Medical Questions > Mental Health > Schizophrenia Forum

Could I be becoming schizophrenic

I don't want to offend anyone if this doesn't sound like schizophrenia but I'm just wondering. The symptoms I have seem to happen when my environment changes: am I with friends, family, strangers, am I stressed at the time. Anyways these are what I feel.
First off I've studied syd Barrett and he smoked weed and took LSD, which doesn't cause schizophrenia but Is bad for those who are predetermined to have it. His friends said that he was a strange person before he was crazy and that he seemed to have a good chance of becoming crazy like he did.
- I am a very creative person, even though I have trouble putting any of my thoughts in a communicable form. My best way is through music, but my lyrics still make for sense to me than a normal person.
-I have a hard time concentrating. This can vary. Ive never been able to read well because I can read a page without going off topic. Yet let's say when I have just took a hard test my concentration just stops, I'll walk into the next class with all my thoughts in my head barely talking to anyone, barely taking into notice what we are even doing. When I get motivated to do something I can't concentrate long enough to make something good out of it. All my lyrics for 4 min song are usually just repeating of a four line verse and a one line chorus. Or if I want to write down my thoughts I end up not doing it because I get off subject or not motivated.
- I've been depressed on and off for two years, I'll go two weeks an get depressed once everyday. Then the next two weeks will be find. However I've started taking vitamin d for my depression an it seems to help, plus it is summer, but I bet during summer break it may return. My depression isn't because someone's hurt me or because of trauma, usually because I fell as though I can't cope with life. I hate what I look like, I don't act like everyone else. I feel like most people act like they should at their age but I cant.
This will probably get people thinking that this is the problem but it doesn't effect everyone the same. Most people that smoke weed have a great time, recently it seems that everytime I smoke I love it at first because I feel great about myself and where I am in life then I start to over think everything and get depressed. I look at people as if people aren't people. We all have thoughts that are so far away from everyone else's thoughts. I see selfish entities. Then I think about my self, I don't feel comfortable about myself. When I do anything I think about how other people are observing me.
I'm not a cigarette smoker but it does something good. It's may, during winter break I felt really good I was playing piano learning guitar getting into video games. Buy I was smoking at least one everyday or every other day. When I would smoke my mind seemed to concentrate I didn't think what others thought of me. I felt really good. When I played ps3 I was doing better because I was more concentrated. Then I stopped. I believe depression came back after I stopped. I've wanted to smoke some not out of addiction but to get that feel again. I smoke an ashes bud and when I do I instantly think back of how good winter break felt.
Depression also for me is a good thing. I barely express my emotions and it not just be hiding them I literally can't. So when I'm depressed I feel like I have motivation to do stuff. I usually write when I'm depressed then as I write it goes away aernd I can't write anymore.
- being numb. This is one of those environment factors, around certain friends Im not that bad and recently I've tired to prevent it. Before my senior I never looked people in the eye to talk, but as the year started I made myself do it so I coul possible can better connections with certain people. Also I talk monotone, someone told me I did about 4 months ago do I tired my best to change that, which it works, but only around certain people or if I'm stressed or not. I usually stare and daydream, most of the time people talk to me then I reply I never start a conversation. Sometimes when I reply to people my answers are short and usually doesn't answer their answer their question. Or if I'm asked something in class I will be finished answering and my teacher looks at me as though I still have more to say. If I'm stressed all of this gets worse.
- lazy and motivation. My room is a mess and I can't stand doing chores. Plus I seem to not have motivation to do anything. At school I don't do my homework because it's hard to sit down and do it plus it makes me stressed so I try to find a away to get a good grade and not do homework. Sometimes I have a fun assignment where we get to make up something. I'll have a great idea and want to to do it but I never do because I can't put my idea on paper and I don't feel good BSing the assignment. So I just don't do it.


There might be more things I've left out. I'm thinking that I could have the chance to become schizophrenic if my environment changes for the worse. I don't have a bad family life and I'm not bullied. But as I graduate and start to live I don't know how things could change. I want a small job right now but I don't think I could handle it.
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replied May 14th, 2013
As far as voices I don't think I've ever experienced that. But one time, if I'm remembering right i don't even know if I am, but I was walking up the stairs and thought I heard someone behind me say my name and I turned and no one I knew was behind me just a bunch of strangers who were in their own world walking up the stairs
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replied May 14th, 2013
I heard that talking to the voice in your head could mean something. That's all I do, talk to that voice. Everytime I think about doing something I rationalize that it's safe but my voice always tells me something could go wrong. Also I never answer with yes or no, usually I guess sure or something like that
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replied May 15th, 2013
I hesitate to say this because it's hard to say that I heard another voice. Today I thought I heard someone whisper my name, and I turned and no one was looking at me, but I was surrounded by a lot of people.
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