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fentanyl-So much pain, afraid of the withdrawal symptoms

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Hi guys i came here to get some help and answers

i have so many questions i don't even know where to begin so i guess i will start with why im in the condition i am in

firstly i would like to say thank you to my wife that stood by me through out all i have gone through as she with Gods help kept me alive to this this day and if it wasn't for her love you would not be reading this right now and i would more than likely have ended my life along time ago. My wife is my wife,best friend,sister and the love of my life that means more to me than anything in this cruel world we are all visiting for a short period of time.

ok

5 to 6 years ago a worker of mine decided to hit on my 14 year old daughter and he was 25 years old. so as a concerned father i opposed the relationship. at this point he had got into my daughters head and talked her into running away with him.

To get my daughter back home i had no choice but to accept the relationship in hope that she would soon give up the relationship. In time he had my daughter out of school smoking marijuana and crystal meth. I was ripping out my hair with no clue on what to do.

6 months later the relationship ended and a few things of my daughters belongings where still at his house. i went there with his mother permission to pick up my daughters belongings and was faced with her Ex and his brother. His brother pulled out a rifle cocked it backed and aimed it at me. I thought at this time is was wise after a few words to leave. Police where then called and charges where laid on his brother. With in days my daughter had again ran away back to her Ex.

I then gave up and cut all ties with my daughter and dropped all charges against her Boy friends brother. 3 months later with in 30 minutes of charges being dropped at the court hearing my daughter was beat up by her Boy friends family and thrown out onto the streets. She called me and i jumped in the car and picked her up to bring her back home. She was left bruised and cut and addicted to drugs at 14 years of age.

For the next two years i spent trying to defend my family with trouble almost everyday. Not being able to sell and move we did our best to stand our ground. It was a living nightmare for my 9 year old son,wife,daughter and my self as these people had lived in the area all there lives and we had only been there for 3 years at the most so they had allot of friends that we did not know.

I had met a friend i considered my best friend and would do anything to help him and his family. One day i got a random call from my friend asking me what i was doing and i told him i was about to go to a job site where i was building a house. I asked him what he was doing and he said nothing as his cement mixer broke down and he couldn't work. He then asked if i would like to go have a coffee. I agreed. before picking him up i went to our local building supplier and bought him a cement mixer so he could work to continue to feed his family as a gift. when i turned up at his house and informed him the mixer was his he cried and then said that no one has ever done anything like that for him. We then dropped off the cement mixer and went to the coffee house that he wanted to go to. The second i stepped foot into the coffee shop i was hit to the left side of my face with a knife and as i turned towards who ever attacked me i was then hit again with a knife about half a inch under my right eye. Before i could respond i was then tackled from behind to the floor where i was beaten unconscious. i awoke in a pool of blood still being attacked but manage somehow to stand up and get out of the coffee shop. i then drove myself to the hospital and informed my wife and police what had just happened.

As a result i ended up with 3 stitchs to the side of my head and 4 stitchs under my right eye, T12 in my back had been ruptured and my right Achilles tendon was torn. i had a broken fingers and a broken nose, 5% brain damage along with other minor bruising and cuts. Again police where called and charges where laid on all people involved in the attack. At court my best friend had turned on me and told the police a total different story and all charges against my attackers where dropped. My friend walked past me in the court room and laughed. I then found out that he was in fact really good friends with my daughters Ex and i was set up by him. He was also paid $5000 by my daughters Ex Boyfriends father. This put me in real deep depression as i couldn't work anymore, i couldn't trust anyone anymore. The pain from my injuries had me taking so much pain meds that i would just sleep day ad night. i was a wreck. I ended up loosing 2 of 3 houses i had because i couldn't afford payments. My parents then where forced to move out of one of the houses they here living in and my own mother took 100k from me because she had given me 60k in the past. i had no one but my wife son even my daughter decided to move out with my mother. i began pain management programs, i was seeing Councillors, psychologist, psychiatrists. My life had basically gone from a person who would be outdoors working all day then riding motorbikes,swimming,camping loving life to a drug dependent bed ridden worthless human being. i lost count of how many times i just wanted to end my life. I spent 3 years trying to get better but there was no better.

soon after my daughter had found herself another dead beat of a boyfriend and decided to get married. i found out 1 hour before the wedding. 3 months later she broke up with him and he turned up at our house with 6 of his friends and iron bars. Yep here we go again. i heard my sons screams for help as i approached the front of the house i was knocked to the floor with a punch and beaten right in front of my son, daughter and my wife with iron bars across my back head and neck for about 2 minutes. it did feel allot longer but it left me with a broken arm fractures in my neck more damage to my back. Again police where called charges where laid and again my daughter decided to move back with her husband where she still is to this day and all charges dropped.

i recovered enough from my injuries to fixed up the house we had left sold up and moved away. Far,Far,Far away. it has now been a year and a half and slowly i am beginning to smile again. we have moved to a nice quite place and i have no friends or family left apart from my wife and son and im just trying to get better. believe it or not my fingers are still broken from the first time i was attacked. i managed to get my self off all my meds apart from fentanyl 75mcg. which leads me to my first question as it is not working well with the chronic back pain.

my new pain doc wants to put a electronic stimulator in my back. i have read on some forums that it is good and some say its bad. is it a do or a dont

my pain runs from t12 all the way to my neck causing headaches that i feel in the back of my eye sockets, it also runs down the back of my legs and i have just started getting pins and needles in my legs to the point that i cant walk for the first 15 to 20 minutes in the mornings. would the device stop this. i have been offered a trial but i am so afraid of back surgery as there are so many risks.

i am also so afraid of the withdrawal symptoms of coming off the fentanyl patchs as i tried once and combined with my pain injuries i honestly didn't know what was going on. was it withdrawal or just my chronic pain getting worse because i was cutting out the pain meds.

i have also been told that my headaches would be fixed with Botox injections in my neck is this normal.

i have moved to a rural area and just dont know if these doctors are doing whats best for me.

all advise is welcome, this is the first time i have ever asked for helped on the net an dont even know if i posted this in the right place

thanks guys
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replied January 23rd, 2019
Thank you for asking at Ehealth forum!

I read your question and I understand your concern.
I would suggest you to have electronic stimulator to combat this chronic pain because drugs will create new problems for you.
I hope it helps. Stay in touch with your healthcare provider for further guidance as our answers are just for education and counselling purposes and cannot be an alternative to actual visit to a doctor.
Take care
Khan
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Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied January 23rd, 2019
Thank you for asking at Ehealth forum!

I read your question and I understand your concern.
I would suggest you to have electronic stimulator to combat this chronic pain because drugs will create new problems for you.
I hope it helps. Stay in touch with your healthcare provider for further guidance as our answers are just for education and counselling purposes and cannot be an alternative to actual visit to a doctor.
Take care
Khan
|
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