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Depression, Boredom, Insomnia and Wellbutrin

I'm 44, work feet, have 4 kids and am single. I don't have any expectations of having an above average lifestyle and have come to terms with my mediocrity. I get a few hot flashes so I believe that I am perimenapause. I am wondering if depression can sometimes be confused with plain and simple boredom of the 'same ole routine day in and day out'? I began taking wellbutrin 4 months ago-100 mg once a day in the AM. I thought it was beneficial, at first because I quit "throwing myself in front of the train" to get people to accept me. I've discovered that my social barriers are lowered from the wb-basically I snap easier. I shock myself when I snap sometimes.
I also am taking 15 or 30 mg of temazapam to sleep at night. I've been on sleep med for 9 years. I have gone a few nights w/o the sleeping meds but I prefer to fall asleep faster and experience the deep restorative sleep that the meds provide.
I don't mind being alone anymore and I keep just a handful of friends. I know the cbt steps and want to do them informally w/o professional help-I don't have a flexible schedule with my current work and family schedules.
Anyway, without asking my MD, I'm wondering if anyone recognizes anything profound about what I'm doing or experiencing? I want to continue with the wb and the temazapam but if there is something that I should be taking or if I am overlooking some side effects, I'd appreciate it if folks in the same or similar situation can comment. Thank you
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replied October 23rd, 2008
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Hi sabesabe,

It seems like you're managing the symptoms of depression really well. What more are you looking for in life? If possible, I'd suggest that you take some time out of your schedule to think and do something for yourself...and a good counselor can really ask the right questions to provoke thought for yourself during the week. This doesn't have to be an expensive deal....there are sliding scale clinics in each town. I understand that you prefer to be alone, but what about individual or group therapy to explore your issues and push you into the unknown?
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Users who thank rooted for this post: sabesabe 

replied October 24th, 2008
Hi Rooted,
Thanks for the reply. U r probably right about my going to therapy. I think u r right about "what more do I want from life"....I guess I have the problem of "wanting what I don't have". I need to be happy where I am and quit thinking that the grass is greener on the other side. I tend to put a lot of time, energy, and money into getting an interpersonal relationship with a man. I want the perfect body so I work out twice a day five times a day. I've learned quite a bit by reading other messages from people on this website in various categories. Thank you again for your input.
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replied October 27th, 2008
Active User, very eHealthy
Relationships can be rewarding, but they're also tough! I'm married and sometimes wish I was single...so you're right about the grass being greener. I'd suggest ou follow up and talk to someone too. I think that it can help.
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replied October 27th, 2008
Thanks yogahonebunny,
I need to quit thinking about it so much-hence that is where the anxiety comes into play and the cycle continues endlessly...counseling is a good idea.
Thanks again.
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replied October 28th, 2008
Active User, very eHealthy
Wink You're welcome.
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