted with all my heart who has deceived me. I never would have gone onto his lap top but now that I have, I have discovered that all his computer history has been deleted. The man that I thought he was he isn't. I consider this to be infidelity. The other issue is his sexuality. He told me that he was drunk but that is just an excuse to hide behind. He wasn't that drunk as his profile was very well thought out. He had even done a compatibility test with someone. What hurts me is when I ask him about it he runs off to be sick. If he is ashamed of who he is and had to hide it then how can be ever move on from here. He is going to see a counsellor. I dont think he will have the courage to see it through but is just doing it to make it look like he is trying to resolve our predicament. I had no idea. If he had told me he was bi-sexual I would probably still be with him. It is the deceipt and lies. If he is lying to himself then how can he ever be honest with me. I have been married a year and feel so numb. I thank this forum as I am not alone.
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replied May 18th, 2012
I hate cheaters!!!
9 times out of 10 woman intuition in this case right. As my was right too... In my case iv got all confirmations from very supportive and friendly private investigators. They not only did them job, they was next to me as well then i had a hard times.
Am happy now, as i do prefer to live my reality but not in the lies and dreams. I needed facts, confirmation of my intuition...
Would love to recommend them to help you out as well! Ladies! Trust your intuition!!!
I hate cheaters!!
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