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had depression, most probably since I was a little kid.

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I have had depression, most probably since I was a little kid. When I was around the age of four, I learned the lesson of not depending on someone to get what you need, only what you desire.(such as toys, or gifts) But I was always alone. I have no fatherly figure in my life, and my Mother works full time, so I've never really had anyone. I noticed how a voice would tell me about how she cheated me, or how fat I looked today. Slowly but surly that voice became a comfort, if not there, no one was.
It was the summer of seventh grade my depression really hit full forward, and also the anorexia. Two, which in my opinion should not be together. Since that moment I have wanted to die every single day. I want to cut off the fat from my body and make my mom eat it. I want to scream in her face about how she hates me. But that would get me no where.
I have attempted suicide nearly five times now, and am starting to sketch out a new plan. So please, should I get help?

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replied June 23rd, 2011
Depression Answer A24328
Welcome to the ehealthforum and I am glad to help you. From the description, it seems that you’re suffering from severe depression.

For the same, I’ll suggest consulting a psychiatrist as apart from the anti-depressant pills, you’ll likely need electroconvulsive therapy so that such suicidal ideation can be aborted.

Please do discuss this with someone near and immediately consult a psychiatrist. Your life is extremely precious and remember the role being played by you can’t be played by anyone else in this world.

Hence, please do not try to make another attempt to suicide. I sincerely hope that helps. Take care.

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