How do you stop your abuser before you hit rock bottom?
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replied August 26th, 2009
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try to get him to go to a therapist with you. but honestly if hes abusing you then he doesnt deserve you. goodluck
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Users who thank colton316 for this post: Brokensmile09 

replied August 26th, 2009
You cant stop them and it is not your fault! Get out and go somewhere safe and then maybe you can try some sort of supervised mediation if they are willing to get help. You have to think of yourself and anyone else you may be responsible for first. Be strong and break the trend!

xx
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replied August 31st, 2009
the only answer to that is you need to get away
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Users who thank theresa058 for this post: Brokensmile09 

replied September 1st, 2009
You MUST realize that it's not your fault. Sometimes people have real anger management issues and they take it out on really good people for no reasons except they can't handle themselves appropriately. Unfortunately, the violence of abuse gets worse. Most of the time, they wont even get help and they deny that they are emotionally, verbally or physically abusive. It's kind of sad to allow a person to overstep their boundries but they sometimes have a hard time learning to not do it. You HAVE TO BE strong. You shouldn't deal with it. Having rational talks with them often fails or sometimes causes the abuse to escalate. When this happens, its just time to start thinking about yourself because what is happening is that you are 'trapped.' the only way to get out of that situation is to make plans for yourself. You need to plan the type of future you want for yourself and do everything you can to make sure you go in that direction. Eventually as you move closer to being the person you want to be, he will no longer fit. Find reasons to be busy, fill your schedule so that you aren't home much. Eventually move yourself out of his life. Don't tell him anything because it will drive him to jealousy and he will abuse you much worse. You do need to get out. He will try to be nice to you once he sees you have a life and aren't home much but don't fall for it. You have to understand that once he hits or tries to control or manipulate you, he's just not a nice person who will love and respect you. There's more fish in the sea. Start letting go of this person in your heart and mind.
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replied September 1st, 2009
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Remove the negativity from your life. Seek help from local abuse shelters if necessary. There are numerous support groups out there. I do wish you the best of luck. God Speed!
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Users who thank breck08 for this post: Brokensmile09 

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replied September 1st, 2009
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If you are serious-turn the abuser in..Get your stuff if you live with this person and get into a shelter..The police can get you into a shelter all you have to do is call..They do not give the address out to anyone..You must be careful and not give your location away as you could also endanger others at shelter..
Don't say you're leaving, let the police know that you are afraid and so they can get you help away from this person so that they can't try to stop you..
I hope you heed your own inner warning..kd
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Users who thank kdlee for this post: Brokensmile09 

replied September 1st, 2009
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The only realistic way to stop an abuser is to confront abusive behavior when it begins. Once a pattern of abuse has been established an abuser comes to expect that the abuse will continue to be an outlet for their problems and attempts to oppose them will cause them to escalate.

No matter what you have to leave immediatelty. As a victim of abuse your presence in the cycle of abuse is the only factor you control. When you are not present you are not facilitating their abuse and not causing it to intensify.

You can certainly look into getting them medical assistance but abuse is not cured like a phobia or delusion. People can be medicated for conditions that agrivate their abusive behavior or they can learn tactics to deal with their abusive nature but abusers are not cured, they are managed.
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Users who thank W0LF for this post: Brokensmile09 
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