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Having troubles with confused Boyfriend

I'm 34 yrs of age and my boyfriend is of 33 yrs.We have known each other for the past 3 yrs.Initially it started as a clean friendship and then when i felt an attraction towards him i approached him. He bluntly said 'No' because of family problems and also said he was not ready for marriage. within a couple of months he himself came forward and approached me and said he likes me but still the marriage decision was not done. after that we had been going along easily...never indulged in the the real sex but just kissing and hugging and stuff like that...then couple of years back i changed my job and moved to a different place. this broke him up and he was desperate in getting married..but every time he would decide he would give up again saying 'I'm afraid to get married, not prepared for the responsibility and all'. This has been happening for the past 2 mths. But recently he finally decided to get married and asked me to change my job and come over again in the same place as where he is and all..but last week he again says..i'm thinking whether i should or not...i asked him to end up this relationship once and for all...but even that is not acceptable to him...and now the situation is he wants me to get a job in his place within 3 mths and then he would decide...i'm really confused as to should i move forward with this guy or continue my work...i know he loves me and i too love him and want a life with him.. but not able to understand what is holding him back....

Please suggest....
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replied January 9th, 2010
Extremely eHealthy
You guys don't trust one another or know each other's mind. You're not prepared for a lifelong commitment to one another. This sort of confusion won't exist when you are. You know what you want from a man and it's not what he's offering. Move onward in your life.
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replied January 10th, 2010
Community Volunteer
I would say that he gets what you would call "cold feet"...This is another phrase for "scared to death"...He is afraid of taking that big step into marriage...Remember he has been single for 33 years...If it were me, I would not move for him or do one thing until I had a ring on my finger and marriage license in my pocket...I think he loves you, but giving up his freedom is like cutting off one of his hands...Don't chase him...Make him chase you....Good luck....

Caroline
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Tags: sex, age of love
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