hi. im completely new to this forum. a little background: Im 19 and have been on opiates for about two and a half years. I started on percocet nad then made my way to fentanyl patches. I have overdosed twice with one time ending in ICU and a respirator down my throat. My mother cries because on me and my friends, well lets just say I dont have any anymore. Opiates and the hold they have over me have ruined my life. I miss my old life, the carefree one, the one where I didnt constantly think about my next fix.
My question is, is there anyone out there who abuses fentanyl like me? Its such a rare drug its hard to find anyone. Also Id love tips for kicking it from anyone who has.
thanks, katie
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replied November 17th, 2008
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Hi Katie,

There are many people like you...the question is are you ready to stop? If so, I'd suggest that you look into a drug treatment center that can help you detox and then rehabilitate from opiate addiction. You can search a national database here:

http://dasis3.samhsa.gov/

You are not alone! You can also start attending NA meetings. Their meeting locator is here:

http://portaltools.na.org/portaltools/Meet ingLoc/

Please let us know what you decide. You don't need to struggle and fight this alone...but you will need to do some inner work!
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replied December 30th, 2008
There is a solution...
Katie,
Although it may be hard to believe right now, there is a solution to the seemingly hopeless situation you find yourself in. I remember when I was in exactly the same way physically and emotionally. In my mind there was no hope of ever kicking the addiction, and could not imagine living without using something to alter the way I felt normally. In fact, it had been so long since I had been clean and sober, that I had forgotten what normal felt like.

First, Fentanyl may possibly be the most powerful derivation of opium known to medicine. Therefore the addiction and the tolerance associated with long-term use will require medical assistance to address. As you already know, there can be life-threatening consequences if a person doesn't get appropriate medical attention.

I think I remember your saying that your friends and family are aware of your problem. If you have decided that you are ready to make a commitment to get clean and stay clean, you want to recruit these people to be an active part of your support team. You never have to use again, but you cannot stay clean alone. I have never known anyone who is a real addict who can find a solution alone.

Ask your parents or a trusted family member to see your doctor with you. Your doctor may prescribe detox medications to help you with the withdrawal symptoms. The first step in recovery is based on honesty. It will be important that your friends and family know exactly what your doctor has prescribed for you. You will also want to give your medication to a trusted family member to administer to you at the appropriate time and in the appropriate doses to help you avoid the same temptation that lead to your original addiction to Fentanyl.

I won't be dishonest with you. Even with the detox medication, you will feel discomfort while your body becomes accustomed to being without the drug. There may be times when you are tempted to use again, but remember that if you use again you will be right back where you started and probably even worse. Worse than that, after prolonged use and repeated attempts to stop, the drug will actually stop working. Your body will still require the drug but you will no longer experience the euphoria that lead you to use again and again anyway. That's called, "Feeding the Beast." That's when you can't stop using but you can't get high any more. That is truly a nightmare. And some people never get to that point because they die trying to get that elusive high that never comes again.

There are some people who may disagree with the manner in which I have approached the response to your inquiry. However, I have been in your situation and been lucky enough to live through detox and find happiness in while living clean and sober. Unfortunately I've watched too many young people like you die because they either could not or would not get help.

If you are an addict of my variety, you have only one choice. If I were you I would swallow my pride and just say HELP. As one of the other responders suggested, go to the link for Narcotics Anonymous and start attending meetings. You will be surprised by the number of people just like you who have kicked and never gone back. Listen to their stories and do what they tell you to do. Stick with the winners and you will be fine.

If you put some work into your recovery you will be amazed before you are halfway through the process of putting your life on track. When you get it together, don't forget to share your experience, strength and hope with others. Hope is the best gift anyone can give to an addict.

Gook luck and may you find the peace and happiness your creator intended for you. Whether you believe in God or the Force of the universe, there is a power out there somewhere that has a purpose for Katie.
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replied November 4th, 2010
Im the same way
Hi My name is Jason. I like you have a very bad fentanyl habit. I have been abusing drugs since I was 16 and am now 36. I have been abusing opiates for 6. Like you I started out using percs than OC's than heroin. Nothing stops me from using. I have been sectioned tossed in prison kicked in a police station jail cell on a Holiday weekend twice, hurt everyone around me e.t.c. and nothing stops me. I'm at the point where I just want to die. I have been eating patches for 3 years hear and there. This last year and a half I have been on them every day all day. Im eating 2/ 75 mg a day plus taking percs and oc's on top of it. The detox from this drug is the hardest I have done and I have kicked everything. The anxiety that comes from this addiction is almost inhumane and I just can't seem to get through it. I feel like shooting heroin was easier to get off than the patches are. I attend NA meetings and have a sponsor but I still havent been able to stay clean. It's like when I get clean I don't know what to do with myself. I feel like my blood is boiling inside me and all I want is some relief. I know what the consenquences are and still continue to use. Thats the insanity of this disease. My advice to you is to commit fully to a recovery program. On top of that get some proffesional help. If I was 19 I would put myself right in a halfway house to be around people my age that are addicts like me. I'm going to continue to go to meetings(even if I need to get high to get there), and hopefully have this thing sink in. I would advise you to do the same. You are still young and you should do this while you can. It gets harder and harder each time you relapse. If you need anyone to talk to e-mail me and I will be more than happy to talk with you. Good luck and God Bless.
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replied April 3rd, 2012
Hi, I'm an oppiate addict too. I've been at every stage of this disease. I've detoxed by force, i've become a lying, coneiving, deceitful person whose soul purpose is to to get high, someone I don't even recognize. I've tried inpatient and outpatient recovery. I've quit both because driving my addiction is chronic pain from Multiple Sclerosis, Lupus and Endometriosis not to mention mental suffering from depression and anxiety disorder. I have PTSD and an ED (eating disorder). I've been on methadone and am back on fentanyl patch. I wish you well in your recovery, I hope something does kick in for you and give you the motivation you need to get clean. Showing up at NA high is disrespectful to the people in recovery that are there. And nothing is going to sink in through your doped up haze. Peace
A V
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